I Feel Like I'm Going Insane!

[Justjoy]

I've had this DCB in my care since August. He is now 22 months old and getting worse by the day! He literally bounces off the walls all day long, has no attention span, and he's very destructive. I thought his behavior may improve with age, but it's only getting worse. I have to lock my two small dogs away all day because of him hitting and kicking them constantly. Today while I was feeding his baby sister, he unlocked my front door and was running around in the snow barefoot. A little later I put him down for a nap in a crib. A few minutes later I went to check on him and he had all the bedding thrown all over the room and had somehow gotten my drapes and curtain rod down. There is no way he can reach the drapes from his crib so I thinking he must have been smacking the drapes with a blanket. These are not isolated instances and only a couple of what has gone on today and what goes on everyday.
I inform the parents of these instances and they just laugh and say, " He's got a lot of energy."
I honestly don't know how much longer I can deal with this! He's M-F ....9 1/2 hrs a day

[Blackcat31]

Invest in some heavy duty baby gates that restrict his access to things off limits....like outside. That could be a huge liability on your part so I'd seriously consider getting the best gates you can find.

I would also restrict his access to toys and equipment he can throw, ruin or be harmful to and with.

Soft toys and lots of access to exercise and fresh air when possible. Provide an area where he can be wild...especially if you live in an area that has cold temps and cant always get outside.

You can teach him how to be gentle with lots of role modeling and reminders. At 22 months that really is kinda normal for some kids.

I suggest you amp up your patience and engage in some activities that spend his energy as well as some activities and opportunities to teach him gentle touch and observation of when it's time to be crazy and when it's time to calm down.

It IS exhausting but with some time, patience and alot of role modeling and redirection it's doable.

My own kid was like that so I totally empathize. :hug:

Just thank the Lord he goes home every day... ::

[Ariana]

How many kids do you have? To me this sound like lack of supervision plus wanting attention. I don’t know how he was able to do any of those things with adequate supervision.

Sorry

[Justjoy]

How many kids do you have? To me this sound like lack of supervision plus wanting attention. I don’t know how he was able to do any of those things with adequate supervision.

Sorry

Ok... How about I send him to your house for a few hours. Then we can compare notes ::

[mamamanda]

I have one almost exactly like this so I feel your pain. He is my nephew which I think makes it easier to deal with on some level. Unfortunately I learned the hard way just how thoroughly attentive I have to be. Long story, but one minute w/o supervision (I was laying the infant down in the nap room) led to what could very easily have become a medical emergency. I phoned poison Control immediately for help & everything turned out ok. We are so incredibly blessed & I am very thankful that he is ok. (He had ingested children's ibuprofen).

He climbs everything, jumps off anything he can find to stand on, puts everything in his mouth, is harsh & aggressive often (though he also has a sweet side), & yes has pulled my curtain rod in the nap room off the wall & broken several toys including a new toddler trampoline when he tried to climb the net enclosure.

I found that although all children need constant supervision, he needs it times 10. ::
So like black cat said, everything I have is gated off. Baby proofing to the nth degree. Get on your hands & knees & look around each room he will be using & see it through fresh eyes at his level. What can you put away & minimize to get through this season (it is a season even if it doesn't feel like it.) ? Downsize toys, more baby friendly toys. Have activities for him to do while feeding the baby. Example: basket of toys/books/stickers/etc that only come out at feeding time & he has to sit beside you to play with them. Take all extra bedding out of his bed & only leave the necessities. He can earn back the extras. Practice being gentle with stuffed animals, petting/feeding/loving etc. Praise the positives you see as he improves.

We have 2 play rooms but we're only using one until he's a little older to save stress & clean up. I hope it gets better for you soon. It is rough but these kids desperately need someone to set firm boundaries & teach them. It's hard work, but I love having him. He loves me too & asks for me when he's not here. If you can be that person for this little guy that's wonderful. But if you can't, that's fine too. Give yourself grace & permission to term if the stress is killing your sanity. Hugs to you!:hug:

[Ariana]

Ok... How about I send him to your house for a few hours. Then we can compare notes ::

If this child is truly doing this in just a minute without supervision he needs to be my shadow. I have a two year old like this. She is much better now but for 7 months she was never left alone except to nap and only because she doesn't move during nap.

[Justjoy]

Thanks so much mamanda. Helps to know someone else is dealing with this kind of thing. I'm a former preschool teacher and have two grown children of my own. My son was ADHD so I understand, but this child takes it beyond anything I've ever witnessed. Hopefully with age and being around my other calmer daycare kids will help :confused:

[Justjoy]

If this child is truly doing this in just a minute without supervision he needs to be my shadow. I have a two year old like this. She is much better now but for 7 months she was never left alone except to nap and only because she doesn't move during nap.

I hear you, and that's what I'll have to do. Hopefully he'll get tired of me being stuck like glue to him

[CityGarden]

My initial reaction to your post was similar to Ariana's but thinking it thru a bit more I think my environment is naturally and also by design baby proofed in a different manner than yours , so from that perspective I suggest really looking at the environment.

Consider hiring a third party baby proofing company or using a Childproofing Checklist by Age like this one: http://www.childproofingexperts.com/...cklist-by-age/

One you have the safety items in place then you can streamline the environment. I start each school year with very little out and children earn more items in the environment based on what I feel the group can handle.

[ColorfulSunburst]

Ok... How about I send him to your house for a few hours. Then we can compare notes ::

If the child left the daycare and ran barefoot in the snow, this can only be called as poor supervision. I am not sorry to say that.

[Josiegirl]

If the child left the daycare and ran barefoot in the snow, this can only be called as poor supervision. I am not sorry to say that.

I am torn on this point. I almost agree with this but OTOH once when I went to use the bathroom while we were getting ready to go outside(this was years and years ago) a very precocious 4 yo went out the door. The other dcks were yelling about it and I heard the door slam. Talk about panic! I've never had a dck so young(22 mo) be able to handle the door like that, though. I now have a chain on the inside of my door so they cannot open it very far.
Best thing you can do, as CityGarden suggested, is go through and triple baby-proof everything. Good luck, he sounds like he'll keep you on your toes!

[lovemykidstoo]

I am torn on this point. I almost agree with this but OTOH once when I went to use the bathroom while we were getting ready to go outside(this was years and years ago) a very precocious 4 yo went out the door. The other dcks were yelling about it and I heard the door slam. Talk about panic! I've never had a dck so young(22 mo) be able to handle the door like that, though. I now have a chain on the inside of my door so they cannot open it very far.
Best thing you can do, as CityGarden suggested, is go through and triple baby-proof everything. Good luck, he sounds like he'll keep you on your toes!

I"m sorry, but I had to chuckle. I can't imagine being on the toilet and hearing that and then trying to pee faster .

On a serious note, are you allowed to have chains on your door due to fire code?

[Josiegirl]

I"m sorry, but I had to chuckle. I can't imagine being on the toilet and hearing that and then trying to pee faster .

On a serious note, are you allowed to have chains on your door due to fire code?

I brought this question up at a 'meet your licensor' training. I told them my dilemma and their only other solution was to get those door knob covers that kids can't open. My chain is easily opened from the outside of the door; it's only meant for preventing little ones from escaping or opening the door to anyone.
I've even asked the firemen who come annually to inspect my home and they had no idea what else I could do.
I know ideally kids should 'know better' to not open the door and several here have taught their dcks well, as far as never touching the door. But I have kids who just don't listen.

[lovemykidstoo]

I brought this question up at a 'meet your licensor' training. I told them my dilemma and their only other solution was to get those door knob covers that kids can't open. My chain is easily opened from the outside of the door; it's only meant for preventing little ones from escaping or opening the door to anyone.
I've even asked the firemen who come annually to inspect my home and they had no idea what else I could do.
I know ideally kids should 'know better' to not open the door and several here have taught their dcks well, as far as never touching the door. But I have kids who just don't listen.

Definitely safer than the risk of them opening the door and going out for sure. I'm lucky, my front door sticks and is sometimes hard for me to open with 1 hand, so my little runners are ok . Kids should know better, but they're still kids and will try to get away from stuff sometimes.

[TheMisplacedMidwestMom]

I instantly thought about my own ds when reading this. Similar traits, and around that age I was at my wits end, he has since slowed at bit (currently just past 3).

Last spring had a dcm dropping off, we were chatting for a minute when my son started knocking on the window to get our attention... from the outside. We both instantly realized as well that her son was mia. After a quick frantic search we found him hiding inside behind the front door. I was mortified, measures were immediately taken to prevent access at all to the front door.

I totally get the wild child, and as said earlier changing the environment itself was a huge help. As well as, having him become a shadow to the extreme. If I left the room to grab something or go pee he was with me or behind a gate.

I also added an indoor climber, kiddie trampoline and those bouncy balls they sit on to give him somewhere appropriate to climb and bounce. At one point we had the balance bikes in the house.

I said many times, if he wasn't my own child I would've termed care pretty early on.