DCM/DCD Seem Upset I Didn't Tell Them DCK Now On Nap Mats

[trix23]

Hi, me again. Same drop-in client that I'm having issues with (the one that wants a phone conference tomorrow) is saying that they have questions/concerns about eating and sleeping issues here.

(DCG comes 1x/week and has only come 2-3x so far)

We recently started doing naps on nap mats (vs pack n plays like I've been doing the whole time I've been in business. new playroom setup and we are now doing naps in the playroom) and they said they have concerns with sleep for their daughter.

She screams quite a bit (for like 20 minutes) at naptime, which they told me about beforehand, but I don't give into her screaming. I can tell by how she's doing it that it's for attention (not like she's legitimately crying/upset). I don't mention it to DCM cause I expect the newness of daycare to take awhile to adjust. It's already gotten better because I don't make a fuss about it like DCM does. Active ignore.

This family has a $25 late pick-up fee due and hasn't paid it yet (from Monday- it's due same-day). there's 2 loopholes in my contract that they found and are already using that against me.

Their daughter isn't even 2 yet and they are talking about potty training and etc and I have certain requirements for that. mom brought cloth diapers in one day and said I can use them if I want but that she doesn't have a wet bag yet. (ie: i didn't use them as that's a requirement for cloth diapers)

Just have a feeling that if i keep them around that this will never never end. i had a crazy DCM a few months ago that was fighting me tooth and nail about food being offered and that her DCB had gluten and milk sensitivity, though i told her that i serve these things at the tour. I had to be stern with her in a long email that no, I am not negotiating what food is offered and that she can either provide food, have her kid eat what I serve, or put in their 2 weeks' notice.

It's like deja vu all over again..... my intuition is telling me to term them after this conference call on Friday afternoon.

***QUESTION***
If you go from pack-n-plays to nap mats, do you give your parents a heads up? Or just try it out?

What about other mild changes like that?

Main reason I did it was because the daycare room has more space in it now to nap kids in there on nap mats. (I also have mild arthritis in my hands so setting up pack n plays every day hurts). They seem upset I didn't consult them first! ::::::

[sharlan]

My parents don't ask and I don't tell when we switch from the pack and play to the mats.

IMHO, I think it's time to let this family go. They don't seem to be worth the one day a week.

[Snowmom]

eek gads.

I think they need a nanny.

But, to answer your question:
I decide when we transition here, not the parents. Unless there is a medical reason (which I can't think of any offhand that would require a child to stay in a crib), they transition here at 2 yrs old. I have done it as early as 17 months with one child who was a dream, but most of the time, I wait until 2 and say that to families at the initial tour.

[Denali]

After reading your other thread about them feeling "unfairly treated" and now this, I'd just term effective now.

They sound completely entitled and like they are just looking for problems to whine about. Whether it's a true complaint or made up.

I'd also place a call to licensing today (before you term) and explain what is going on with this family and that you are terminating services. That you are covering your bases if they decide to make a call and report you for whatever they decide you've slighted them for.

Because I can bet you they will call and file a complaint. They seem to be good at that. 🙄

[Baby Beluga]

I don't tell parents unless they ask.

I try to start everyone off on a cot (easier). If they don't nap well then I'll move them to a PNP and re try the cot in a couple of months.

[Blackcat31]

If they ask questions about nap/rest routines I tell them at what age I try to transition them to a nap mat. If they don't ask specifically I just discuss nap/rest polices in general.

I think the biggest issue you are having with clients isn't really anything to do with any of your policies but maybe with HOW your policies are conveyed to them and whether or not these new families truly understand your methods.

For example I have a basic guideline sheet for interviewing.
I list the topics I will NOT budge or waive and sometimes bullet-point things I think will apply to potential family. Then I make darn sure I cover those topics really really well so that when they leave I am fully confident that they know, understand and CAN adhere to those policies.

I don't just say "You read and understand everything right?" and wait for them to ask any questions or mention concerns. I kind of get pushy about it. As an example I've said things like this during the tour/after the tour on the phone or in e-mail conversations with parents.

You read the section on toilet training correct Ellen? SO you understand that I will NOT take your child to the toilet every 15-30 minutes throughout the day?

You also understand that your child cannot wear underwear until those skills we discussed (also which are listed in the handbook) have been met? Oh, good!

I also want to really make sure you understand that I don't provide a grace period for pick ups or for payments due? If you are unsure of any of the polices in this area please re-read your handbook as this area is THE most misunderstood in the world of childcare and since I have some really firm consequences for these things.
I hate to implement them if a parent doesn't fully understand my policies so again please make sure you reread that section in the handbook so that we are both on the same page."

Those examples aren't necessarily the exact words I use but are examples of the type of conversations and back/forth chit chat that I make a purposeful point of doing so just some random suggestions on really making sure parents understand your policies in the same way that you intended them to.

It sounds like families like you and are interested in using your services but the issues arise from the last few parents either purposely trying to manipulate you/your policies or arise because parents don't really understand them. I am going with the latter as that seems to fit better.

Anyways, I hope that helps.

[trix23]

From my end, it seems like manipulation after being enrolled and hoping that I will just do as they say. I don't want to come across as being rude/mean early on in the relationship with them, but maybe I do need to have a Contract/Policy conference if they are thinking of enrolling where i go over the whole handbook with them and they can ask any questions at that time.

[storybookending]

I just switched a 21 month old to a toddler bed from a pack n play. She's in a crib at home and I did tell mom I was doing it but the child in question is also my niece. I snap chatted mom a picture of her resting on her bed after she fell asleep 5 minutes after laying down. She screenshot it and posted it to Facebook about how proud she was. This family seems like they are best off not enrolling in group care. I would tell them I will no longer be available to them for drop in care.

[Rockgirl]

This family would be gone yesterday here!

[trix23]

What would you say in response to all this?

[Leigh]

From my end, it seems like manipulation after being enrolled and hoping that I will just do as they say. I don't want to come across as being rude/mean early on in the relationship with them, but maybe I do need to have a Contract/Policy conference if they are thinking of enrolling where i go over the whole handbook with them and they can ask any questions at that time.

At interviews, I do the tour, then I sit down with both parents and basically read my contract/handbook (mine is one document) to them. For example: Payments are due on Friday by pickup time. After pickup time, a fee of $10 per day will be assessed ($10 for Friday, $10 for Saturday, $10 for Sunday, etc.). Payment AND late fees must be paid before your child will be accepted into care again.
This means that you may not drop your child off on Monday if you haven't paid the fees. If you understand, initial here: ___

After pickup time, late fees are $1 per minute, payable at pickup. Late pickups are not acceptable unless arranged at least 24 hours in advance (there will be a fee for this, as well). I close at 5:30-Are you able to have your child picked up by this time every day? If you understand that your child must be picked up by 5:30, and that every minute after 5:30 is billed at $1 per minute, initial here: ___.

This isn't it word for word, but this is how I do it. I have BOTH parents initial each and every section of my contract agreeing that they understand and agree to my policy. This has DRAMATICALLY cut down on "do I have to pay for XXX?" "Can he stay here til 7 on Friday so I can go to the Library?"

I actually have changed portions of my contract for some parents during these discussions if it was mutually beneficial, but after it is signed, it is what we go by.

[Leigh]

As far as the nap mats-it seems to me that they're just looking for things to get upset over at this point. The only thing that matters is that their child is safe and is getting those naps. Whether in a PNP or on a mat truly isn't significant...I really believe they're just being a-holes at this point.

[mommyneedsadayoff]

ummm, why do they even care? I am not a fan of micro managers. I would term and move forward.

[trix23]

At interviews, I do the tour, then I sit down with both parents and basically read my contract/handbook (mine is one document) to them. For example: Payments are due on Friday by pickup time. After pickup time, a fee of $10 per day will be assessed ($10 for Friday, $10 for Saturday, $10 for Sunday, etc.). Payment AND late fees must be paid before your child will be accepted into care again.
This means that you may not drop your child off on Monday if you haven't paid the fees. If you understand, initial here: ___

After pickup time, late fees are $1 per minute, payable at pickup. Late pickups are not acceptable unless arranged at least 24 hours in advance (there will be a fee for this, as well). I close at 5:30-Are you able to have your child picked up by this time every day? If you understand that your child must be picked up by 5:30, and that every minute after 5:30 is billed at $1 per minute, initial here: ___.

This isn't it word for word, but this is how I do it. I have BOTH parents initial each and every section of my contract agreeing that they understand and agree to my policy. This has DRAMATICALLY cut down on "do I have to pay for XXX?" "Can he stay here til 7 on Friday so I can go to the Library?"

I actually have changed portions of my contract for some parents during these discussions if it was mutually beneficial, but after it is signed, it is what we go by.

I was told by my mentor not to go over policies at the initial tour because it seems too harsh and they will lose interest.... :\

You have them initial on each line at the end of your tour? Or once they decide to enroll?

[daycare]

It seems like to me they are just picking at every little thing they can find becuase they are mad about the other situation with the late fee.

I really think you know yourself best and if you are having that gut feeling to let them go, do it.

BTW I don't go over all of my policies in detail during the tour. After the tour if I decide that I like them and want to enroll, I will email everything but the 2 page contract and PHB.

I require an enrollment meeting where we go over all documents to make sure they are correctly filled out and then I go over contract. My contract is 2 pages and very to the point. I make them sign it right there and HIGHLIGHT the most important parts. Like don't pick up late or you will pay...

At this time they also make their first payment. I will NOT start their child if they don't attend this meeting. It takes about 45 minutes to go over everything and I have never had a family tell me no or try to argue with me about it. CA has so much paperwork that needs to be filled out and in my hands before I can provide services and I can't afford to be sighted for lack of paperwork, so this works best for me.

I hope it all works out for you.