Minnesota Shutdown Impact

[Cat Herder]

I am a 30 year old single mother of two. My daughter turned 2 last week, and my son is 10 months. Their father and I split when I was pregnant with our son, and becoming financially independent has been struggle. With the states help, I have climbed my way out of food stamps and into management... continuing to move up, now with an opportunity to manage multiple locations of the company I work for.

I could not, and can not afford to work at all without childcare assistance. I do not know how I am going to handle this situation. I do not have family in town, and their father works full time as well. The cost to have both of my children in daycare is more than I make. But I have to work, for my own sanity. To provide for my children and to contribute to society. It fulfills me as an individual and I am good at my job.

I will be devastated if this shutdown pulls me away. As will my employers. Neither myself or my company can afford to lose even a week... And if by chance I can get my mom to travel this far to help me out, then my kids, especially my 2 year old, will miss her friends and teachers so much. They will be confused and it will throw them off entirely.

My life is hard. I am exhausted by 6pm every day, and still have 1.5 hrs of work before my kids are in bed. And another 1.5 after that cleaning up after them. I am happy though. My kids are happy.

I am so grateful for the assistance I have received to date. I pray, hands and knees, that the government does not shutdown. That I can keep working. And that I won't spend my entire savings to do so.

I am glad it has helped you get an education. I really am.

I also was a single mother of two, ironically my ex left when DS was an infant. I picked him , not the Government, it was not forced on me. It did not work out, I had to adjust. I understand how hard it is.

I put myself through school, created my own job so I could work AND care for my children without ANY assistance. I am also tired after 6pm, I also have to clean up after my kids every night after working 12 hour days.

My needs and personal fulfillment went to the back burner, I have kids and they come first. I made the decision to have them.

I had to live within my means. I don't understand how others cannot....:confused::confused:

What I really, really don't understand is why, after getting a job in management, you still need to be on the system that is supported by everyone elses taxes??? Please explain that to me.

[MommyMuffin]

Just had a story to share: I had a coworker who had 5 kids and kept getting pregnant and having abortions. She didnt make a lot of money and wouldnt move up the career ladder because then she would make too much money to keep her state help.

I was struggling trying to figure out how I could stay home and raise my daughter because that was the most important thing to me. I often wondered why she didnt just stay home with them. One say I asked her and she said she wouldnt stay home with her kids because they "drove her crazy."

I see the point of view of those trying to work but cant move up the ladder because of loss of help and those who stay home to care for their children.

The part I dont understand is why she kept having kids? They are real people with big needs.

Regardless, the shut down will affect many many people and it will make life hard for lots.

[Cat Herder]

When I needed help when I was just starting out I hated going to the government offices. I felt like they viewed me as scum and didn't want to give me any help. I was asked tons of questions and felt like they thought I was an idiot. It was a degrading experience and I hope to never have to ask for help again. I truly needed help and did get it and I got rid of it as fast as I could too. I can't understand why people would want to go through that over and over again in the same way I don't understand domestic abuse victims.

That is what it is meant to do and I am so glad you got on your feet. It feels amazing doesn't it???

I just hope it will still be around for those who REALLY NEED it. It could be any one of us at any time. We could be struck down tomorrow without the physical ability to provide for our children, you know?

That is what scares me. Disability, Social Security, Retirement and Life Insurance are not paying as well for many of the Veterans families and our Seniors. They are struggling while others are getting a free ride.

[dEHmom]

i don't mean to threadjack or nothing here, but I just wanted to say something that regards state paid (well i'm in Canada and it's not called that but social assistance).

I agree with some of the posts that have been submitted here.

It's a tragedy because so many will suffer, especially the children.

Here's some points that I think should be looked at or addressed when people are assistance...

1- smoker? ok, well if you can afford to buy cigarettes, then you don't need assistance. It ticks me off to think that tax dollars go to support a habit, when the money is supposed to be used for food and shelter, and providing clothing for the children.

2- top brand clothing? hmm, i don't even wear top name brand clothing, that's not fair. you don't need assistance.

3- get pregnant while on the system? sorry, get your ass to work. I personally know of at least 3 families that have done this. a single mom with 4 kids from different dads, one of which she has done 3 paternity tests and still no idea who the father of this boy is. she has a new child everytime her assistance is about to stop so she doesn't have to work, and doesn't have to pay for her daughters dance class, or sons hockey. And I know she has bought her kids every gaming system under the sun, yet she couldn't pay her sister in law and brother $25 for her childs bed? It was a brand new $500 bed and they only asked her for $25 and now they no longer talk because she says they are selfish to ask her to pay for the bed! Oh and she is a smoker!



It bothers me because I live on a tight income, barely making payments and putting food on my table. I luckily have a lot of family who buys tons of clothes for the kids every bday, easter, christmas etc. So they always have nice new clothes. I understand people on assistance most likely receive gifts like this, maybe even name brand clothing too, but I think if you receive a check from the government, you should have to keep every receipt, and if they choose to pull your file that month and verify that every dollar they gave you was used appropriately, so be it. But at least they would have some fear that they will have to show their spendings and maybe not spend it on unneccessary things.

I apologize if this is coming off harsh, and I realize resources would be a factor in the reasoning for not doing this, but honestly, the money the governments would save by doing this would probably equal millions a year. The Welfare, Social Assistance or State Aid programs are wasting money by allowing people who abuse it to continue.

[Blackcat31]

I am a 30 year old single mother of two. My daughter turned 2 last week, and my son is 10 months. Their father and I split when I was pregnant with our son, and becoming financially independent has been struggle. With the states help, I have climbed my way out of food stamps and into management... continuing to move up, now with an opportunity to manage multiple locations of the company I work for.

I could not, and can not afford to work at all without childcare assistance. I do not know how I am going to handle this situation. I do not have family in town, and their father works full time as well. The cost to have both of my children in daycare is more than I make. But I have to work, for my own sanity. To provide for my children and to contribute to society. It fufills me as an individual and I am good at my job.

I will be devestated if this shutdown pulls me away. As will my employers. Neither myself or my company can afford to lose even a week... And if by chance I can get my mom to travel this far to help me out, then my kids, especially my 2 year old, will miss her friends and teachers so much. They will be confused and it will throw them off entirely.

My life is hard. I am exhausted by 6pm every day, and still have 1.5 hrs of work before my kids are in bed. And another 1.5 after that cleaning up after them. I am happy though. My kids are happy.

I am so grateful for the assistance I have received to date. I pray, hands and knees, that the government does not shutdown. That I can keep working. And that I won't spend my entire savings to do so.

I think you have a great story and you sound like a good mom who is really trying to do right by your children (and yourself) to contribute to society and not abuse the system like so many others do. It is nice to hear these kinds of stories but I too wonder how come after working in a management position you are still needing assistance for childcare? Please do not say it is because child care is expensive because I am a childcare provider and techinically fall into the low-income bracket myself. I make less than some of the families I provide care for and although I do not apply for some of the services that are available to me, I do qualify.

I also find it rather odd that you are allowed to aquire a savings account while collecting assistance form the state which is tax payer dollars. I dream of a savings account, and retirement benefits, and health insurance, and any kind of benefits that most people who work recieve. Don't get me wrong, I am NOT complaining about the career I chose to work in and all the disadvantages that come with it (no paid sick/vacation/personal etc days). I just do not think that people recieving assistance should be allowed to smoke, drive expensive cars and or have a savings account while collecting dollars from other people who work just as hard!!

I do not have a savings account because I use those few "extra" dollars I have each month for medical expenses (my DH is an insulin diabetic), heat costs, food and general living and child care expenses RATHER than recieve any aid from the state. If I just collected assistance, I could use those extra dollars and amass quite a savings account instead. But I don't. I do not even get a tax refund. I pay money into the IRS each year because my DH and I are both self-employed.

I also completely understand the difficulties your children will have to endure if they cannot attend their childcare since most children do bond with their friends and caregiver, but I hope you do not think that your child care provider should just provide services for free while this whole shut-down is going on, because that would not be right at all. That is where the problem lies, IMHO, people are so concerned that the children are going to suffer the most by this (and I do think they will) but I have had many people act as if I am the one who is hurting them by NOT providing services to the families on assistance during this mess. As if it is somehow ME who is hurting the kids by saying I am not going to be paid so they cannot attend!?! :confused:

And dEHmom is right, every single one of my families on assistance smoke, drive cars newer than mine, have mnicured nails, own an iphone or blackberry their kids wear brand name clothing and they eat at McDonald's more than once a week! Several of the moms have one or more degrees that they earned and do not use. They have all taken vacations and 50% of the families I have on assistance have been to Disney Land (thanks to tax time!). To clarify, I am NOT saying all families on assistance are like this, I am onlytelling what I have personally seen in my decades of involvement with children, families and the assistance program.

I truely wish I had an answer that would fix this terribly flawed system of giving, spending, giving, spending but I have nothing. I do know that their does need to be some accountiblity with the families recieving assistance and there needs to be some rules and guidelines put into place. The system at its inception was for all the right reasons and yet today, many many generations later, the program is NOTHING in comparison to its original intentions. :confused:

If this shut down does occur, I will be out 85% of my income but I will NOT provide child care for FREE since I kinda feel like that is already what I do for a majority of these families.

[Unregistered]

Cuts to welfare

I am a sigle mom of two kids. I do receive child care assistance in which I am so grateful for. I have a good job and do not receive any other assistance including child support. I pay my own rent, buy my own food, I don't even receive discounts for school lunches. I am very proud to be independent but again, am grateful for the child care assistance. While I completely agree that changes have to be made, how about we start with drug testing to receive any kind of government assistance? I'm betting that could save us a lot of money!!

[Unregistered]

2 kids in full time care = more than a full time manager's salary after taxes

Yes, in many markets. Costs for childcare for my one child while I was in grad school were more than my rent. I know most posters here don't charge that much, but Check the facts. We are also in an era of unprecedented job loss. Nationally. Try looking for a job in your free time, just for fun. Not just applying - time consuming alone, but see how many you actually have to turn down in your experiment. Many qualified, recommended, educated folks are down and out.

Many states also encourage saving for emergencies - anyone can do it and SHOULD, but the amount IS reported and calculated into available resources. States also should have saved for emergencies, and contingencies like an unsettled budget.

Also, not paying withholding will leave you owing at the end of the year, and rob you of a child tax credit. Incorporate, pay in and you probably will do better than break even.

I don't understand why the childcare assistance is not available to parents willing to care for their own children, but unless jobs are created that cover the costs of rent plus childcare, the imbalance will remain.

If every single welfare mom opened a home daycare, where would we be then?

Frankly - if those moms had the choice, they could do a lot better by their children than the choices many of them face for care.

[MN Mom]

I understand the need, especially for single mothers trying to work. I know a few good, hard working, single mothers who couldn't survive without childcare assistance.

That being said...I hope the shutdown is a wake-up call for many of those families who abuse the system. They need a reality check...and FAST. You CAN live on very low income without assistance. I am living proof.

My husband makes 12.00/hour. I am a stay at home mom. We have 4 children, a house payment that we can barely make, utilities, food, and gas. I don't do WIC, I don't do food stamps, or get free healthcare (we pay 100/week for our own). We are just very very careful about how we budget our money.

We preserve a good portion of our own food, and get our pork from the farm (beef is a rare treat around here). My kids all wear hand-me-downs(a lot of them like new, and named brand). If they get anything new...it's shoes, underwear, and socks; or my mother will buy them a couple of outfits from Target. There are not a lot of extra curricular activities unless it involves academics or music. My oldest daughter plays violin, and my 2nd oldest will be playing flute next year. Sports are expensive...so they are out until further notice. My van is OLD, has rust (yay MN Winter roads), and has a lot of miles on her...but she runs good and gets me to where I need to go. We do NOT go to the doctor for every little fever or sniffle, or cough. I have to use very good judgement in regards to non-emergency visits. Yet...my kids are healthy, up to date on vaccines, and thriving.

Is it stressful? Heck yes. There are months where I am not sure how we are going to survive. Sometimes we have to play catch-up with the house payment to put food on the table. In the end, we always have food, we always have shelter, and most importantly we always have each other.

*addendum*
Many of you know from another (private) thread that I am a smoker (well in the process of quitting) and that my husband smokes. We do NOT pay for packs of cigarettes. If I had to pay 5 dollars or 6 dollars a pack...I would have quit along time ago. We make our own and both of us quitting will save us maybe 30 dollars a month due to not buying supplies.

[Cat Herder]

Yes, in many markets. Costs for childcare for my one child while I was in grad school were more than my rent.

I understand that, I do.

What I don't understand is why it is anyone Else's responsibility that you chose to have a child that you could not afford daycare for while in grad school that most of us could never afford. Why should your ambitions be any more important than anyone elses?

I am not trying to be ugly here. I am trying to wrap my head around why people feel that having a child is a right that the government (funded by the rest of us) is supposed to pay for. Having a child is a responsibility.

When I was in college I knew if I got pregnant that I would have to choose school or motherhood. That is why I chose birth control. Not using birth control when I could not afford a child would have been irresponsible and selfish.

What happened to personal responsibility for your own choices?? Getting pregnant is preventable and not mandatory.

[dEHmom]

Many of you know from another (private) thread that I am a smoker (well in the process of quitting) and that my husband smokes. We do NOT pay for packs of cigarettes. If I had to pay 5 dollars or 6 dollars a pack...I would have quit along time ago. We make our own and both of us quitting will save us maybe 30 dollars a month due to not buying supplies.

here the cheapest pack of cigarettes is $10!!!!!!!!!! unless you buy the 20 packs and those are 9.85/pack!

[dEHmom]

I understand that, I do.

What I don't understand is why it is anyone Else's responsibility that you chose to have a child that you could not afford daycare for while in grad school that most of us could never afford. Why should your ambitions be any more important than anyone elses?

I am not trying to be ugly here. I am trying to wrap my head around why people feel that having a child is a right that the government (funded by the rest of us) is supposed to pay for. Having a child is a responsibility.

When I was in college I knew if I got pregnant that I would have to choose school or motherhood. That is why I chose birth control. Not using birth control when I could not afford a child would have been irresponsible.

What happened to personal responsibility for your own choices?? Getting pregnant is preventable and not mandatory.

Amen!

I was 17 when I got pregnant with my daughter. Best choice? Nope. Best thing that ever happened to me? You betcha!

But we are 100% responsible for ourselves. Sure we've had some rough times, and people have helped us through. There are always times in everyones life where they need help. And there is nothing wrong with that. But having a child is no one elses responsibility financially or anything else. It bothers me when people have children just for handouts. Or when they EXPECT a handout because they've had children. Get over it.

Luckily in Canada we have free health care, and so we never have to fear those unexpected medical bills. But things like dental care and such are not free. A portion of it will be covered based on the type of treatment needed and your coverage.

But I agree with you Catherder, that pregnancy is preventable, it is a choice (usually) and people should not have a child unless they are ready, able and capable of providing for this child.

I also agree with the pp who said drug testing is a good starting point.I've said it many many times.

[MarinaVanessa]

I am a sigle mom of two kids. I do receive child care assistance in which I am so grateful for. I have a good job and do not receive any other assistance including child support. I pay my own rent, buy my own food, I don't even receive discounts for school lunches. I am very proud to be independent but again, am grateful for the child care assistance. While I completely agree that changes have to be made, how about we start with drug testing to receive any kind of government assistance? I'm betting that could save us a lot of money!!

I hardly if ever respond to unregistered comments but I have to in this case because I agree 100% with that comment.

I split with my DD's father when she was month's old and needed help. Her father refused to keep a job (like someone said earlier, I picked him ) and I was on WIC, foodstamps and cash assistance while I was pregnant because I had to pay our bills somehow. Once I gave him the boot I got child care assistance and got a job. In less than 6 months I was off of everything. I appreciated the assistance while I had it but that was what it was. Assistance, a hand-up not a hand-out. It made me so mad that here I was embarrassed that I was at the point that I needed financial assistance and was in a hurry to get off of it while the person next to me in the assistance waiting room, my neighbor, even some friends were on it also and drove new cars (I rode the bus or my bike), wore Jordans (I wore payless), their kids wore expensive clothing (my baby daughter wore hand me downs) etc. and you could smell the weed on them . I would have been more than willing to take surprised drug tests back then to keep my assistance and agree that if everyone would be required to take a drug test and pass it to keep their benefits we would save a ton of money. Assistance is not help to be used to pay someones drug habit.

[Blackcat31]

I understand that, I do.

What I don't understand is why it is anyone Else's responsibility that you chose to have a child that you could not afford daycare for while in grad school that most of us could never afford. Why should your ambitions be any more important than anyone elses?

I am not trying to be ugly here. I am trying to wrap my head around why people feel that having a child is a right that the government (funded by the rest of us) is supposed to pay for. Having a child is a responsibility.

When I was in college I knew if I got pregnant that I would have to choose school or motherhood. That is why I chose birth control. Not using birth control when I could not afford a child would have been irresponsible and selfish.

What happened to personal responsibility for your own choices?? Getting pregnant is preventable and not mandatory.

EXACTLY!! What she said! ^^^^^^^

I chose to parent my child when I got pregnant. I quit college because I could not do both...well I could have if I had applied for assistance but I got pregnant. ME. not the next door neighbor who works 10-12 hours a day to pay their bills. ME. (Well my DH too..LOL!) We took resonsibility for our child. We picked up extra odd jobs, so make an extra buck so our bills were paid, food was on our table and our lights and heat were on and working. We completely quailified for every type of assistance available but did not take any of it! ZERO. I gave up my dreams of going to college because I had a baby.

I recently went back to college for the first time. My baby that I chose to parent and give up college for is now 19 (almost 20) years old!! My DH and I also took our long awaited honeymoon in Feb of 2010. We've been married for 21 years!!!

To the same unregistered poster (that catherder quoted) who said, "I don't understand why the childcare assistance is not available to parents willing to care for their own children," are you kidding me???? Why should the government pay a parent to care for their own child???? I do not understand that rational at all. :confused:

You also said, "Many states also encourage saving for emergencies - anyone can do it and SHOULD, but the amount IS reported and calculated into available resources." The savings accounts that many of the welfare receipiants have are ONLY reported if they themselves report it.....of course if they report it, they will lose benefits so how many of them do you really think report it. The two parents I have who have savings accounts keep them in their children's names so the state cannot touch them.

...also thanks for the tax tips, but I do pay in quarterly and I do not recieve the child tax credit because my children are adults now. I still pay in because I am honest on my taxes and account for every penny I earn. I pay in because I do not try to manipulate the system and take write-offs that are not 100% legal and I apparently am capable of running a busy childcare on a very tight budget. The only advice my accountant ever gives me is that I should spend more. :confused: My DH and I have both built our own businesses from the ground up through hard work and personal respnsibilty. I am also paying my own way through college (minus a grant for one semester's worth of text books from the local CCR&R) despite being eligible for Financial Aid.

Being a responsible, contributing member of society is NOT difficult if people will just stop thinking everyone but themselves are responsible for their personal choices.



To MarinaVanessa; That is a PERFECT example of what assistance should look like. You used the hand up. You did not make it a way of life. :-)

[Country Kids]

I do know that just because you are in management does not mean you make the money. It depends what kind of management you are in and what company you work for on what you make.

I recently had a friend who went from working for a private company to working in a state job. Her salary was cut in almost half. You would think she would make more doing work for the state but no. She also didn't have a choice about staying with the private company because the company shut down. To get another type job in the field she was in she needed a degree and she never had one because she had worked her way up the company ladder.

I have had professional people that work hard at their jobs (working in banks, hospitals, and such) and guess what-they were on assistance. One lady's husband up and left her suddenly and the other one the dad wasn't in the picture.

So just because it sounds like you make alot of money by your job title that isn't always true. I know I make more than alot of people and doing childcare which is astonishing.

For the comment of getting pregnant while going to college and why not use birth control. I had a surprise pregnancy after having 3 children and I was on birth control so that is another thing that people shouldn't judge on.

I agree some of these people should not being getting help but do we deny the children also? Then you have the hard working people or the ones that have lost jobs and can't find another good paying job. Some of these people were doing just fine before all this recession thing so until you walk in their shoes we shouldn't be judging.

[MarinaVanessa]

For the comment of getting pregnant while going to college and why not use birth control. I had a surprise pregnancy after having 3 children and I was on birth control so that is another thing that people shouldn't judge on.

Ditto here too. I was on the shot and still got preggers .