My Father as Assistant?

[originalkat]

I know this may sound corny to some of you but, instead of becoming angry or frustrated with this guest poster, I think that he/she needs prayers to heal the heart instead. It is painfully obvious that somewhere in their lifetime they had a bad experience with men and they are now very emotionally scared from this. We have been blessed with wonderful fathers and husbands whom we trust and lean on so we don't understand this kind of lashing out.

Yes, I agree. Walking always in love. That is hard to do isnt it?

[Lianne]

I know this may sound corny to some of you but, instead of becoming angry or frustrated with this guest poster, I think that he/she needs prayers to heal the heart instead. It is painfully obvious that somewhere in their lifetime they had a bad experience with men and they are now very emotionally scared from this. We have been blessed with wonderful fathers and husbands whom we trust and lean on so we don't understand this kind of lashing out.

Not everyone prays or belives in a God. Praying for this person may be offensive to her/him if they don't believe and it's presumptuous to suggest others pray for them because others (myself included) may not believe in such things.

That said, I think the guest is trying to rile people up. And, much like I ignore a 2yr old's tantrum, I don't give an adult attention for attention seeking behaviour.

[fctjc1979]

Not everyone prays or belives in a God. Praying for this person may be offensive to her/him if they don't believe and it's presumptuous to suggest others pray for them because others (myself included) may not believe in such things.

That said, I think the guest is trying to rile people up. And, much like I ignore a 2yr old's tantrum, I don't give an adult attention for attention seeking behaviour.

Lianne, gbcc only suggested it. It wasn't a mandate. This board is full of suggestions that many people decide to ignore or argue against because they disagree. It's not presumptuous to make a suggestion, just as it's not unusual for you to argue against the suggestion because you disagree. I think if we all begin to shy away from making suggestions because it might offend someone, there would be nothing but silence. Someone, somewhere is going to be offended at something someone said.

[Former Teacher]

I think the guest is trying to rile people up. And, much like I ignore a 2yr old's tantrum, I don't give an adult attention for attention seeking behaviour.

I totally agree Lianne!

[Former Teacher]

I know this may sound corny to some of you but, instead of becoming angry or frustrated with this guest poster, I think that he/she needs prayers to heal the heart instead. It is painfully obvious that somewhere in their lifetime they had a bad experience with men and they are now very emotionally scared from this. We have been blessed with wonderful fathers and husbands whom we trust and lean on so we don't understand this kind of lashing out.

gbcc, I would agree with you ONLY if this person was a regular and/or registered. I have a hard time believing guests that come on here. No matter how painful or tearful or emotional the post is, I just don't believe half of them (if not all of them).

Again if this or any guest would have taken 2 mins (or less!) to become a regular then yes of course I would sympathize and lend a shoulder to cry on.

However I agree with the poster Lianne. IMO these "guests" are just out to rile us up no matter what the subject matter is.

[MarinaVanessa]

Wow, did I cuss you so why the nasty language? Because I disagree with you? ha.

I will say this though, the defense attitudes I've seen on here prove my point. No REAL man wants to change boys and girls diapers, rock them to sleep etc. UNLESS THEY ARE THE BIOLOGICAL FATHER OR .

Well it's a little obvious that their "BIOLOGICAL FATHERS" of the daycare kids are either not around because they have to work or because they can't or don't want to be so what's wrong with having a man help out in DC? Maybe you just don't know of any men that love kids besides their own but I do. Lots actually. My fiance helps out and the boys love to hang out with him. They prefer to play baseball with him vs playing it with me ... why? Your answer is as good as mine but I'm guessing that it's probably the same reason why the little girls prefer to play dress up and tea party with me than my fiance. And believe me he is not a "strange man" he just loves kids. Some men are naturals with them and I know plenty of men who are better fathers than the mothers are mothers. Just because someone is female doesn't mean they are pre programmed with parenting instincts just like because someone that is male automatically is strange and doesn't want to take care of kids.

BTW I know plenty of dads that wouldn't "change boys and girls diapers, rock them to sleep etc" even if they are his own but know plenty that wouldn't mind it at all. Just wondering what all this "no real man would want to" business is about and where these facts come from and how exactly the "defense attitudes" prove her point. Apart from all of the men I know that are great with kids (even those that are not their own) I also know alot of people that are so small minded that they talk and talk and talk and never say anything.

[momofboys]

Wow, did I cuss you so why the nasty language? Because I disagree with you? ha.

I will say this though, the defense attitudes I've seen on here prove my point. No REAL man wants to change boys and girls diapers, rock them to sleep etc. UNLESS THEY ARE THE BIOLOGICAL FATHER OR .

Personally I feel very sad for you that you have never experienced any love from a father-figure. I think it is VERY unfortunate in this day & age that you have such stereotypes for what a man can & can't do.

[Janet]

Male daycare provider

For the unregistered person who is stirring up the pot, I feel sorry for you if you think that biology matters when it comes to a man caring for children. One of my best friends has a child from a prior relationship and her husband loves him just as much as the kids that they have together.

I'm actually a fan of having male daycare teachers. I like the idea of having a male role model in the daycare setting for children, both girls and boys. I know that there's a stigma attached to seeing a male provider, but at some point that needs to stop. If we treat men that way, then how are we better than the men in the history who said that women couldn't do the work that men could do. It can't go both ways.

I think that most men who work in centers, are in the preschool/pre-K classes. I've never seen a man work in an infant or todddler classroom. In home daycares, I know plenty of husbands who will lend a hand when needed. My husband works 1st shift so he leaves shortly after my kids arrive. He may say "Hi" or he may talk to my 4mo dcg, but other than that, he only lends a hand if I ask him to.

Unregistered person, you are quite ignorant. I don't get you at all.

[Chickenhauler]

I know this post is old but as a parent I steer clear of any daycare setting be it home or center that has male employees. Just being honest. It's a big turn off. I interviewed a woman who seemed to have a nice home day care but was appalled when she mentioned her live in boyfriend is her helper. Your father is right to be worried in this day and world.

Sexist or just a man hater?

Are you serious in not knowing the difference between some strange MAN
being around kids verses their real father??? Wow. I am confused then too.
I think unemployed men should find jobs and not change little girls and boys diapers
but hey, what do me and millions of other women know?

Why can't a man be a daycare provider? And since when isn't being a daycare provider a job?

I'll admit, I avoid changing diapers at every opportunity available, but I had a great time working with a bunch of 5 yr old boys last week teaching them to ride their bicycles and trying to instruct them in the finer points of playing baseball (which was kinda like herding chickens).

I will say this though, the defense attitudes I've seen on here prove my point. No REAL man wants to change boys and girls diapers, rock them to sleep etc. UNLESS THEY ARE THE BIOLOGICAL FATHER OR .

IDK what you define as a "REAL MAN", but I can fix just about anything with an engine, can operate any piece of machinery on a construction site, have over a million miles experience in driving semi trucks, and my hobbies include racing motorcycles, hunting and gun collecting, restoring antique tractors, and home improvement.

But I still help out with my wife's daycare, and actually enjoy it sometimes. It's fulfilling to teach kids and see them grow and mature into respectable young adults.

My 'son' isn't my biological son, but I still read him stories and tuck him in at night.

[momofsix]

Well said Chickenhauler. My husband is not the bio father of our oldest daughter either, but he's her REAL dad, and we're both the REAL parents of our other 5 daughters, even the ones that are adopted
And he'll help out too and rock babies to sleep, play with the kids...all the stuff that real men do!