Parent Visiting Day Care Every Day for an Extended Time

[sleepinghart]

In the op it says the restraining order no longer includes the child but because of the current order with the spouse, visitation outside of day care isn't happening.

Again, I'm not comfortable with the situation but the providers hands may legally be tied. Unless there is a current order of protection in file that includes the child, she probably can't deny access to a parent.

~I understand she can't deny the parent access, I understand that the current order doesn't include the child, but here's what I don't understand- are CA providers not allowed to have their own policy like no one can visit for hours at a time, or if a parent wants they can stay at daycare all day with their child?:confused: I know that this particular CA provider is allowing it, but surely she doesn't have to right?

[sleepinghart]

~I understand she can't deny the parent access, I understand that the current order doesn't include the child, but here's what I don't understand- are CA providers not allowed to have their own policy like no one can visit for hours at a time, or if a parent wants they can stay at daycare all day with their child?:confused: I know that this particular CA provider is allowing it, but surely she doesn't have to right?

~Sorry...I'm slow today! I see where others above have already answered this question . Again, I apologizelovethis.

[Ariana]

The way I see it, the dad has a right to his child, as in he can pick up whenever he wants but he does not have the right to stay and be around other kids or on the daycare property beyond what is normal. I would not allow this kind of thing to happen under any circumstances.

[Play Care]

~Sorry...I'm slow today! I see where others above have already answered this question . Again, I apologizelovethis.

A provider can make any policy they want - the issue is IF that rule will be upheld by licensing.

For instance, I know some providers here have a rule that doesn't allow pick ups during nap time. This is actually against regulations in my state. If a parent wants to pick up their child at any time, I need to hand their kid over. Doesn't matter that it might be in my contract and the parent signed it.

Now, I don't *think* licensing would condone a parent hanging out for hours at a clip, but I couldn't swear to it.

Again, the op should really bring her concerns to the provider.

[Meeko]

Good question. She should talk with the provider to get the full story.

I feel bad for the Dad and the child. Obviously there are some issues, but at least he wants to spend time with his child. Not all non-custodial Dads are like that.

I thought that once. I had a dad who came regularly to see his daughter. He seemed like a nice guy who just wanted to spend time with his child.

Turns out he was a pedophile. Had a record in another state...rape of a child.

He had been coming to my daycare to get his jollies being around all the little ones. He was abusing his own daughter. He ended up in prison...but I had let this monster in my home regularly.

NEVER again. I do not allow parents to come and hang out.

[Meeko]

I get what you're saying but then he needs to take the child elsewhere, not hang out at the daycare. Also, I wouldn't allow this type of behavior from either parent. I would never want to be in the middle of this type of situation. If anyone tried to pull this with me, I would replace and term based on the simple fact of not making it my problem.

[Meeko]

In my state (Utah) a parent must have ACCESS to their child at any time they are in care.

Some people assume that means they can come and hang out at daycare. Not so.

A parent must have access which means their child cannot be kept from them. They are to be able to have their child brought to them at any time.

It does NOT mean the parent had access to the providers home for as long as they wish. Anyone spending time on a regular basis has to have a background and fingerprint check.

Parents must have access to THEIR child. They have NO rights to access to other people's children.

The father needs to told he can pick up his child any time he wants.....but he cannot hang out. That would mean HE has to be supervised by the provider and she is not paid for that.

[Nurse Jackie]

I personally wouldn't do it as a matter of fact I probably would term just so I wouldn't be caught in the middle of their situation. Him having a restraining order lets me know he's probably a violent person. I wouldn't want to put myself or the other kids in my care in any danger if he decides he wants to kidnap his child and hurt me or any other kid in my care while doing so. You just never know what another person is capable of.

[renodeb]

It almost sounds as though that parent is going around the restraining order by visiting that dc every day. I dont even like it when a parent comes by for a short visit. It disrupts the schedule. Its not that provider's responsibility to facilitate visits with the child.
Deb

[Unregistered]

She is essentially supervising his visits for free. If he can't have unsupervised visits with his kid then why can he be around others kids?

If he can have unsupervised visits with his kid then he can pick the kid up and return the child at specific times.

If the provider is expected to supervise she needs to charge a $20 an hr supervised visit fee. Paid up front and not to be included in the tuition fees.

Generally when supervised visits are ordered there is a supervisor assigned/agreed to. I somehow doubt the dcp is the assigned supervisor.

OP is your friend the mom of this child? If not, then IMO she needs to say something to the mom. I've BEEN the mom in this case.. and it is so very, very wrong to allow this.

He is NON custodial and does not have free and clear access. The court has ordered that he have supervised time with his child, and there will be a schedule to go with that. He is bypassing the court order. He absolutely should not be there. The mom of this child needs to be notified ASAP, and the DCP needs to give her head a shake.

[Unregistered]

In my state (Utah) a parent must have ACCESS to their child at any time they are in care.

The father needs to told he can pick up his child any time he wants.....but he cannot hang out. That would mean HE has to be supervised by the provider and she is not paid for that.

Even when there's a court order stating other wise? He only has supervised access.

Unless I missed something. This isn't a custodial parent.

[Thriftylady]

Even when there's a court order stating other wise? He only has supervised access.

Unless I missed something. This isn't a custodial parent.

If he can't take the child with him, then he wouldn't be allowed to see the child at my daycare. I don't allow any parent to hang around on site. It is a disruption and a liability. So if he can't take the child, well I guess he has to go to his scheduled visitation. This is not the provider's issue, it is a family issue. One I as a provider would refuse to involve myself in.

[Unregistered]

If he can't take the child with him, then he wouldn't be allowed to see the child at my daycare. I don't allow any parent to hang around on site. It is a disruption and a liability. So if he can't take the child, well I guess he has to go to his scheduled visitation. This is not the provider's issue, it is a family issue. One I as a provider would refuse to involve myself in.

Exactly. The provider should have nothing to do with it. Nothing.

I have to wonder if OP is the provider given the amount of information she has.

[EntropyControlSpecialist]

Exactly. The provider should have nothing to do with it. Nothing.

I have to wonder if OP is the provider given the amount of information she has.

I've been thinking the same thing. She needs to know it isn't okay so it'd benefit her if it is her.

[Blackcat31]

Generally when supervised visits are ordered there is a supervisor assigned/agreed to. I somehow doubt the dcp is the assigned supervisor.

This is not always the case. I know several providers who are the "assigned" person. It depends on the details of each situation.

OP is your friend the mom of this child? If not, then IMO she needs to say something to the mom. I've BEEN the mom in this case.. and it is so very, very wrong to allow this.

Who says mom isn't aware? OP only stated the provider didn't notify OTHER parents. Maybe the mom prefers the non-custodial dad does his visiting at the daycare so that she doesn't have to deal with him for visits etc.

He is NON custodial and does not have free and clear access. The court has ordered that he have supervised time with his child, and there will be a schedule to go with that. He is bypassing the court order. He absolutely should not be there. The mom of this child needs to be notified ASAP, and the DCP needs to give her head a shake.

There is an awfully lot of assumptions going on in this thread about what rights the father has and doesn't have and the only input comes from a third party.

NOT someone I'd trust has the full story.
Unless like we suspected earlier in the thread....that the OP isn't who they are saying they are.

Still an awful lot of assumptions about what's going on and who has what rights. Each state and each custody situation is unique so there is no one black and white rule that applies here.