Knowing When to Leave The Industry

[Second Home]

I have felt burn out many times in the 17+ years of home daycare. I have noticed that it usually begins when there is a difficult child or parent. When that family leaves it does get better .

[Annalee]

I have contemplated many times just quitting and doing so quickly. However, someone always talks me down as there is no way I can make what I make now, nor have the vacation time I have, nor be able to meet obligations I have outside my home, nor would I survive working for someone else...

My daycare friends that have quit tell me you don't realize the stress you are under with daycare until you don't do it anymore, but none of them have stuck with the job they quit for and generally remained searching as they have trouble finding their niche.

The ones who tried to go back into daycare never seemed to be able to build back what they had???

It's a 50/50 shot I guess, but, like I said, some days I still think this is just too much....I have been in business 28 years this year; and have completed a QRIS assessment for 20 of those....for the first time in 20 years I will go into the new year not thinking about that half-day assessment. Mine was always the first of the year and it is all I would think about during my Christmas break. So happy about that! There is an assessment, but now done by my licensor and I choose one of four items; get it, I CHOOSE! Makes it much better and more attainable....no more FCCERS-R. happyface

[Ariana]

I have been closed since March and even though I knew I was stressed I honestly had no idea until I closed. I figured after a while I would miss it, feel rested and ready to go back but every time I think about opening I am filled with a sense of dread. Increasing my rates and setting boundaries didn’t work for me. I still had stressful parents to deal with day in and day out. The constant reiterating policies and explaining things, parents who want to push boundaries and lie to your face, kids with developmental issues and parents in denial.... I really do not miss it!!!! I do miss the routine and feeling of purpose and I do miss the gobs of $$ but money isn’t everything!!!!

[Annalee]

I have been closed since March and even though I knew I was stressed I honestly had no idea until I closed. I figured after a while I would miss it, feel rested and ready to go back but every time I think about opening I am filled with a sense of dread. Increasing my rates and setting boundaries didn’t work for me. I still had stressful parents to deal with day in and day out. The constant reiterating policies and explaining things, parents who want to push boundaries and lie to your face, kids with developmental issues and parents in denial.... I really do not miss it!!!! I do miss the routine and feeling of purpose and I do miss the gobs of $$ but money isn’t everything!!!!

I have been quarantined almost two weeks so I have worked in the daycare and really like my setup and have some ideas in my head of what I want to do when the kids come back. MY problems is it will not go like I planned and that's hard for me. I do LOVE what I do and I'm good at it...not being prideful; just saying. Only thing is I am over-passionate and put so much into it, it is hard for me to get going again when what I have planned doesn't go as I planned due to some parent, or a kid or a state interruption, etc. Make sense? I need to be better at letting things go, but I'm an OCD Type A personality and just not in my blood so

[Josiegirl]

I retired the end of May 2019. I felt depressed all the time, didn't feel like I had anything left for the children. I wasn't doing them any good and my whole body was breaking down, physically and mentally.
Through-out all my dc years(37 yrs.) I had so many ups and downs, so many periods of burn-out, but somehow I always found my way back to it, whether with more interesting workshops, peer conversations, being on this forum, whatever it took to get through those dark days. But I knew last year had become different and more difficult. Plus all the extras the government always wanted from us was difficult to take.
I'm 67 now and know, in my heart, I did what was better for myself and all the kids.

I hope you can figure out what will help you find more joy in your life, for yourself and your friends/family. Wishing you much luck in your decision!!!

As a side note: I cannot imagine what it's taking *now* to get through each day with any sanity intact.

[Unregistered]

Centers or in-home?

I work in a center and have for nearly a decade. I felt close to burn out before but this time feels different. We are soo short staffed and can no longer have any days off and one worker leaving it’s going to be more intense stresswise. I dread getting up for work and the noise the kids make is getting to me. I wanted to get some perspectives from people who have been there and left the profession.

[rosieteddy]

First I want to say sorry you are feeling stressed .This year is a tough one ,kind of like February after a tough winter.We used to joke "never make big decisions in Feb." I took a leave from D.C to care for family members (Alzheimer's and special needs).I closed for close to 3 yrs .I then tried a center as an infant toddler teacher (not for me).I was even a nanny.Then finding myself longing to restart D.C reopened with a different contract. I think in some ways you need to sit back and decide what you need.I wanted money of course ,as someone said being home has advantages. I started back with a better understanding of what I wanted for quite a few years it was good.It is hard to decide ,this year has been unbelievable, Pandemic is certainly nothing any of us lived through .Maybe use that to take a break until spring. That way you can kind of gage money,health and family wise how you stand.I would keep all credentials up to date ,not close but due to covid quarantined.You may find you want to move on ,or that you just want to restructure.This is a difficult time for people .I finally retired after a heart attack in 2015. Truthfully I somewhat wished I had just taken 6 months and reopened for a few more years. Being home is'nt all its cracked up to be. Good luck its a hard decision.

[Snowmom]

I wasn't doing them any good and my whole body was breaking down, physically and mentally.

This was a big one for me too. I'm in my 40's. This job has been directly responsible for 4 hospitalizations for me. The MRSA infection (99.99% sure I contracted it from one particular family) almost killed me 3 years ago. Plus pneumonia twice in the past 5 years. Now cancer (not daycare's fault obv).
No amount of strict illness policies can weed out the nasty of this job. The illnesses I've had because of it have morphed into a complete phobia for me.

I work in a center and have for nearly a decade. I felt close to burn out before but this time feels different. We are soo short staffed and can no longer have any days off and one worker leaving it’s going to be more intense stresswise. I dread getting up for work and the noise the kids make is getting to me. I wanted to get some perspectives from people who have been there and left the profession.

IMHO, center care is always more demanding than in-home. Answering to not only families, but a director, plus licensing and the center employee policies is too much to keep employees long term.
Why not think about in-home? You have the experience! Plus, you can dictate your policies, choose your clients, demand the time off whenever you choose to schedule it. It's obviously less secure, but can be more lucrative too.

If not, for SURE demand time off. Not having down time is extremely unhealthy.

[tenderhearts]

I actually have contemplated it many times. Yes vacations, extra time off does help however I still wonder. One of the BIGGEST things holding me back is doing a decent resume and cover letters after doing daycare for 20 years. I just don't know where to begin with all that. Another thing that scares me about leaving is finding a decent paying job

[Josiegirl]

I have an interview tomorrow- complete career change.

How do I know I want to leave:
1. I dread opening my doors in the morning.
2. I have no desire to do activities beyond what's necessary to get through the day.
3. I fight the urge to tell off parents nearly every day- and I do not care in the least if I hurt feelings or if they pull.

Pretty much... I've 99% checked out.

If I don't get this job, I'll pull in that 1% to soldier on for a bit longer. I'll take extra time off and hold off new enrollments until I figure it out.

Good luck with your interview! Sounds like you've been through the wringer the past few years. Hope you find something you love more and causes you less stress/illness.

[Unregistered]

IMHO, center care is always more demanding than in-home. Answering to not only families, but a director, plus licensing and the center employee policies is too much to keep employees long term.
Why not think about in-home? You have the experience! Plus, you can dictate your policies, choose your clients, demand the time off whenever you choose to schedule it. It's obviously less secure, but can be more lucrative too.

If not, for SURE demand time off. Not having down time is extremely unhealthy.

Unfortunately I am not in the position to open my own home child care center as the place I’m renting isn’t child friendly. I am thinking more about careers that are a nonprofit making a global impact. I just wanted to see if anyone regretted quitting daycare.

[Former Teacher]

Unfortunately I am not in the position to open my own home child care center as the place I’m renting isn’t child friendly. I am thinking more about careers that are a nonprofit making a global impact. I just wanted to see if anyone regretted quitting daycare.

To answer your question about regrets....my answer is NO. I am still in the child care field. However it's ONE family. I have no boss, other than the little human(s) and/or furry loves.

I still do what I love doing-teaching, crafting etc. And I am getting paid BIG. happyface

I wish you the best of luck.

[MelissaP]

I'm finally giving notice to all my families on Friday. I've only been doing this for the past 3 years and I'm so burnt out. I have one family that is the worst. I wake up every morning asking god why. I want to tell my families to f themselves. Especially 2 families whose children have some pretty apparent special needs and are just straight out denying it. One walks on her tiptoe all the time (almost on the tips of her toes), has very limited speech and is completely delayed. Mom says she can't afford the special braces to get her flat footed. I get it, I've been broke but at some point, you need to make some decisions on what is best for your child. Plus, your broke because you smoke... the other little boy, he's a great kid but there some serious ADHD and the parents (momma mostly) babies the crap out of him. Says he's super smart and well advanced beyond his 3 years... which is a load of crap. And they drop him off at opening and leave him here until closing. Today Dad had to go home quick before picking him up and didn't get here until 4:50. Every day, same thing over and over. Plus.. there's a baby sister (10months). I'm just so sad for him.
I can't do this anymore. My ethical and moral beliefs can't do this anymore. I have policies for a reason, which include that I am not a hired hand and everyone treats me like it. I'm done.
I did get a job that starts November 30th at a local center. Which I don't want to do but it will suffice for now. With that being said, I do have some other applications out there and have done some interviews with some other companies. I'm hoping those pane out but I am not holding my breath. I've been out of "real" work for 3 years and it would be a career change into customer service which is actually something that I love.
My husband is home all the time now, along with my school aged children, and that's what really brought it home for me. I, and them, are tired of the noise and the distractions from what needs to be done. My husband is an IT Engineer and needs to be in an "office" type of environment. And of course my kids are in school but doing it at home.
Everything is just pointing this direction and I'm ever so grateful.
I told my husband the other day that it's probably how he felt with his sail boats.. the best day of your life is when you open. And the next best day of your life is when you close.
Good luck to you and your future. If you are asking this question.. maybe you already know the answer. <3

[AmyKidsCo]

My mom has always said that you need to be running TO something, not running FROM something. So if there's something else you want to do more, go for it! If you just don't like what you're doing but don't know what you'd do instead, maybe take some time off, see what you can do to make it something you do like, or see what you might like instead.

[Country Kids]

I was completely burned out I think before covid started. Then March happened.......family issues, covid, loss of income even though I kept my childcare open, my own children moving home and the list goes on. I was stressed but in a different way.

Summer happened then here we are in fall, we become empty nesters, wildfires are threatening us, I'm helping 6 children distant learn BUT I'm not truly, truly stressed. I'm loving the distant learning, having my school agers and only 3 preschoolers. Everyone then goes back to school and its just not the same. Our little family is broken up!

What I have realized though through all of this my stress level isn't the same as it was before covid, I don't dread my job anymore, I actually am back to enjoying it and why? I think because when covid started, I lost one of my children that was harder and that made all the difference in the world! I also went from 10 down to 2 for like a month and that was nice.

See what the stress is and if it truly is the job all around, then yes it is time to move on. If it is certain aspects of the job see if you can change them. Make the job work for you, not you work for the job.