Spoiler Alert

[Mad_Pistachio]

I have never had a 3-year-old say that, but when a 6-year-old came running with "is it true Santa is not real?" I just basically pulled out the Wiki page about St. Nicholas (there is one in both Catholic and Orthodox traditions AFAIK) and read a sweet legend (again, not sure how true it is) about a guy named Nicholas who was giving presents for Christmas, even though celebrating it was prohibited, and was killed for that. I skipped what miracles are being attributed to him (something like bringing two boys back to life or something) as it was irrelevant, but she was pretty satisfied with explanation. yeah, okay, maybe Santa does not get into her chimney (they didn't have one anyway), and the gifts are from parents, but St. Nick was a cool dude, and in his memory - why not?

honestly, have no idea what to say to a 3-year-old. I got one myself, and I am not ready for her claiming that Santa is not real. (I grew up with no Santa, but the old man we've celebrated has such a nasty legend behind him, I prefer a guy in glasses and red jacket...)

[Unregistered]

I had one while back who told some of the other kids that Jesus wasn't real! We live in the Bible Belt, so you can imagine how THAT went over with the other kids parents.::

I had a Pentecostal child once that told all of the other children they were going to hell all the time. Like over the smallest things. I had to term, but like another poster I believe it was lazy parenting vs their "beliefs". I.e. "You didn't do your chores, you're going to hell" instead of just actually parenting. It was very disturbing to myself and the other parents, even though I knew the child didn't know what they were saying fully.

[Unregistered]

I can't imagine a parent excluding a child from being imaginative and creative. There are three ways to look at Christmas. As a religious belief, as a secular belief and as both.

Would a parent keep a child from going to Disneyland or watch the film Frozen because they feel it is not real?

Allow a children's mind to be free and creative. As the philosopher Geothe wrote: "See the world through a child's eyes". I wouldn't want to make a child look at the world through an adult's perspective.

Here is a good read: http://wallstreetinsanity.com/9-reas...a-childs-eyes/

You know, I think people will get mad for this, but I think part of this are people are too old when they start having kids. Like a 28-30 year old who comes in with a two year in my experience is more likely to sit on the floor and do a game or whatever the child is doing with them. Where as a 40 and older parent with a child under five is more likely to let them play alone or put them in front of an electronic. I've met so parents that I thought were the grandparents. They're raising little adults. It's so sad. I'm not saying having children after a certain is bad/wrong, but it's like any thing. If you're not fit enough, don't do it

[Annalee]

You know, I think people will get mad for this, but I think part of this are people are too old when they start having kids. Like a 28-30 year old who comes in with a two year in my experience is more likely to sit on the floor and do a game or whatever the child is doing with them. Where as a 40 and older parent with a child under five is more likely to let them play alone or put them in front of an electronic. I've met so parents that I thought were the grandparents. They're raising little adults. It's so sad. I'm not saying having children after a certain is bad/wrong, but it's like any thing. If you're not fit enough, don't do it

Maybe in some cases but not necessarily the norm....I had kids at age 35 and 37 (not by choice, just what was in the cards..I say don't ever give up....it can happen:....they are now 12 and 14.....and I play lots of sports and watch alot of ESPN....My extended family is like this as well....We were outside playing kickball, football, and basketball on Thanksgiving Day and cars were going slow on the highway watching.....ACTIVE family time may not be the norm for everyone, but we make every moment count....

[MunchkinWrangler]

I make it a point in my advertising and interviews that I celebrate all major holidays and seasons. I do bring up my religious beliefs but make it clear there is no teaching of it during my day with children. I do believe that a dose of magic is important because that's what being a kid is about. It's fun! I haven't encountered this situation yet but I hope to be able to handle it appropriately when it comes up. At least you're not getting any push or pull from the parents and that will make it easier.

[TwinMama]

Okay.....I'm sorry for bringing this back...but it's bugging me.

So...this little boy comes every day now and talks about how many presents he has under the tree and about all the stuff he's going to get. He's naming off the items like tow truck...etc.

I said,"Buddy. Just because you ask for presents though doesn't mean you'll get them though. Right??"

His response..."Yes it does!! I asked for it, and so I'll get it at Christmas."

Let Mom know about this in a joking manner by saying..."LOL!! He's so matter of fact that he's getting all of these things. He thinks just because he asked it means he's getting them."

Her response: "What a stinker. We put it on his list for all of our relatives, but who knows."

He also mentioned to me that he thinks Santa is still coming to his house. I didn't tell Mom this...

The other kids are getting the wrong idea. Mom's idea about teaching him the real meaning of Christmas and having 25 days of giving isn't working. In turn it's making more work for me to explain that it's not how it works.

Today he shows up and says,"I have 15 presents under the tree!!! I counted them!!!"

I get that's what kids do, but this was such an issue before I can't say....hey...you might not. I keep saying that's not what Christmas is about, but he says..."Well I'm getting them. I know I'm getting them."

I'm afraid if I tell Mom these are his responses she's going to think I'm being in her face about her way of celebrating. Which is absolutely not the case.

I'm trying to turn things around asking what are you getting everybody for Christmas type of thing.

What would you do?

[Blackcat31]

What would you do?

I'd simply not engage in ANY talk/discussion about Christmas.

To each their own. I have friends that literally do buy every.single.thing on the list that their children want.
Some years they have admitted to spending $1,000's so for some kids Christmas DOES work that way.

But if his Christmas talk is not fitting in with daycare/other kids then I would simply stop engaging in conversation with him about Christmas at all.

[childcaremom]

Okay.....I'm sorry for bringing this back...but it's bugging me.

So...this little boy comes every day now and talks about how many presents he has under the tree and about all the stuff he's going to get. He's naming off the items like tow truck...etc.

I said,"Buddy. Just because you ask for presents though doesn't mean you'll get them though. Right??"

His response..."Yes it does!! I asked for it, and so I'll get it at Christmas."

Let Mom know about this in a joking manner by saying..."LOL!! He's so matter of fact that he's getting all of these things. He thinks just because he asked it means he's getting them."

Her response: "What a stinker. We put it on his list for all of our relatives, but who knows."

He also mentioned to me that he thinks Santa is still coming to his house. I didn't tell Mom this...

The other kids are getting the wrong idea. Mom's idea about teaching him the real meaning of Christmas and having 25 days of giving isn't working. In turn it's making more work for me to explain that it's not how it works.

Today he shows up and says,"I have 15 presents under the tree!!! I counted them!!!"

I get that's what kids do, but this was such an issue before I can't say....hey...you might not. I keep saying that's not what Christmas is about, but he says..."Well I'm getting them. I know I'm getting them."

I'm afraid if I tell Mom these are his responses she's going to think I'm being in her face about her way of celebrating. Which is absolutely not the case.

I'm trying to turn things around asking what are you getting everybody for Christmas type of thing.

What would you do?

"You counted 15? Let's hear you count to 15."

I guess I would just smile and nod and redirect. Reallly would not get more involved than that. I would not be explaining what Christmas is or any thing too in depth because who knows how everyone celebrates the season at their house. I do not want/need/wish to incorporate it all at my house.

I wouldn't even be having these conversations anymore with him or mom.

[daycare]

everyone does christmas their own way and I love that.

i ask for all families to bring in something that represents their family traditions. It's all about where the family puts the focus. If it is on the presents, then that is where it is.

For my family, it is about eating together and building memories, so we all make crazy food. We have a family tradition of making this very yummy stuff (I only eat on christmas, but secretly want every day) which we call it reindeer poop, I don't even know what is in it, but it is the best taste in the world.

the adults dont exchange gifts, only we buy for the kids. ALL of the kids and there are a LOT of them.

there really is no right or wrong way to celebrate it, even if you choose not to celebrate it.

sorry, this got way off track.

[TwinMama]

There's no question about celebrating. If you read the previous posts you'll see mom and my discussions. Mom wants dcb to think a certain way about the season. The way he's talking does not reflect that. Is it my job to let him know or to let mom know that he's not getting her message?

Or do I just forget about it? Mom is the type that would also blame me for this kind of talk. As if I'm promoting selfishness. That's my biggest concern.

[daycare]

There's no question about celebrating. If you read the previous posts you'll see mom and my discussions. Mom wants dcb to think a certain way about the season. The way he's talking does not reflect that. Is it my job to let him know or to let mom know that he's not getting her message?

Or do I just forget about it? Mom is the type that would also blame me for this kind of talk. As if I'm promoting selfishness. That's my biggest concern.

If this were me, i would let it go. I would just say ok, and move on.

if dcm brings it up, I would say sorry we don't discuss that kind of stuff here. Insert big smile.

[childcaremom]

If this were me, i would let it go. I would just say ok, and move on.

if dcm brings it up, I would say sorry we don't discuss that kind of stuff here. Insert big smile.

[Blackcat31]

There's no question about celebrating. If you read the previous posts you'll see mom and my discussions. Mom wants dcb to think a certain way about the season. The way he's talking does not reflect that. Is it my job to let him know or to let mom know that he's not getting her message?

Or do I just forget about it? Mom is the type that would also blame me for this kind of talk. As if I'm promoting selfishness. That's my biggest concern.

Sounds to me like you are letting mom's issues be yours.

Let him talk however he wants then...I don't see how it matters?

If mom says one thing but the kid is saying another that reflects the opposite of what she is saying, then it sounds like she might be lying to you....

If mom blames you, I'd have no issues putting her in her place as far as what things you can and can't control in regards to her wishes for her child and the season.

I'd mind mine, and let DCM worry about herself and her child.

Teaching kids about family beliefs, Christmas and holidays traditions that are practiced at home have NOTHING to do with you.

[TwinMama]

Sounds to me like you are letting mom's issues be yours.

Let him talk however he wants then...I don't see how it matters?

If mom says one thing but the kid is saying another that reflects the opposite of what she is saying, then it sounds like she might be lying to you....

If mom blames you, I'd have no issues putting her in her place as far as what things you can and can't control in regards to her wishes for her child and the season.

I'd mind mine, and let DCM worry about herself and her child.

Teaching kids about family beliefs, Christmas and holidays traditions that are practiced at home have NOTHING to do with you.

Ok. Good!!! I just feel a certain responsibility with my dck's. I want them to learn good things, but at the same time I have to remember that I can't put it all on my shoulders.

Thank you!!!

[TwinMama]

If this were me, i would let it go. I would just say ok, and move on.

if dcm brings it up, I would say sorry we don't discuss that kind of stuff here. Insert big smile.

Love this...thank you.