Some People Can Be So Judgmental...

[Lucy]

You are correct!!! Ugh...my computer loads so ridiculously slow...

The only post I saw was Michaels when I started typing.

Vista... what can you do :confused:

LOL. Just a ha-ha from me.

Windows Vista?? I heard there are lots of problems with it. Maybe it's not your OS though. Maybe it's your browser. Are you on IE? Maybe try Firefox. I have much more luck with FF, and never use IE anymore at all. Or you could try Google Chrome?

EDIT: Sorry for off-topic. Oops.

[sharlan]

When you go onto a public forum and ask for people's opinions, that just what you get. Everyone here has different opinions and ideas of how things should be done. We all have different life experiences to draw from.

Do I agree with everyone's opinion here? Absolutely not. But I respect what they have to say. I listen to what they have to say and then take it or leave it.

Does everyone here agree with what I have to say? There's a few that disagree with most of what I say. That's great because it gives me a different perspective to look from.

I would never want to be on a forum where everyone agreed with every word I said. I want other's opinions, suggestions, and thoughts. I learn by hearing the other side.

[MyAngels]

One thing to think about is that 3 important things are missing in forums like this -- tone of voice, facial expression, and body language. Those things are EXTREMELY important when it comes to getting a message across the way you really mean it, and for it not to sound argumentative.

That being said, I only saw 2 people who disagreed with you, but many who were on your side in one way or another. (Even though they said they wouldn't put their child in Daycare, they would put them in pre-school, so I considered those "on your side".)

Try this.... re-read that 1st message that you thought was judgmental, and read it as if it was from your best friend, mom, sister, etc. Read it as if it's from someone who is just throwing thoughts out there, but is not trying to put you down. Read it with a GOOD tone of voice, a smile, and an extended hand of helpfulness. You may get a whole different meaning from it. Just sayin...

To sum up, please don't write off this great forum because of just 1 or 2 people. Just ignore them if they made you feel judged, and move on to the next person. But also give them the benefit of the doubt that they may have said it with good intentions, not bad.

Very well put. This should be required reading for all internet forums .

[Michael]

One thing to think about is that 3 important things are missing in forums like this -- tone of voice, facial expression, and body language. Those things are EXTREMELY important when it comes to getting a message across the way you really mean it, and for it not to sound argumentative.

That being said, I only saw 2 people who disagreed with you, but many who were on your side in one way or another. (Even though they said they wouldn't put their child in Daycare, they would put them in pre-school, so I considered those "on your side".)

Try this.... re-read that 1st message that you thought was judgmental, and read it as if it was from your best friend, mom, sister, etc. Read it as if it's from someone who is just throwing thoughts out there, but is not trying to put you down. Read it with a GOOD tone of voice, a smile, and an extended hand of helpfulness. You may get a whole different meaning from it. Just sayin...

To sum up, please don't write off this great forum because of just 1 or 2 people. Just ignore them if they made you feel judged, and move on to the next person. But also give them the benefit of the doubt that they may have said it with good intentions, not bad.

Yes, this is well said. I think I am going to copy this and put it in the New Members Forum as a sticky.

https://www.daycare.com/forum/showthread.php?t=31242

[nannyde]

You are correct!!! Ugh...my computer loads so ridiculously slow...

The only post I saw was Michaels when I started typing.

Vista... what can you do :confused:

The only post I saw was Michaels when I started typing. Look at the minutes of the posts.

[Lucy]

Very well put. This should be required reading for all internet forums .

Thanks! I rock! LOL

[Lucy]

The only post I saw was Michaels when I started typing. Look at the minutes of the posts.

16 minutes

[learn-n-grow]

One thing to think about is that 3 important things are missing in forums like this -- tone of voice, facial expression, and body language. Those things are EXTREMELY important when it comes to getting a message across the way you really mean it, and for it not to sound argumentative.

That being said, I only saw 2 people who disagreed with you, but many who were on your side in one way or another. (Even though they said they wouldn't put their child in Daycare, they would put them in pre-school, so I considered those "on your side".)

Try this.... re-read that 1st message that you thought was judgmental, and read it as if it was from your best friend, mom, sister, etc. Read it as if it's from someone who is just throwing thoughts out there, but is not trying to put you down. Read it with a GOOD tone of voice, a smile, and an extended hand of helpfulness. You may get a whole different meaning from it. Just sayin...

To sum up, please don't write off this great forum because of just 1 or 2 people. Just ignore them if they made you feel judged, and move on to the next person. But also give them the benefit of the doubt that they may have said it with good intentions, not bad.

I'm not writing off the forum, I am just shocked at how judgmental people can be and as I stated in my post, I am not just referring to my post. There were other posts with similar subjects. I know that written words can be misconstrued so I take that into consideration. Just as you have said read it that way, people should take the time to be sure that what they are writing does not come across that way.

[Cat Herder]

The only post I saw was Michaels when I started typing. Look at the minutes of the posts.

:::::: all of our keyboards were flying at the same time. ...::

[dave4him]

Yes. Now as a Stay at home dad its my belief that every person, mom or dad, is designed for what they can and cannot do. We cant put everyone in the same test tube because they are all various shapes and types. My wife loves our kids and they are the joy of her life, but could she stay at home with them rather than me - after a year of being at home with them myself - not without a great deal of help... she was made to be a wonderful mother and i was made to be a wonderful father, but there is simply no reason to cast judgment.

[learn-n-grow]

What I am not saying is that I want everyone to agree with me and I am not referring to only my post. I have read a couple other posts with a similar subject and people can be so mean. I can take an opinion, that's not the problem. But to say why have kids if you don't want to stay home with them or you need to get your priorities straight if you want to put your child in day care is a little extreme for me.

[dave4him]

Why have kids?...... well for starters so the human race doesnt go extinct

[Lucy]

What I am not saying is that I want everyone to agree with me and I am not referring to only my post. I have read a couple other posts with a similar subject and people can be so mean. I can take an opinion, that's not the problem. But to say why have kids if you don't want to stay home with them or you need to get your priorities straight if you want to put your child in day care is a little extreme for me.

Again, just ignore that person who you feel insulted you, and move on to the next person.

[Blackcat31]

What I am not saying is that I want everyone to agree with me and I am not referring to only my post. I have read a couple other posts with a similar subject and people can be so mean. I can take an opinion, that's not the problem. But to say why have kids if you don't want to stay home with them or you need to get your priorities straight if you want to put your child in day care is a little extreme for me.

Oh Hun, you ain't seen nothin' yet.

Go back and read some of the older posts and discussions. Some of them were pretty interesting to say the least.

I hear you though and know exactly what you mean but honestly, to each his (her) own. Pick out the advice you like and skip the rest. Works for me.

I am too old and too impatient to call people out that I disagree with or think are rude/judgemental.

I chose to believe in Karma instead. Works better....and alleviates the stress.

[learn-n-grow]

When you go onto a public forum and ask for people's opinions, that just what you get. Everyone here has different opinions and ideas of how things should be done. We all have different life experiences to draw from.

Do I agree with everyone's opinion here? Absolutely not. But I respect what they have to say. I listen to what they have to say and then take it or leave it.

Does everyone here agree with what I have to say? There's a few that disagree with most of what I say. That's great because it gives me a different perspective to look from.

I would never want to be on a forum where everyone agreed with every word I said. I want other's opinions, suggestions, and thoughts. I learn by hearing the other side.

I am not looking for everyone to agree with me. In this particular instance, I wanted to know if there were any other providers that have put their child in childcare. If you haven't then you have nothing to say. YOu don't need to tell me that I need to re-evaluate things and get my priorities straight.