Spoiler Alert

[TwinMama]

So my 3 year old dcb just said to me that Mommy and Daddy told him that Santa isn't for real.

I don't need him telling the other kids that. I think it's jacked that they tell him that when he's 3.

How do I approach this? I make a pretty big deal out of Christmas in general and I have a ton of Santa books and arts and crafts. Whatever they believe is their business, but I want my children to believe and the other kids believe too.

[rosieteddy]

When I had that problem at daycare I told all the children that different people believe different things .I would ask parents to speak to him about ruining the magic for other children.I would send a note home expressing your belief in the magic of Christmas. I did have a Jewish Family and we talked about the different beliefs......I told the children that of course they would get presents from their parents if they did not believe.

[Blackcat31]

Seems to be a common thing around this time of year for group care providers...

https://www.daycare.com/forum/tags.php?tag=santa+not

[TwinMama]

So he brought it up again and said,"Did you really see Santa?"

So I said..."He comes to our house honey, but different people believe different things."

He said, "Well hopefully he comes to our house this year."

I feel terrible for him.

[daycare]

I wouldnt play into it. last year one of the kids told all the others santa isn't real. I did not even respond and just said no thanks to her and we all moved on...

she said it again later and I just say no thanks and again moved on.

I chose to ignore it and it worked.

[Unregistered]

I am not all invested in the 'keep the Santa secret' since its a big silly lie but obviously I wouldn't ruin it for some other person's child. I just want to add to the conversation that if you ask dcm to talk to dck about 'not ruining the magic' for another kid, they will probably go and tell that other dck as fast as they can find them ... Don't think of an elephant, kid.. Kinda thing.

[Annalee]

We have this in my extended family...It usually just works itself out. The kids who are told there is NO santa do talk about it,but the kids that really believe think the nonbelievers are silly.:: It really hasn't been a big issue and I think that is largely because the parents just stay out of it.I think the more you tell a child not to talk about it the more they will want to tell what they think they know. Just my opinion.

[daycare]

I look at it like everything else that I feel is a parents place to tell them. I don't get into it, ask your parents.


Kids are going to hear this no matter what at some point and again it is the parents place to tell their child what they feel is right.

I stay out of it

[Controlled Chaos]

I treat Santa belief differences the same as I treat different religions. "You believe ____ that's interesting, my family believes/celebrates ____" we read books about Christmas and Hanukkah. If it becomes attention seeking, redirect.

[daycare]

I treat Santa belief differences the same as I treat different religions. "You believe ____ that's interesting, my family believes/celebrates ____" we read books about Christmas and Hanukkah. If it becomes attention seeking, redirect.

exactly this. I treat it no different either.

i sometimes just say ok thanks for sharing and we move on. I dont want to give it any value

[Play Care]

I treat Santa belief differences the same as I treat different religions. "You believe ____ that's interesting, my family believes/celebrates ____" we read books about Christmas and Hanukkah. If it becomes attention seeking, redirect.

Same here. I have family members who are Jewish so I try to be inclusive.
But years ago I had a little dcg whose family didn't do Santa/Easter Bunny, etc. Fine, but she announced it at the lunch table more than once that "Santa wasn't real" I did the "different families believe different things and that's okay" spiel. So Christmas came and went and of course she still got presents from family so that blew over. Easter comes around and she announces "the Easter Bunny isn't real!" Again, different families believe different things. Well, Easter isn't a gift giving occasion so on Monday when all the kids were talking about their Easter baskets, the girl starts crying because she didn't get an Easter basket. Of course the little DCB I had at the time blurted out "that's cause you don't believe in him!"

Honestly with this family I felt it was more about being too lazy to make/sustain traditions than the fact they felt they were "lying" to their kid. I also got the impression that her older siblings liked telling her inappropriate things for the shock value when she would blurt it out

[auntymimi]

I had one while back who told some of the other kids that Jesus wasn't real! We live in the Bible Belt, so you can imagine how THAT went over with the other kids parents.::

[TwinMama]

Same here. I have family members who are Jewish so I try to be inclusive.
But years ago I had a little dcg whose family didn't do Santa/Easter Bunny, etc. Fine, but she announced it at the lunch table more than once that "Santa wasn't real" I did the "different families believe different things and that's okay" spiel. So Christmas came and went and of course she still got presents from family so that blew over. Easter comes around and she announces "the Easter Bunny isn't real!" Again, different families believe different things. Well, Easter isn't a gift giving occasion so on Monday when all the kids were talking about their Easter baskets, the girl starts crying because she didn't get an Easter basket. Of course the little DCB I had at the time blurted out "that's cause you don't believe in him!"

Honestly with this family I felt it was more about being too lazy to make/sustain traditions than the fact they felt they were "lying" to their kid. I also got the impression that her older siblings liked telling her inappropriate things for the shock value when she would blurt it out

OMG...this made me laugh. Did you just want to kiss that little boys cheeks off for saying that?!?!

I in a way feel the same way. The parents tend to dump him off and get babysitters most weekends. It was him that I was excited most about making Christmas magical for. I have asked her 3 different times about Christmas and celebrating. I even asked her permission to do Elf on the Shelf. She said that he'd LOVE that. She should've let me know then.

Does this mean that I have to/should cut out all crafts and songs that involve Santa?

He said that Mommy told him that they believe in angels.

[Unregistered]

Here's a question: is the Jehovah's witness that doesn't make Christmas magical for their child being a better parent than the atheist who doesn't make Christmas magical for their child (which you think is just being lazy)? Honestly. Cause that's what it sounds like you're saying.

[Play Care]

OMG...this made me laugh. Did you just want to kiss that little boys cheeks off for saying that?!?!

I in a way feel the same way. The parents tend to dump him off and get babysitters most weekends. It was him that I was excited most about making Christmas magical for. I have asked her 3 different times about Christmas and celebrating. I even asked her permission to do Elf on the Shelf. She said that he'd LOVE that. She should've let me know then.

Does this mean that I have to/should cut out all crafts and songs that involve Santa?

He said that Mommy told him that they believe in angels.

I felt bad at the time, because it wasn't her fault.

But generally I think people should be careful about what they say to their kids. Instead of Santa isn't real, say "our family doesn't have Santa we do x y or z," instead.

Honestly, I don't believe in God, but I'd never announce or allow my children to announce there is no such thing. At the end of the day it's about manners/respect.