What Do You Do With A Child Who Won't Stay In A Child's Place?

[grandmom]

Oh Nannyde,

Thank you again. And thank you for including the link. I plan to memorize most of this article. It's so true.

[Hunni Bee]

Sad I missed this discussion.

But please don't be mislead . This little one has NO self esteem problems in my opinion. She is extremely outgoing, curious, and happy.

Her self esteem MAY be a little too high...as in the way she thinks that her self is the same as myself in running the classroom. I don't need another assistant, I don't need her to be "in charge" of the younger kids (I have a mixed age preschool group). I don't need her to tell me someone is hitting or running because like another poster said, I've already seen it. My job is to supervise.

All I need and want her to do is look after her own behavior and play with her friends. I don't think her self esteem would be harmed if she sticks to that.

I provide instances in which they can lead, make decisions, voice their opinions. However, I make a clear difference in the situations where I lead, and she resists that all the time. So she hears reprimands and is sent to time out day in and day out for being rude and in adults business.

So she needs this. So she can be happier.

[Hunni Bee]

However, in my house I make the rules and the little people follow. I am not overly concerned about self esteem.

IMHO, When this new trend of child development therorists started focusing so intently on self esteem was exactly when the train started derailing....

Exactly. I love this.

[nannyde]

Sad I missed this discussion.

But please don't be mislead . This little one has NO self esteem problems in my opinion. She is extremely outgoing, curious, and happy.

Her self esteem MAY be a little too high...as in the way she thinks that her self is the same as myself in running the classroom. I don't need another assistant, I don't need her to be "in charge" of the younger kids (I have a mixed age preschool group). I don't need her to tell me someone is hitting or running because like another poster said, I've already seen it. My job is to supervise.

All I need and want her to do is look after her own behavior and play with her friends. I don't think her self esteem would be harmed if she sticks to that.

I provide instances in which they can lead, make decisions, voice their opinions. However, I make a clear difference in the situations where I lead, and she resists that all the time. So she hears reprimands and is sent to time out day in and day out for being rude and in adults business.

So she needs this. So she can be happier.

http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/26184891/vp/12403895#12403895

At the two minute forty second mark............

[emmajo]

Maybe this doesn't quite fit with this thread, but I have a boy who sounds much like the OP's day care child on the days I have full enrollment. However, now there are a couple of days a week when he is only here with a much younger child (he's 4, other boy 1.) On those days when my numbers are down, the 4 year old wants me to play with him or to entertain him. Constantly. He's an only child who seems to be very involved with the adult world at home. Any suggestions about how to get him more involved with the other child ( nicely, besides tattling on him), even though he's younger, or more able to play w/ "big kid toys" without me always joining in, and less concerned with what I'm doing at every moment of the day (as in - sometimes I'd like to go to the bathroom without him hovering outside the door!) I don't want to lose him because he says he "has no friends to play with" or says he's bored here, but I cannot spend every single moment of the day making sure he's entertained. I'd like to help him become more independent and more sure of himself and his ability to entertain/occupy himself. Any suggestions are welcome!

[Meeko]

I'm sorry but I do not agree with this statement. My parents NEVER EVER EVER gave me choices like that as a child. I did as I was told and never thought for one second that I should of had a choice. I was the child, my parents were the authority. If I didn't like it I could grow up and move out.

....and if you knew me, you'd know I absolutely do not suffer from self-esteem issues or suffer from any lack of abilty to make committments.

I get the whole child-led curriculum approach and do agree with some of them.... well parts of them. However, in my house I make the rules and the little people follow. I am not overly concerned about self esteem.

IMHO, When this new trend of child development therorists started focusing so intently on self esteem was exactly when the train started derailing....

High five!

Over-indulgence is never the safe route to self-esteem. Today's kids are shining examples of it.