Excited, Worried. New Client Tell Me I'm Not Crazy

[Unregistered]

thank you for all of the advise.

I do feel flattered that she thinks so highly of me, but with her going into my program with such high expectations, I don't want her to feel let down if I can't live up to her expectations and standards.

As for Nan, I love her train of thought, she reminds me of my father. Plan for the worst, but expect the best.

I will keep this in mind Nan, I know you mean well and are looking out for my own good.

I am going to talk with the mom and just let her know how I feel, I am sure she is expecting me to feel this way.

I know it will all work out in the end. I do have a great place to offer and I don't have anything to hide, so no reason why it would not work.

Thanks again

[nannyde]

Nanny.....sometimes I wonder where you come up with some of your ideas and opinions?????? :confused::confused:

LOTS of years of service and LOTS of provider counselling. I've seen many providers whole business come crashing down over "friends". Not saying it can't work but it IS risky.

DO NOT allow them to visit each others kids.

Crystal:
How on earth can she enforce that? THAT is not her business, and clearly these people are friends or they would not have been referred. I think what you suggest here is impossible.

Not host it at YOUR house. They can visit each other all they want OUTSIDE the day care but having friends within the child care can mean requests to visit the other friends kids at arrival and departure.

As far as sick info... it IS different with friends because illness is usually progressional and what they are very willing to tell each other at one stage of illness may elicit questions at the next level of illness.

When their kid is attending a birthday party where one of the other kids pukes in the middle of the party... they are going to ASK if that kid is in day care the next day. They may be privy to each others kids health status long before you are.

The picking each others kids up... of course you have a say about that. If you have a policy that you don't allow other day care parents to pick up your day care kids they either agree or they don't sign up.

[nannyde]

As for Nan, I love her train of thought, she reminds me of my father. Plan for the worst, but expect the best.

I will keep this in mind Nan, I know you mean well and are looking out for my own good.

I do have your best interest in mind.

Just put my thoughts in the back of your head and then make your OWN decision of what works best for YOU and your family.

Forewarned is forearmed

[Crystal]

LOTS of years of service and LOTS of provider counselling. I've seen many providers whole business come crashing down over "friends". Not saying it can't work but it IS risky.

DO NOT allow them to visit each others kids.

Crystal:
How on earth can she enforce that? THAT is not her business, and clearly these people are friends or they would not have been referred. I think what you suggest here is impossible.

Not host it at YOUR house. They can visit each other all they want OUTSIDE the day care but having friends within the child care can mean requests to visit the other friends kids at arrival and departure. If they attend daycare together, they WILL be be visiting each other at daycare? I guess I don't understand what you are saying here?

As far as sick info... it IS different with friends because illness is usually progressional and what they are very willing to tell each other at one stage of illness may elicit questions at the next level of illness.

When their kid is attending a birthday party where one of the other kids pukes in the middle of the party... they are going to ASK if that kid is in day care the next day. They may be privy to each others kids health status long before you are. I agree about not sharing sick info.

The picking each others kids up... of course you have a say about that. If you have a policy that you don't allow other day care parents to pick up your day care kids they either agree or they don't sign up.No, actually I think that could be illegal. A parent has the right to say who can and cannot pick up their child, daycare parent or not. IDK, just seems odd to me that it would even matter?

I guess I just don't understand what you are saying?

[nannyde]

I guess I just don't understand what you are saying?

Anytime you add the layer of another daycare parent into the compliance of a day care parent you run the risk of magnifying the noncompliance into two... or in this case three families.

The most common areas of noncompliance are illness, time, and payment.

If the picking up parent is late is she responsible for the late fee for the other child too?

If the picking up parents kid gets sick during the day do you release the other child into her care because the Mom has given you permission to have the other parent pick up? If she picks up her child but not the other is SHE responsible to pick up on time as scheduled? Are you responsible to notify the other parent that the child is being picked up and going home with a kid that just puked and has a fever of 103?

We just had a poster say a parent didn't return calls and picked their kid up a couple of HOURS after the kid was found sick. What if that parent was supposed to pick up another day care kid? Is it okay if the kid leaves early? What if you can't get ahold of parent one to ask? Is parent two going to be pissed because you didn't release the child early?

When you start intertwining parents into each others compliance it is RISKY.

[Crystal]

Anytime you add the layer of another daycare parent into the compliance of a day care parent you run the risk of magnifying the noncompliance into two... or in this case three families.

The most common areas of noncompliance are illness, time, and payment.

If the picking up parent is late is she responsible for the late fee for the other child too?

If the picking up parents kid gets sick during the day do you release the other child into her care because the Mom has given you permission to have the other parent pick up? If she picks up her child but not the other is SHE responsible to pick up on time as scheduled? Are you responsible to notify the other parent that the child is being picked up and going home with a kid that just puked and has a fever of 103?

We just had a poster say a parent didn't return calls and picked their kid up a couple of HOURS after the kid was found sick. What if that parent was supposed to pick up another day care kid? Is it okay if the kid leaves early? What if you can't get ahold of parent one to ask? Is parent two going to be pissed because you didn't release the child early?

When you start intertwining parents into each others compliance it is RISKY.

I have three families that are all related to each other. They have been with me for three years. I have NEVER had any of these issues. I have had parents pick up each others' kids, but it was PREPLANNED and I was informed ahead of time that it was happening. I don't rely on them to pick up each others' kids when they are sick etc, they only do it if they are doing something together after work, etc. And it has ALWAYS been that the parent who picks up is able to get there earlier than the next parent would. I have never released a kid without the parents permission that same day to do so, so there would be no allowing the kid to leave early without that permission first, THAT DAY. And, yes, if they pick up LATE, they would be responsible for the late charge....it's in my contract. Though I have never had that issue arise.

I just don't think it is AS risky as you play it out to be. Risky, a little, but not so much as you describe it.

[Cat Herder]

Just a share; as close to on topic as I can muster with no caffeine in the house and a raging headache.

All of my current clients and half of my last couple groups were college roommates / friends and socialize outside of my home. It is a delicate balance, but can be done.

I agree with not allowing them to "visit" with other clients kids during my daycare hours. I put that rule in place because of an incident one year where Mom A sent her child in a "It's my Birthday" shirt on the Mom B's child's actual birthday (child A's party was the following day). Drama ensued....

For me it was a non-issue. DCK A was changed into another shirt for the party photos and I tossed it into their cubby for the following day. Mom A proceeded to email ALL of my clients, and me, about how tacky it was....

There have been a few other "friend-emy" type dramas since, but I have become quite adept a managing it.

I would WELCOME having the Licensor here, though. FINALLY, a captive audience to explain things....::::

[nannyde]

I have three families that are all related to each other. They have been with me for three years. I have NEVER had any of these issues. I have had parents pick up each others' kids, but it was PREPLANNED and I was informed ahead of time that it was happening. I don't rely on them to pick up each others' kids when they are sick etc, they only do it if they are doing something together after work, etc. And it has ALWAYS been that the parent who picks up is able to get there earlier than the next parent would. I have never released a kid without the parents permission that same day to do so, so there would be no allowing the kid to leave early without that permission first, THAT DAY. And, yes, if they pick up LATE, they would be responsible for the late charge....it's in my contract. Though I have never had that issue arise.

I just don't think it is AS risky as you play it out to be. Risky, a little, but not so much as you describe it.

I'm just saying that "I" think it's really risky.

[daycare]

Just a share; as close to on topic as I can muster with no caffeine in the house and a raging headache.

All of my current clients and half of my last couple groups were college roommates / friends and socialize outside of my home. It is a delicate balance, but can be done.

I agree with not allowing them to "visit" with other clients kids during my daycare hours. I put that rule in place because of an incident one year where Mom A sent her child in a "It's my Birthday" shirt on the Mom B's child's actual birthday (child A's party was the following day). Drama ensued....

For me it was a non-issue. DCK A was changed into another shirt for the party photos and I tossed it into their cubby for the following day. Mom A proceeded to email ALL of my clients, and me, about how tacky it was....

There have been a few other "friend-emy" type dramas since, but I have become quite adept a managing it.

I would WELCOME having the Licensor here, though. FINALLY, a captive audience to explain things....::::

Guess you could kiss the excuse "it's licensing's. Rules "

Lol

[Cat Herder]

Guess you could kiss the excuse "it's licensing's. Rules "

Lol

NOT at all..... When the OTHER parents complain about "silly" things (like us not being able to play sidewalk chalk on the driveway anymore) I can say... " Ask Mrs. *****, maybe SHE can get us an exception." happyfacehappyfacehappyface

I would be THRILLED!!! ::

[daycare]

NOT at all..... When the OTHER parents complain about "silly" things (like us not being able to play sidewalk chalk on the driveway anymore) I can say... " Ask Mrs. *****, maybe SHE can get us an exception." happyfacehappyfacehappyface

I would be THRILLED!!! ::

...yes so very true and what a great way to look at it...

[nannyde]

I would WELCOME having the Licensor here, though. FINALLY, a captive audience to explain things....::::

I was thinking about this and thought of another angle.

We just had a blazing thread on the "shortest enrollment ever" where we were blessed with the parents P.O.V.

That thread was a perfect example of how something can occur and the viewpoint of the provider was litterally a hundred percent opposite of the parents P.O.V.

If we didn't hear both sides of the story we couldn't have made that up if we tried.

In that scenario........ if the parent was a co-worker of the licensor I think the complaint the parent made would have carried a tremendous amount of weight.

That's one of the inherent risks of taking children of employees of the state or the agency that can drastically affect your livlihood. If something happens the parent may have an advantage or influence over the ultimate outcome that they would not have if they were just another entitled parent retaliating because they've gotten their first "no" in life.

I wouldn't work with a client that worked for my DHS. Too much of a conflict of interest for me. I also don't work for friends, family, neighbors, or friends of friends. I've tried it a few times and most times it didn't make me happy. My happiness and comfort level is really important to my LONG TERM success. I try to stay within my comfort zone when it comes to client relationships. It's what works for me.