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Diplomacy is key!
Like some of the others, I too can kinda see how the mom could have been offended by these questions. I don't think that it was so much as rude as it was... a bit overwelming. Like she said she doesn't feel "comfortable with being interrogated" some of those questions can come off as kinda harsh and even desperate on paper (or E-mail in this case). Like some of the others I also thought that she was sending the 1st part to you and I was thinking "man that's weird and kinda rude to ask someone who has an ad for open daycare spots those questions, its like she is fishing for daycare advice from you" it didn't sound quite as bad when I realized that it was the other way around but it was still sounded a little off. The fact that you asked it in writing on the internet without her getting a chance to respond to you first kinda feels impersonal and can make them feel bombarded and pressured to answer these which can make them feel vulnerable. Putting all of these questions bunched up like that in writting can look overwhelming and cause you to put your defenses up.
Since you were answering HER ad instead of her answering YOUR add I think slow and steady wins the race just ask her if she can talk on the phone or give her your number. Saying "If you are interested in meeting with me, I have a few questions for you" kind of does seem a little off-putting and wouldn't make me interested either. I think those questions and your family history can wait until you are better aquanted and seem like you are more interested in if their family would fit in with your program than if your program fit the family (even if it is true to some point you have to make them feel like they know they would like your program). Some people may like the fact the you seem open to giving your information out like that but some can be like "O my gosh she is talking about her family but isn't asking me about my family" (though I understand that she posted an ad and probably put her information in the ad). Also a little mystery is a good thing, grabs attention and makes them want to know more about you. You have to remember that not only are you interviewing her but SHE is interveiwing YOU as well, and SHE has to make the final decission!
They may be things to ask on the phone or at an interview because they sound better in person or spoken with some spacing in between the questionings and it allows them to give you the answers and if you phrase them right you may not have to ask some questions because they will fill comfortable giving you more information. such as:
U: "So, tell me about your Family."
PDCP: "My name is Linda, I am a dental assistant and my hubby Bob is a nurse; we have 2 children: Bobby is 1 and Suzy is 5. Bobby is a very happy baby and Suzy is in kindergaten and she loves to dance, sing, and read."
U: "Have Bobby and Suzy been in a daycare center or family child care before?"
PDCP: "Yes, we were at a center for about 4 months after I went back to work, but just left our center because we didn't like their program, so we decided to try family child care"
U: "Just out of curiosity, what about their program didn't you like?" let them answer "Thank you for letting me know that, I will keep that in mind. Was their anything about their program that you did like?" let them answer "Do you prefer bigger play groups or smaller play groups for your children?"
It's all about the phrasing and spacing; which is better left said rather than written. When it comes to parents you need to be diplamatic so they are less likely to take advantage of you and know that you are serious about what you do. Honestly some families just want child care and aren't interested in your family or personal life, but many will probably show more interest after they get to know you. Some personal things should be more about just answering what they ask and asking them about themselves so that they feel you are genuinly interested in having the family in your program. You have too keep a professional image to survive in this business because word of mouth can make or break your business!
Originally posted by Breezy
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Since you were answering HER ad instead of her answering YOUR add I think slow and steady wins the race just ask her if she can talk on the phone or give her your number. Saying "If you are interested in meeting with me, I have a few questions for you" kind of does seem a little off-putting and wouldn't make me interested either. I think those questions and your family history can wait until you are better aquanted and seem like you are more interested in if their family would fit in with your program than if your program fit the family (even if it is true to some point you have to make them feel like they know they would like your program). Some people may like the fact the you seem open to giving your information out like that but some can be like "O my gosh she is talking about her family but isn't asking me about my family" (though I understand that she posted an ad and probably put her information in the ad). Also a little mystery is a good thing, grabs attention and makes them want to know more about you. You have to remember that not only are you interviewing her but SHE is interveiwing YOU as well, and SHE has to make the final decission!
They may be things to ask on the phone or at an interview because they sound better in person or spoken with some spacing in between the questionings and it allows them to give you the answers and if you phrase them right you may not have to ask some questions because they will fill comfortable giving you more information. such as:
U: "So, tell me about your Family."
PDCP: "My name is Linda, I am a dental assistant and my hubby Bob is a nurse; we have 2 children: Bobby is 1 and Suzy is 5. Bobby is a very happy baby and Suzy is in kindergaten and she loves to dance, sing, and read."
U: "Have Bobby and Suzy been in a daycare center or family child care before?"
PDCP: "Yes, we were at a center for about 4 months after I went back to work, but just left our center because we didn't like their program, so we decided to try family child care"
U: "Just out of curiosity, what about their program didn't you like?" let them answer "Thank you for letting me know that, I will keep that in mind. Was their anything about their program that you did like?" let them answer "Do you prefer bigger play groups or smaller play groups for your children?"
It's all about the phrasing and spacing; which is better left said rather than written. When it comes to parents you need to be diplamatic so they are less likely to take advantage of you and know that you are serious about what you do. Honestly some families just want child care and aren't interested in your family or personal life, but many will probably show more interest after they get to know you. Some personal things should be more about just answering what they ask and asking them about themselves so that they feel you are genuinly interested in having the family in your program. You have too keep a professional image to survive in this business because word of mouth can make or break your business!
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