Biting @ Daycare

[LysesKids]

I cannot believe you would say this about a child. There is a reason I am reading this thread as a parent of a biter, it's because I desperately want to find a solution. My son is 17m old and just started at a new daycare. He is the sweetest, silliest little boy but has bitten three times in his first two days. Alll have been in response to a child taking a toy from him. I am in no way justifying his actions though. If he continues to have a problem and moving him to a new school is best for all involved, I am all for it. I do know, however, that biting is very common in this stage and when children's little brains are being exposed to so many new things st once it can be stressful. This is not a behavior that is curbed overnight and I applaud all parents and teachers who work to fix these issues daily. My son has also been Britten several times. Although I was not happy about it, I am a KIND person and understand. There is nothing I have done or any otger parent of a biter has done that has caused their child to act this way. Children, just as adults, process stress in different ways. You obviously are not one who practices patience and compassion in your everyday life so who are you to judge a small child facing these feelings head on for the first time? If the shoe was on the other foot I know I would be concerned for my child but I would certainly handle it with more grace than you

Darlin' not only is this an old thread that you posted to, I still stand by IT'S not normal to kids to bite more than once or twice and I do 1-21 months care only... I am also not the only provider to state this.

[Snowmom]

I cannot believe you would say this about a child. There is a reason I am reading this thread as a parent of a biter, it's because I desperately want to find a solution. My son is 17m old and just started at a new daycare. He is the sweetest, silliest little boy but has bitten three times in his first two days. Alll have been in response to a child taking a toy from him. I am in no way justifying his actions though. If he continues to have a problem and moving him to a new school is best for all involved, I am all for it. I do know, however, that biting is very common in this stage and when children's little brains are being exposed to so many new things st once it can be stressful. This is not a behavior that is curbed overnight and I applaud all parents and teachers who work to fix these issues daily. My son has also been Britten several times. Although I was not happy about it, I am a KIND person and understand. There is nothing I have done or any otger parent of a biter has done that has caused their child to act this way. Children, just as adults, process stress in different ways. You obviously are not one who practices patience and compassion in your everyday life so who are you to judge a small child facing these feelings head on for the first time? If the shoe was on the other foot I know I would be concerned for my child but I would certainly handle it with more grace than you

It's always good to keep in mind that biting can be an emotional experience for all involved- both children, both sets of parents and the caregiver.
I understand you feel defensive about the post you quoted. That's natural and you do have valid points.
I also understand the poster whose child was bitten. To me, that post was full of frustration and emotion, just as yours was (although stated in a much different tone).

From a caregiver's standpoint, we do understand both sides and it's never easy for either party. We understand it can be an age-appropriate response to the child's surroundings and developing mind (to a degree).
We (as caregivers) are often on the receiving end of this kind of frustration from the family of the bitten child, and we know how frustrating it can be when parents don't understand that it can be quite common among young children.
As parents ourselves, we also understand that biting can be excruciatingly painful and nobody should be subjected to it on an ongoing basis.
I wish you luck on finding a solution that works for your child, I really do.

[DenBrown]

Recently we've been faced with the same issue..and everybody used to pretend like everything was ok until we noticed constant scratches and bites

[Unregistered]

Biting

I know this is a really old thread, but biting in childcare is still a relevant topic. In my home childcare, I have occasionally had biters. In fact, I accepted 2 children who were expelled from centers for biting. My approach that seemed to work very well was to enlist the help of the other children. We would have circle time and discuss the biting and I would stress that each of us had a right to not be bitten and if anyone would try to bite you, you had the right to stop them. I emphasized using our words and loudly telling the "biter" to get away and gave children permission to protect themselves by pushing the biter away if necessary. We didn't point out or shame the "biter". The "biter" had the same rights as the other children in protecting himself. No one should be bitten. I had really good luck with this approach. Granted, it works better with slightly older children and I never had a child who bit multiple times a day every day. I have been doing family childcare for 30+ years and I've never had to suspend a child for their behavior. It helps to have low numbers and kids of different ages together which doesn't happen often in centers. Biting can spread like wildfire in a room of 10 toddlers. I am a big proponent of family childcare for many reasons. This is just one of them.

[Michael]

Good perspective. Please consider registering and joining us as a forum member.