How Long Do You Let Them Cry?

[Heidi]

ok...so my playdate idea didn't go over...I did it for my newest family before they started, and then had the kids come one day for just an hour. They transitioned well, but their circumstances were different.

Once years ago, I had a little guy (14 months) who's mom had moved here from Puerto Rico, leaving him behind with grandma for 3 months until she got settled. She picked him up from the airport, and he started in my dc the next day! Mom was a stranger to him, and he spoke no english. Wow!

He followed my assistant and I around for 4 weeks solid...eh eh eh eh eh every waking moment. It was not fun, but we learned a few words in spanish, and we held him when we could.

One day he just stopped... thank goodness!

I just saw him last winter...my little Juanito. At 14, he didn't remember me, nor did he appreciate "Jaunito"....

[momma2girls]

I did daycare for a little 9 or 10 month old little girl. SHe had never been away from Mom before. It was awful from day one, and only seemed to be getting worse, instead of better. She only came 2-3 days per week!! I even gave the family over a month, instead of 2 weeks as a trial period. Finally after about 6 weeks, I said enoughs enough!!! It wasn't fair to me, the other daycare children, etc..... She screamed constantly if I wasn't holding her!!! UGHH!!!!

[My3cents]

I think we are saying the same thing, just in different ways. I said "probably" not that it wasnt possible at all. But if I gave a child 4 to 6 weeks to adjust and things were just as bad as when they started, then yes, I do believe that the chances become smaller and smaller that anything is going to change. Its something to consider at least. I just would hate for the OP to feel that she has to keep trying longer and longer and trying this and that to make it work. I would suggest the same things as you....give it more time, talk to the parents, etc, etc. BUT even if she decided today that she cannot take it one more day, that is fine. I would support her decision. We dont all have to work with every child. Even if time IS the answer (which we dont know for sure), there is nothing wrong with saying that you just arent up to giving that time and that you would rather just give the spot to another kid that did not need that time to adjust. Its okay to say that this kid is not working out and that you arent up to the challenge of working with them.

[COLOR="Red"]yes yes and yes---- never try to take care of a child that you feel you can't handle one more minute of it. We all know our personal limits. Your business, your the boss of your business. Run your daycare the way you want and what works for you and your family.

I am hearing you--- and it is ok for us to not completely agree and still respect each other for differences of opinions. I have found that all kids are different and what makes them tick, environments, issues, just personal make up, etc.. I have had many kids that if I would have gave up on them or termed early on, even months on, I would be missing out on great kids. Not everyone has the same patience and perseverance to be able to handle a hard child. That is ok!!! very important to put out there and glad you mentioned- Do what works for you!!!

Happy Friday everyone!