New DM Is Turning Out To Be Difficult

[EntropyControlSpecialist]

I honestly would look to replace. A parent who can't trust your care is not a good parent to have. How long are you willing to pat moms hand and reassure her-because she may need a lot of it. I babysit children- not parents

I agree. We aren't paid enough to take care of a child AND their parent. Your updates throughout the day should be more than enough for Mom. If they aren't, then she's going to really struggle with care in general because many places don't do this. Sounds like she needs a center with a camera system installed so she can helicopter around the screen all day at work.

[Josiegirl]

I actually do send parents pictures everyday with an update on how their day has been. I am just not willing to document her sons whole day. My other parents get a couple of pictures one time a day with an update. I'm not sure how any provider could do their job properly if they have to document each child's day all day. That's just asking to much. I'm one person taking care of four kids.

I totally agree but I would think dcm would be happy just seeing her happy baby once a day, might make the day go by quicker for her.
I've always told my dcps they can call any time they want to check on their kiddos and sometimes they do. I don't have a phone that takes pictures.

[EntropyControlSpecialist]

I know as time-consuming and annoying as it must be to send pics or text to dcms such as this one, some of you must see it from their POV too? Or am I the only one? Their arms must be feeling pretty empty after leaving their precious baby with someone else all day, esp. after having stayed home for 8 months. I know I could not do it which is why I started in dc. It must rip their hearts out.

I get it, to a certain degree, and send pictures as I'm able to through the Brightwheel app of the 12 children here daily. However, having a parent demanding documentation of various things (NORMAL things...) seems odd to me and I'd be uncomfortable. None of my parents demand photos. They simply appreciate them.

[MunchkinWrangler]

I know as time-consuming and annoying as it must be to send pics or text to dcms such as this one, some of you must see it from their POV too? Or am I the only one? Their arms must be feeling pretty empty after leaving their precious baby with someone else all day, esp. after having stayed home for 8 months. I know I could not do it which is why I started in dc. It must rip their hearts out.

I get it, I'm terrible with leaving my ds. I am going to try my best to be a good daycare parent.

It helps when you get a pic or update but I think it is important for dcm to let go. This is new and hopefully she will adjust and become less nervous. It's the anxiety of not being able to be in control of your child. I totally agree with you Josie.

[MunchkinWrangler]

I get it, to a certain degree, and send pictures as I'm able to through the Brightwheel app of the 12 children here daily. However, having a parent demanding documentation of various things (NORMAL things...) seems odd to me and I'd be uncomfortable. None of my parents demand photos. They simply appreciate them.

I agree, in no way should dcm be going overboard with the control issue during the time at daycare. I mean, that is just too anxious.

OP, I definitely think you should ask pointed questions when suggestions or inquiries are made by dcm, to help you dive in to what exactly is bothering her. The communication will allow you to show your experience and help dcm trust more. But after a couple months of this, if she doesn't start to let go, it doesn't get any better.

[Ariana]

Oh I totally get where this parent is coming from...so much so I left my career and stayed home

[Unregistered]

I use to send pictures to the very first family I enrolled to update mom on her little ones day and she rarely acknowledge that she got them. I took it as I was bothering her at work so I stopped. When I first started using the bright wheel app I would upload pictures to each child's account but that was too time consuming and not how I wanted to use what little time I had for down time to do so. Now I upload all pictures on my Facebook page. I let parents know if you want to see pictures of ur little ones your welcome to like my Facebook page. I only have 1 mom who does not want her child on the internet so she doesn't get picture updates. I have entirely too much to do to be sending picture updates to each family. I miss my little ones while their at school and guess what I don't get photo updates from their teacher.

[Unregistered]

Oh I totally get where this parent is coming from...so much so I left my career and stayed home

Then this is what she should do. Not meaning to come off as rude but I always get a chuckle when I read providers saying they quit their jobs because they didn't trust anyone with their kids. It's funny because now you are a provider expecting someone to trust you to care for their children. 😂

[mommyneedsadayoff]

Then this is what she should do. Not meaning to come off as rude but I always get a chuckle when I read providers saying they quit their jobs because they didn't trust anyone with their kids. It's funny because now you are a provider expecting someone to trust you to care for their children. 😂

I think that is the irony. I don't trust others to care for my kids, so I care for other people's children so I can make it possible to care for my own. It does not take away from the trust factor. If you don't trust me to watch your cild, I will not watch your child. It may be asking a lot of a parent, but they are asking quite a lot of me as well. Just because a small amount of money is exchanged, does not mean that I do not hold a higher burden in the end. Money can be found many other places, but finding a provider you can trust to raise your baby...priceless. And for those of us who couldn't find one or did not want to...we offer that service to other parents.

[Mike]

Then this is what she should do. Not meaning to come off as rude but I always get a chuckle when I read providers saying they quit their jobs because they didn't trust anyone with their kids. It's funny because now you are a provider expecting someone to trust you to care for their children. ��

That's how many businesses are started. You don't want to pay someone else to do something, so you do it yourself and offer the services to others.

Nobody can fully trust someone else in anything, especially when it comes to your own children, but everyone has choices to make and some choose to let others provide the services, and hope they made the right choice.

My father got into auto mechanics, many years ago, because he didn't like the work mechanics did on his car. I got into home renovations because I couldn't afford to pay someone to do my fixing. Some people will quit their job and start a daycare because they don't want to leave their kid with someone else. Some people will leave their kid with someone else because they like their job, or they need the extra income, or in some cases, they just want that break from their kids.

[Josiegirl]

I use to send pictures to the very first family I enrolled to update mom on her little ones day and she rarely acknowledge that she got them. I took it as I was bothering her at work so I stopped. When I first started using the bright wheel app I would upload pictures to each child's account but that was too time consuming and not how I wanted to use what little time I had for down time to do so. Now I upload all pictures on my Facebook page. I let parents know if you want to see pictures of ur little ones your welcome to like my Facebook page. I only have 1 mom who does not want her child on the internet so she doesn't get picture updates. I have entirely too much to do to be sending picture updates to each family. I miss my little ones while their at school and guess what I don't get photo updates from their teacher.

But I bet your little ones in school aren't 8 mo.

[Josiegirl]

Then this is what she should do. Not meaning to come off as rude but I always get a chuckle when I read providers saying they quit their jobs because they didn't trust anyone with their kids. It's funny because now you are a provider expecting someone to trust you to care for their children. 😂

I stayed home with my kids and started dc, not because of any trust issue but because I would've missed them so much and they're only little for a brief time.

[Unregistered]

But I bet your little ones in school aren't 8 mo.

No they're not but I miss them all the same.

[Heart12]

Personally, I would not have allowed DCM to "observe" me with the children because IMO that just opens the flood gates. Which is what it sounds like is happening to you. :hug:

I have a DCB who started at 4mo old. DCM is a teacher & asked if she could come by for a few hours & I said No. Then she started asking if I could let her know when we would be going to the park, because she would like to meet us there. I said sure, but never called. DCB had a REALLY rough start, & I really thought I was going to end up terming. I remained nice but firm with these parents, & even sent DCB home on DAY 1!!! But, the parents respected me & at least tried any advice that I had. Things got better & now they are one of my favorite families!

[hgonzalez]

I have had the unfortunate experience with a parent like this. Nothing I could ever do was good enough. My other parents were completely on board with my policies; she had to question them all. She wanted special accommodations for her children. They ended up leaving without paying me after a very heated phone call.

I would say replace when you can, as she will never trust you.