How Long Should 4 Year Old Nap

[Unregistered]

Daycare makes bedtime a nightmare!

I too have a 4 year old who has a tv in his room, however, the timer goes off at 9 and he can not cut it back on. He sleeps 2 to 2 1/2 hours at the daycare and I KNOW this is why he will not go to bed at a decent hour at night! He is wired up usually when it is time to lay down, even after a calm relaxing bed time routine. The days that he does NOT sleep at the daycare, he sleeps at night, so I am a believer that it has a lot to do with it. I feel that at this age, the requirement for sleep is different and it affects the sleeping habit of my child. Bravo for the moms that can get their child to bed after sleeping long nap hours, but mine will not because those two hours that he is asleep puts him two hours later on his sleeping time at night!

[DCMom]

The never ending debate...

I haven't weighed in on this because I'm sure that what I do will be unpopular, but it works form me, my kids and my dcp's. I never have a parent ask for no nap or a shorter nap time. I also get a break in the action everyday, except for when a new baby starts and even then it doesn't take long to get them on the schedule.

We don't have have afternoon 'naptime' beyond approximately 2 years old (give or take). After 2, you graduate from your pnp onto a nap mat in the main room and **poof** it's now 'Quiet Time'. From 1:00pm to 2:30pm you MUST be on your napmat, sleeping or not, I don't care. The only rule is stay quiet and on your nap mat. Books are allowed. This is the only time of the day the TV is on, with a movie of their choice (Rated 'G' and usually Disney/Pixar, of course!). I have 100's of kids DVD's.

I have 6 here now ~ ranging from 2.5 to almost 5 ~ 3 are watching the movie and 3 are sleeping. 3 I/T are in PNP's in the other room, also sleeping and it is blissfully quiet. The littles usually go down around 12:30 while the others are playing outside.

This is the method that I have used for 20+ years ~ the only problem the I had was years ago when a parent didn't want her child watching ANY type of TV. I respect that ~ but I also told her that this wasn't the daycare for her child.

I have a WII also and the 5 year old boys can kick my butt at SuperMario on rainy days ::

That's my 2 cents, for what it's worth.

[Mary Poppins]

The never ending debate...

I haven't weighed in on this because I'm sure that what I do will be unpopular, but it works form me, my kids and my dcp's. I never have a parent ask for no nap or a shorter nap time. I also get a break in the action everyday, except for when a new baby starts and even then it doesn't take long to get them on the schedule.

We don't have have afternoon 'naptime' beyond approximately 2 years old (give or take). After 2, you graduate from your pnp onto a nap mat in the main room and **poof** it's now 'Quiet Time'. From 1:00pm to 2:30pm you MUST be on your napmat, sleeping or not, I don't care. The only rule is stay quiet and on your nap mat. Books are allowed. This is the only time of the day the TV is on, with a movie of their choice (Rated 'G' and usually Disney/Pixar, of course!). I have 100's of kids DVD's.

I have 6 here now ~ ranging from 2.5 to almost 5 ~ 3 are watching the movie and 3 are sleeping. 3 I/T are in PNP's in the other room, also sleeping and it is blissfully quiet. The littles usually go down around 12:30 while the others are playing outside.

This is the method that I have used for 20+ years ~ the only problem the I had was years ago when a parent didn't want her child watching ANY type of TV. I respect that ~ but I also told her that this wasn't the daycare for her child.

I have a WII also and the 5 year old boys can kick my butt at SuperMario on rainy days ::

That's my 2 cents, for what it's worth.

Hey, I could've written this! Except I smoke 'em all on the Wii.

On rainy day afternoons we break out the old PS2 and use the EyeToy game to wash windows and pop bubbles and all sorts of fun stuff. Great stuff!

I don't require naps but I do encourage them and induce an environment in my home that practically guarantees them. It's hard not to fall asleep myself!! ::

[Unregistered]

A mom's perspective

Reading through all these responses, I can't help but feel a little bit attacked as a parent of a 4-year-old non-sleeper. She was in a wonderful home daycare who followed the cues of her daycare kids. If they wanted to nap, they napped. If they didn't need naps anymore, or a parent requested no naps, they didn't nap. My daughter has been at home with me for a year now, as I am on mat leave. She does not nap and does NOT need a nap. We have a great bedtime routine, and always have. She is in bed at 7 and lights out by 7:30. If she does happen to have a nap during the day, we keep the bed time routine the same, but she is up and out of bed until 9 or 10. It doesn't matter how "strict" we are, she still gets up. Or asks for water. Or has to go the bathroom. Or just needs to tell us something. As an intelligent and observant parent, I attribute this behaviour to her having had a nap. Not all 4 year-old's need naps. And yes, if you lay her down in a dark room, on a bed, with music, she will go to sleep. It doesn't mean she needed it though. Sometimes, parents do know best.

[Unregistered]

I'd take my preschooler to you anyday, I read the thread and I must say I was waiting for a provider to respond this way. I worked at a preschool for 5 years, it was private and nap time was a requirement. We would provide the children with quiet activities if they did not want to nap. If they fell asleep we would not wake them up but they would not be allowed to sleep over 2 hours. There was NO tv, which in my opinion is well justified. We established an routine: drop off, breakfast, circle time, centers, snack, playground, lunch, story time, nap/quiet,time, snack, community free play, recap, and pick up would be from the classroom/or playground. Someways we would have waterplay, or music etc... Bathroom breaks all day. We even had a may set out all day for anyone who wasn't feeling well or whose parents stated they wanted them to sleep. We made our patents a priority an as long as it was safe and in the best interest of the child, we always gave it. It did not make us push overs, it made us a team. I have my preschooler now and I have been blessed to have been home with him since he was born, he started prek now at a public school and their policy is 30 minutes nap/quiet time b/c they are only there from 8-2 pm. I wish my son would Sleep! But he doesn't and there is NO one to blame, he is an individual, every child is different! He relaxes when he gets home, (he doesn't crash not get cranky), I feed him, bathe him, read to him for 30 minutes, and cuddle with him. Sometimes I pass out right next to him. He is out by 7:30 pm and up by 7 am everyday. He use to nap for 2.5-3 hours and go to bed by 9 am just a couple weeks ago but he's adjusted to life as a preschooler. Go with the flow, be flexible, respect children as individuals. They are not just "kids" they are little people!

[Unregistered]

Oh no you didn't....

I have a 4 year old who has to lay on a mat for 1 and a half hours at her preschool/day care center. She can't get her little body to rest/sleep. The teachers reward the resting sleeping children with stickers. So every day my daughter comes home crying thinking she did something wrong because she gets no reward. Every child is different. To force a 4 year old to lay on a mat for that long doing nothing is bizarre to me. Could someone please post the Maryland state regulation that says child care workers must force a child to lay on a mat for 2 hours.

I think I read that regulation at one point and it states that a child care center must offer a nap area and a rest period but it is up to the child if he/she wants to nap or rest. I understand the need for quiet time but please this is crazy the way you think you can force children to sleep or sit still on a mat when their bodies are not able to do so.
Stop and really think about the power struggle you are creating. The feeling of shame you are creating in these children when you are telling them to do this and if they don't something is wrong with them.
You are interrupting the regulation all wrong. This regulation was to support and understand the needs of the child not to give the care giver a break.

Read and reread the regulation with each individual child in mind. Then please, please listen to the parents who knows more about their own child then the person in government that wrote a regulation that is being misused.

I agree that it's not right that they give all the kids stickers or awards after nap time and not giving her one for being quite but not sleeping. And maybe they should let her read a book or watch a movie in a seperate room, but thats not fair to say that Child Care workers aren't entitled to 1 break when working with 5+ children for up to 8+ hours! Many FCC/daycare's don't even use this time to just rest: sometimes this is the only meal/bathroom break they get between 6/7am-12/1 and they don't get regular manditory 15 minute breaks after every 2 hours of work like most jobs (at least according to CA break laws) while getting paid as little as 1.50 an hour per kid which is less than minimum wage. Some providers also use this time to have staff meetings, set up for afternoon activities, clean up, work on food program forms (which pays them to feed your child so that you don't have to pay more), paperwork/ record keeping/ taxes, work on curriculum, updating CC websites, returning missed calls, balancing checkbooks, preparing snacks, work on upcomming events/ parents notices, etc. Maybe you should volenteer at a daycare and see if you are willing to do all this for little pay and no breaks or benifits.

[Unregistered]

My 4 year old doesn't nap

First off, he doesn't have a TV in his room, nor would we allow that. Second, we do have a set routine of bath, books, then bedtime between 7:30 and 8 and he sleeps for about 11-12 hours. Even if he gets as little as a 25 minute nap during the day, he will inevitably refuse his bedtime and be up playing in his room til 10 or later, no matter how much we try to discipline him. Maybe the routine nap will make him less cranky at times if he was willing to take it (I admit he can be a pill some times), but his required 2.5 hour preschool nap time seems ridiculously long. I got about a 30-45 minute nap at his age and rarely would sleep the duration. The quiet playtime at his school appears to be lip service as the teachers seem to snap at kids who aren't laying their heads down and sleeping. I'm uncomfortably certain when my son tries to play quietly or read his books, he's yelled at to lay down and that's messed up. When did the preschool teachers begin taking 2.5 hour lunch times? Seems like any more than one hour is is a waste of valuable learning time and my money. We're already paying the price of a college tuition but yet these preschools appear to be teaching much less than when I was a child, and adding an extra hour and half adds insult to injury. If my son got an associates degree from the two years of paying a college tuition, I wouldn't probably complain, but he's obviously not. This mandate really needs some refinement as it is making my son not want to go to school since he's routinely getting yelled at for wanting to read his books or draw during quiet time, which accounts for ALMOST HALF THE TIME HE's AT SCHOOL.

[Unregistered]

Really?

First off, he doesn't have a TV in his room, nor would we allow that. Second, we do have a set routine of bath, books, then bedtime between 7:30 and 8 and he sleeps for about 11-12 hours. Even if he gets as little as a 25 minute nap during the day, he will inevitably refuse his bedtime and be up playing in his room til 10 or later, no matter how much we try to discipline him. Maybe the routine nap will make him less cranky at times if he was willing to take it (I admit he can be a pill some times), but his required 2.5 hour preschool nap time seems ridiculously long. I got about a 30-45 minute nap at his age and rarely would sleep the duration. The quiet playtime at his school appears to be lip service as the teachers seem to snap at kids who aren't laying their heads down and sleeping. I'm uncomfortably certain when my son tries to play quietly or read his books, he's yelled at to lay down and that's messed up. When did the preschool teachers begin taking 2.5 hour lunch times? Seems like any more than one hour is is a waste of valuable learning time and my money. We're already paying the price of a college tuition but yet these preschools appear to be teaching much less than when I was a child, and adding an extra hour and half adds insult to injury. If my son got an associates degree from the two years of paying a college tuition, I wouldn't probably complain, but he's obviously not. This mandate really needs some refinement as it is making my son not want to go to school since he's routinely getting yelled at for wanting to read his books or draw during quiet time, which accounts for ALMOST HALF THE TIME HE's AT SCHOOL.

Oh my goodness.... With a laundry list that long of grievances, I have to wonder what kind of parent continues to allow their child to attend such a terrible place?!

[Crystal]

and it's the thread that never ends, yes it goes on and on my friends.....

Okay, as a provider who does not insist on children napping, I do undertsand where parents are coming from when they request shorter naps for their child. HOWEVER, I have to question parents who insist that their child be in bed by 7:30-8:00 every night. WHY???????????? Why are you insisting your child go to bed that early, when clearly they are not sleeping that early, AND you have only had a couple of hours with them. Is it, perhaps, because YOU want a break at the end of your long day? Why should a provider spend 9-11 awake hours with your child. and not get even half an hour break during a VERY busy, hectic day so that you can have 1 or two awake hours with your child and then put your non-napping child to bed at 8:00????

I'd call that hypocrisy.

[Lucy]

Seriously??? Did this thread REALLY need to get opened back up again?? Ugh!!!

[Unregistered]

Mean

If your child no longer needs a nap, pull them from the home daycare and wrestle it out with a center that is probably going to tell you your child needs to lay down for a certain amount of time.
Not every environment is right for every child. We do a ton of arts and crafts in my home. A couple of projects every day. It's what I do. I would not make and exception for a child that was into sports or basketball or soccer or whatever to go outside and play their choice of sports while the rest of us did the art activities. If that child or their parents were so opposed to doing what I had scheduled, and they knew that was the type of program I ran, then they need to find care elsewhere.
Nap time is a scheduled daily activity and it is usually written about in every home providers policy so the parents should know about it in advance. If they do not want their child participating in any of the scheduled daily activities then the child should not be in that program. The provider should not be and is not obligated to "make exceptions" for anyone.
Kid age out of programs all the time. To the woman who left and put her kid in a Montessori program - you probably did your provider a favor and saved her the time and energy of finding an excuse to terminate you. Home providers don't really have the luxury of worrying about the best interests of a particular child, it's the best interest of all of the children. If your kid is the square peg and going to screw up the nap routine of all of the rest of the kids, YOUR kid needs to go somewhere else. Not really an issue.

You just sound like a bully

[Unregistered]

WOW. This kids 4 years old?

Obviously the father must have a girlfriend....I don't know of any man who would allow this to go on for 4 years (kid sleeping in the bed, no "marital time" available).

Your ignorance shows. We have a 4 year old daughter who has slept in our bed since birth. My husband and I are happily married.

We put her to bed at 7pm in our bed (read, sing, lights out 7:30). We have plenty of time to make love all around the house-- including the guest room, couch, floor, etc. You have to have a really dead love life to believe the myth that parents who co-sleep don't get any, . We make love during the day while the kids are playing in other rooms, on date nights, whenever. You are clueless.

[Leanna]

Sooooo...it was a bright, sunny, & seasonably warm day here in NY. Lovely June weather.

[mamac]

Random Fact: The infinity sign is properly known as a "lemniscate."

[Josiegirl]

Why would a home daycare provider need a "Break" during the day to get their "own" chores done? I am at work all day a do get to get my "own" chores done on my break.

Yeh, why would we need a break? All we do is sit around, watch tv all day with the kids and eat bonbons.
Good grief!

And "our" chores?? Gimme a break. These extra chores are caused by lots of extra little hands and feet running through our home all day long. Extra dishes. Extra clutter. Extra everything everywhere. I do not do laundry during the day but if I didn't keep up with some of this other stuff, we'd eat off the table and trip over our own feet.

My crew's ages are from 1 year-6 years. I require a rest time in the afternoon. The only one to usually fall asleep is the 1 yo. But for one hour, just ONE hour, we all rest our bodies, our voices, and we don't call it nap time or rest time, we call it quiet time. I try to emphasize resting for my 2 1/2 yo but other than that, the others are allowed to do puzzles, read, watch an hour long video(only time of the day tv is allowed). They're also allowed to play quietly but they know I'm also having quiet time. Why? Well, because for the past 5 hours prior to that, I've been at their beck and call, didn't eat breakfast or lunch for that matter, had to stop bickering, do toileting, chase them outside, inside, read stories, change diapers, plan activities, paint, color, keeping up with dishes, making sure the floor is clear of all chokeables, you name it, and I've been doing it. So for that one hour *I* need to unwind/recharge before the next 4 hours begin. That way *I* can give the same quality care all day long.

It's not about keeping your child out of my hair, because they visit me constantly while I have computer time during quiet time, asking for water, telling me this, telling me that, asking for help with whatever. Plus it's for the little ones who do fall asleep and need their sleep. If the house is filled all day long with chaos and activity, the children go home all stressed out, grumpy as he!! and then their parents have to deal with it. Quiet time gives ALL of us a little much-needed break.

Granted, I only read page 1 but this is the way I do things here.