New Parent Just Pulled Child, Stressed....Need Advice

[Sprouts]

Okay so after dealing with this high maintenence mom (i should have known) ...she brings her child in (14 months) on monday to help get aquainted with me and the other children (mind you his first official day was supposed to be tuesday)...so when I do this "phase in" i ask if a family member can stay just so the child doesn't have anxiety..so his grandma stays...during this hour he does great! were playing, hes exploring, the other child i watch and my son when they get excited they start to "wrestle" and hug a lot, the new boy not used to this started to cry when one of the babies was hugging him and didnt want to let go....it was fine i held him, calmed him down, all was well...

anyways, next morning when child is supposed to start Mom texts me "from what my mother and I observed from the kids rough playing, i discussed with my husband and he doesnt want our son to attend and would like to have a more structured environment...blah blah blah"....

so now the issue is getting her payment back, in our contract it states deposit non refundable if it is to hold a spot for more then 2 weeks...she gave me deposit on 6-16 and the day she decided to pull him was July 3rd...which makes that 2 weeks 3 days...she told me her husband is going to call me to discuss this because they obviously dont agree...
I dont want issues, i rather end this on good terms, and i honestly was releived she told me this because i didnt want to deal with her high maintence, and i truly feel she was looking for something more "convenient" (drop in whenever she felt like) and this was her excuse...ugh i hate these situations....

[Michael]

Stick to your contract. It was her responsibility to read it and abide by it. For her, it should be "lesson learned".

[sharlan]

I agree with Michael. Tell them to reread their contract.

[Wigglesandgiggles]

I would not refund it.

[Former Teacher]

I agree as well. What is the point of having a contract if exceptions are being made?

At least its a relief to you! happyface

[Hunni Bee]

Nope, your contract says nonrefundable after two weeks, so it's nonrefundable. That was a personal decision on her part to pull him, not something wrong you did. You can't compromise for every angry parent that wants special, kwim?

[MizzCheryl]

You wasted alot of your time dealing with this family. You should be compensated. You could have started another child. Stick to your contract. They chose to drop out.

[cheerfuldom]

I would keep the deposit and in the future, alter it to say that ALL deposits are non refundable. I wouldnt talk to the parents at all anymore. I would send one certified mailed letter that outlines your policy, details that deposit will not be returned, contains a copy of the signed contract as well as details regarding the check date and start date. Then cease all contact, do not get into any arguments via email, text, or phone. Do not answer the door if they come by.

You are well within your right to do this.

[Sprouts]

Thank you all for the encouragement! My back bone will stay strong on this 4th of July!

The father emailed me and basically said the children here are to rough for his son blah blah blah, he wants all his money back, blah blah..some more excuses, blah blah blah....to which i replied...and heres the letter

***X,

As a parent I understand your concern with "rough play", but children are encouraged to interact with one another. We don't accept hitting, biting, pushing or anything of the sort. *** and the other child were simply excited to have a new friend, the other child was simply hugging *** and it surprised him causing him to cry which I tended to immediately. We apologize if *** was afraid when approached by the other child. Saturday June 16th when *** first brought the deposit (which is mandatory to hold a child's spot) he had contact with *** and there was no foul or rough play. I feel the rough play is being a bit over-exagerated.

The week he was supposed to come in for "phase-in" is not mandatory, I don't ask for pay for those days even though I give my time. *** did not want *** to come in because he had a blister on his lip early that week and one of the children were getting over a cold. I never cancled on thursday, *** told me she wanted to bring him friday instead which she did briefly to drop off the check, and again we didn't want to expose him to a cold. I can forward you the email she sent me on the 27th stating this.

As far as the contract is concerned, *** read it, agreed to it and signed it. The deposit is to hold a child's spot here at *** for 2 weeks. Upon *** signing the Statement of Understanding on June 16th, 2012, we tunred down all parents who inquired about an open infant position at our daycare. The two weeks for refund entitlement ended on June 30, 2012 as per our agreement. In all fairness, you are being refunded the difference of the full time and part time slot.

Tomorrow at 3:30 (as per my conversation with ***), *** belongings will be ready for pick up along with the $250.00 Refund.


sooo lets see what happens now, i feel like the mom is trying not to look bad and making up stuff too, whatever theyre all full of u know what.

And yes cheerful i did change my contract that same day to making the deposit non-refundable...forget dates and time limits, if parents want the spot they will pay for it.

[Meyou]

It kinda sounds like Mom made a huge deal over nothing because she's super over protective.

[Kaddidle Care]

If she considers hugging rough play, she's in for a rude awakening. :: Wait until it's truly cold/allergy season. Over protective big time - you dodged a bullet.

[texascare]

I agree as well. What is the point of having a contract if exceptions are being made?

At least its a relief to you! happyface

Amen! If you take the time to write and draw up a contract you need to stand by it. Otherwise, what's the point of having one? In this business there will be issues her and there but that is why you have a contract!

[Sprouts]

okay so the mother is stating she wasnt referring to her son and the other child playing, she was referring to the way my son and the other girl i watch played. They do love to wrestle and sometimes it can seem rough. I did review my cameras to see what she referred to and I can see I might be concerned too from her point of view, but at the same time if she was concerned about it I am always open to talk about it and see what we can do to ease her. I also noticed I did give mom too much attention and not enough to the kids and I probably should have handled their play a little more.

At the same time, if she had noticed this play a day after the two weeks or a month after the two weeks it still doesnt change the contract and what she signed.

This is all a learning experience for me and I continually try to improve my parenting and handling situations and behavior and discipline, and I do hate confrontation, but I also know I dont want to be a push over....and on top of that the father writes me .."this is the most rediculous game ive seen, it is completely unprofessional ..."

UGH i hate this

[cheerfuldom]

okay so the mother is stating she wasnt referring to her son and the other child playing, she was referring to the way my son and the other girl i watch played. They do love to wrestle and sometimes it can seem rough. I did review my cameras to see what she referred to and I can see I might be concerned too from her point of view, but at the same time if she was concerned about it I am always open to talk about it and see what we can do to ease her. I also noticed I did give mom too much attention and not enough to the kids and I probably should have handled their play a little more.

At the same time, if she had noticed this play a day after the two weeks or a month after the two weeks it still doesnt change the contract and what she signed.

This is all a learning experience for me and I continually try to improve my parenting and handling situations and behavior and discipline, and I do hate confrontation, but I also know I dont want to be a push over....and on top of that the father writes me .."this is the most rediculous game ive seen, it is completely unprofessional ..."

UGH i hate this

No matter what you say to them at this point, they dont care. They want their money back and they want you to apologize profusely and beg for forgiveness. You didnt do anything wrong. Yes the kids got rough...thats not the point. Even if the kids were swinging from the chandelier, they STILL signed a contract that says deposits are nonrefundable after 2 weeks. Do not get into any further discussion about WHY they are not sticking with your daycare or why you have to enforce the rule. Discussions tell parents that things are negotiable. You dont have to justify any rule in the contract. The time for those discussions was in the interview process.

I would follow up with one final email and then ignore ALL contact from them.....

Dear Parent,

Again, please find attached a copy of the contract you signed which states that no refunds are given past two weeks from the check date. There is no verbiage that gives exceptions to this rule based on a particular reason that the refund is requested. There are no exceptions to this rule.

Good luck in your daycare search and please read all future daycare documentation closely, for your own protection.

No further contact of any sort is needed in this situation and no contact will be responded to.

XYZ daycare

[cheerfuldom]

and be prepared for a final flurry of nasty texts and so forth from this dad. we all know that he is the one being unprofessional in not abiding by a signed contract. He is never going to admit that at this point. you have nothing to gain from responding to them in anyway so dont do it.