I allow all my dck's to play with which ever toy they desire with no gender specifications.
Yesterday I 'thought' my 4 yo dcb was doing something inappropriate with a barbie doll but wasn't sure so didn't say anything.
Just now, I caught him suckling on the barbie doll. Yesterday what I thought I saw him doing was inappropriately touching the doll between the legs.
I took the dolls and put them away and said he wouldn't be allowed to play with them any longer. He just stood there for a minute looking at me with this guilty look on his face and then broke down and started crying.
I consoled him because I don't want him to feel guilty, and I didn't say much more than that about it, except I told him that is not the way we play with the barbies.
This child lives next door to me so I know a lot of stuff that goes on over there, but not everything...I mean, we are not close and never even spoke after almost two years being neighbors until I started watching dck about 6 months ago.
Dcm screams at dcb a LOT. The other day I heard her yelling at him that she was going to break his neck. She has a LOT of people in and out of the house all the time (I don't suspect any drugs...just a lot of friends). I know she spanks him, but have no idea to what degree.
The way he acted just now was more out of fear, I felt than anything. It's the same way he has acted in the past when dcm disciplines him here...as though he's terrified he's going to be in big trouble once he leaves.
He has told me before he wants to live with me. I KNOW he loves his mom and I have no doubt she loves him...but I do believe she is very rough and strict on him.
This has thrown me for a loop this morning though with the barbie doll...just by the way he was doing it. I know he also co-sleeps with mom and her boyfriend so I'm concerned about what he's been exposed to.
I really am nervous about saying anything to dcm because I don't want him to punish him severely...but I don't want to not saying anything either.
Any suggestions????
Yesterday I 'thought' my 4 yo dcb was doing something inappropriate with a barbie doll but wasn't sure so didn't say anything.
Just now, I caught him suckling on the barbie doll. Yesterday what I thought I saw him doing was inappropriately touching the doll between the legs.
I took the dolls and put them away and said he wouldn't be allowed to play with them any longer. He just stood there for a minute looking at me with this guilty look on his face and then broke down and started crying.
I consoled him because I don't want him to feel guilty, and I didn't say much more than that about it, except I told him that is not the way we play with the barbies.
This child lives next door to me so I know a lot of stuff that goes on over there, but not everything...I mean, we are not close and never even spoke after almost two years being neighbors until I started watching dck about 6 months ago.
Dcm screams at dcb a LOT. The other day I heard her yelling at him that she was going to break his neck. She has a LOT of people in and out of the house all the time (I don't suspect any drugs...just a lot of friends). I know she spanks him, but have no idea to what degree.
The way he acted just now was more out of fear, I felt than anything. It's the same way he has acted in the past when dcm disciplines him here...as though he's terrified he's going to be in big trouble once he leaves.
He has told me before he wants to live with me. I KNOW he loves his mom and I have no doubt she loves him...but I do believe she is very rough and strict on him.
This has thrown me for a loop this morning though with the barbie doll...just by the way he was doing it. I know he also co-sleeps with mom and her boyfriend so I'm concerned about what he's been exposed to.
I really am nervous about saying anything to dcm because I don't want him to punish him severely...but I don't want to not saying anything either.
Any suggestions????
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