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  • Parents Won't Feed Their Child Enough

    The parents of a baby I watch refuse to supply enough food for the baby. He is starving halfway through his next scheduled feeding. I've told his parents this a few times and they just fuss with me and demand me to keep the feeding schedule they gave me. But he cries for about 1 1/2 in between every feeding no matter what I do with him.
    Last edited by permanentvacation; 12-16-2014, 01:03 PM. Reason: shortened info

  • #2
    Unless they are doing this for the child's medical reasons, I would feed the child more and keep it on the down low, I would probably even buy additional food (I am guessing formula or baby food), so they wouldn't notice you going through what they are providing quicker. My husband would shoot that plan to hell, but that would be my first instinct. Or you could offer the child table food at meals too if they are old enough and not say anything.

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    • #3
      I would not be OK with this. I personally provide formula (and infant food when they are ready). But, if the parents are providing it, I would not accept the child in the morning unless they have provided enough for the child.

      There is no reason for the baby to suffer through this. And, in group care, you cannot expect the children and the DC provider to have to listen to a hungry baby cry for extended periods. Not a good situation from any point of view.

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      • #4
        I've told both mom and dad a few times that they need to provide me more food/formula. They won't tell me what type of formula he is on, so I can't buy more formula. He won't drink plain water. I shouldn't have to spend my money (my rates are VERY low and I don't make much money as it is) on buying their child food when they are supposed to supply it. They have plenty of money, I just don't understand why they won't supply enough food. And I don't understand why they claim that the schedule they have him on works for him when, here, it clearly does not.

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        • #5
          I actually address this in my handbook - that for babies the parents must provide X amount extra each day.

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          • #6
            Originally posted by permanentvacation View Post
            The parents of a baby I watch refuse to supply enough food for the baby. He is starving halfway through his next scheduled feeding. I've told his parents this a few times and they just fuss with me and demand me to keep the feeding schedule they gave me. But he cries for about 1 1/2 in between every feeding no matter what I do with him.
            Infants should be fed on demand, NOT on a schedule. I would not let them bully you. Tell them at pickup today that the child is hungry and that you will not accept him into care tomorrow unless there is enough for him to eat. Then follow through. There is no excuse for his parents to not provide enough food or formula for him.

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            • #7
              The parents claim it's enough food for him and don't understand why I claim it's not. I just don't understand why the feeding schedule they claim they have him on doesn't work for him here.

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              • #8
                I fully believe in feeding a baby on demand as well. Which is why I have told the parents a few times that he needs more food here. They simply refuse to provide it. I guess I will have to buy him some containers of food myself. They won't tell me what formula he's on. But I do know what type of food they buy him and which foods he's already tried. So I could buy him more baby food. The thing is that I shouldn't have to. I have demanded that they bring me more food. The parents get really irritated when I tell them they need to bring more food. I am actually at the point of being afraid of pushing it any more because I'm afraid I will lose the child simply because I want them to provide more food.

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                • #9
                  He is probably more active and up more at daycare, it is a more stimulating environment. But it doesn't matter if that's the case or not. I would turn it around on them. If they say "I don't understand why he eats more here" reply with "I don't understand why you would risk your baby being hungry and why you don't trust the person you leave him with to tell you he his hungry. It breaks my heart to see him hungry. I will not accept him into care without ____oz of formula, for his sake". Then don't accept him without that much. You have to be firm.

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                  • #10
                    Or you could ask for a doctor's note confirming that the X number of ounces she brings for an X period of time is enough. I would also give him extra food and buy it even though you shouldn't have to. You could raise their rates but not tell them why. Just say the price of everything has gone up.

                    Just some suggestions.

                    Laurel

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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Laurel View Post
                      Or you could ask for a doctor's note confirming that the X number of ounces she brings for an X period of time is enough. I would also give him extra food and buy it even though you shouldn't have to. You could raise their rates but not tell them why. Just say the price of everything has gone up.

                      Just some suggestions.

                      Laurel
                      I would not be ok with this and tell them that unless there is a medical reason, then it is neglecting the child's needs. I would demand a doc note stating diagnosis before I would agree to anything.

                      What is wrong with these parents, this is silly.

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                      • #12
                        Originally posted by daycare View Post
                        I would not be ok with this and tell them that unless there is a medical reason, then it is neglecting the child's needs. I would demand a doc note stating diagnosis before I would agree to anything.

                        What is wrong with these parents, this is silly.
                        Me too. I figure if they are asked to have the doctor confirm it then they probably won't but will just bring more food.

                        Laurel

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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by Laurel View Post
                          Me too. I figure if they are asked to have the doctor confirm it then they probably won't but will just bring more food.

                          Laurel
                          ...sorry I was trying to agree with you and realized that my post sounded wrong... Glad you got it.

                          youre dead on...

                          children at this age should be fed on demand. I would not over feed or under feed unless I was told to otherwise by a doctor.
                          Last edited by daycare; 12-16-2014, 06:19 PM.

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                          • #14
                            Why are their wishes more important than the childís well being? I donít get it. You are willfully allowing yourself as a professional to be part of child neglect. If something goes wrong with this child it will equally fall on you.

                            I would speak to them and give them notice if they are unwilling to provide more food. Iíd equally make a call to CPS. Enough is enough. Recently I had a parent who wasnít giving me enough breast milk. I reminded her of our interview. I told her that if she is not producing enough, she has options.

                            1. Supplement the child with formula.
                            2. Quit her job and stay-at-home.

                            I told her I would not accept another drop off without enough milk. I told her to not feed this baby when he is hungry is equal to child neglect. I will not be an accomplish or take any part in not meeting a childís needs. This was at the end of the 2nd day the child was crying excessively. She chose #1.

                            It is 100% their child. It is 100% career suicide to go along with parentís inappropriate requests.

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                            • #15
                              Originally posted by daycare View Post
                              ...sorry I was trying to agree with you and realized that my post sounded wrong... Glad you got it.

                              youre dead on...

                              children at this age should be fed on demand. I would not over feed or under feed unless I was told to otherwise.
                              Oh okay ::

                              Laurel

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