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What do you do with picky eaters? How do you handle a child that won't try or eat most of the food you prepare. I serve a large variety of food, and have even sat down with my group of kids to get likes and dislikes. I don't expect every child to clean their plate but at least try one bite to make sure they really don't like what it is I serve. When I have a child that won't eat what I make I feel bad and don't know what to do, deep down I feel they should eat what I serve or go without but I don't want parents mad at me. On the other hand I can't make that child something different just to appease them because then it starts a trend of I want that too and lets face it we aren't getting rich off daycare and we are trying to make a profit but if I am spending all my money on food I'm not going to make that profit. Any thoughts ideas on this would be helpful.
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I offer the same food to every kid (Unless they have allergies or a special diet statement). If they don't eat, they don't eat. I can't force them and I won't force them. I also do not believe in making a child have a "thank you bite" or one taste because IME, that jsut sets you up for a power struggle. I have never had a parent get upset because I talk extensively about how I do meals here that they are fully aware of the fact that you can lead a horse ot water but you can't make them drink.
The kid just gets the plate (or goes and plays if they don't even want to sit) and if they eat; great! If not, then it is their problem not mine. Snack is served a few hours later. No one have ever starved by not being catered too...kwim?
Money only becomes an issue when we are throwing the food away but in reality what is the difference if we spend the money and the kid eats it compared to if we spend the money and we toss it? Either way, we spent the money so.... we offer and serve, the kids choose what to do:
The only choice a kid is given here is, eat or don't. NO food battles here. EVER. -
Same exactly!Originally posted by Blackcat31 View Post
I do not stress over meals at all. They eat or they don't. It is just made VERY clear to both kids and their parents that they will get nothing until the next meal or snack.Comment
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I also stress if they don't eat they will not get anything until snack, but occasionally you have that child that is ok with it but then tells you they are hungry 5 minutes later and ends up throwing a tantrum when you refuse to feed them something.
Blackcat I agree with the thought we are going to spend the money whether we throw it away or they eat it but its hard to see the waste when you grew up in a home that wasting was not allowed.
I read a post where some women don't allow the phrase "I don't like this" and I love that its just getting the kids to follow it because once one says it then 2 or 3 others suddenly don't like it.Comment
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Im the same way, I offer the same foods to each child, and Im sorry but if Jennifer will only eat her yogurt, and refuse her kiwi, grapes, and oranges, green beans, and her cheese sandwich because its on whole wheat bread and has crusts,.. then Jennifer will eat her Apples and cottage cheese for snack wont she?Originally posted by Meeko60 View Post
I make it, Offer it, serve it, and toss it if need be but I will not prepare a different food or allow a child to eat 2 cups of yogurt because they refuse to try something new.
Not here, we have enough meal times, Its not going to hurt her to be a little hungry. Maybe the next time she wont look at me and say, "I TOLD you I ONLY eat WHITE bread and you WILL cut the crust off. "
oph ooppps.... sorry, bad day with a drop in 4 yr old, I swear if it wasnt a current family"s cousins kid in town for a funeral,.. Id have had her picked up hours ago,... My regular kids just about dropped their jaws on the floor when she spoke.
. One actually said,.. wow, she has ugly manners.
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acually I tell the kids to have a try me bite. Its amazing how many children just don't eat because they only eat junk. I have so many children who come to me not eating veggies or fruit. I make the kids try it and we go from there. I now have kids who love watermelon and coconut and pineapple. Now I do have some kids who have days like the rest of us who don't feel like eating, but if its continues then theres a problem.
as for the money, well I don't belong to a food program because in ontario they don't offer it, so it is coming out of my pocket. If they refuse day after day their meals it does add up, I could be buying more food for my own kids.Comment
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Sorry Laundrymom, I feel your pain, everything I made today wasn't liked except and here is a shocker PEAS!! I myself hate them but they loved them and I currently have banana bread baking and one child has said I don't like banana bread, "Well V****** have you ever tried banana bread?" V "no" ugh what is wrong with kids these days they are lucky to have food on their plates, we just had a terrible flood and people 50 miles away lost everything, I bet they wouldn't be complaining if they got a home made meal. Ok off my soap box sorry just irks me how kids are.Comment
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That is hard and I don't mean this rude or unfeeling but that is not the kids' problem. FWIW~ I was raised the same way but we can't let our issues be the dck's kwim?Originally posted by awestbrook713 View Post
I don't allow the kids to say they don't like things either. If they say it, they leave the table. If others copy them, they leave too. As for the kid who throws a tantrum because they didn't eat and are now hungry, I would say "I'm sorry you are hungry but we had lunch and YOU chose not to eat. Snack will be in a while. Maybe tomorrow you will eat." and leave it alone. If they tantrum, walk away. It is their issue not yours.
Natural consequences work great in these situations.Comment
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Having 3 extremely picky eaters, in some ways I cater, other ways I don't.
When it's the 2 little boys, I don't serve what I know they won't eat for breakfast and lunch. For dinner, I cook it and put it on the table, they eat it or they don't.
With the 8 yo, I only serve him waffles or pancakes and water or oj for breakfast. He won't eat eggs or cereal w/milk (hates milk). After school snack is apples or yogurt (the kid kind), and once a week he can have cookies.
Now, when I had more kids, I made breakfast or whatever meal and that was what I served. The kids always ate what I served. I never had a picky eater.Comment
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I agree blackcat my problem not theres, its hard to remember that. I try to do the walking away thing. I am learning the less you pay attention to the tantrum the less power they have and soon give up the fight. Its trying at times because I do have one child who has perfected the tantrum, her screaming is like nails on a chalk board.
I appreciate all the answers and will now follow your advise, whats served is served eat it or go with out until next snack or meal time. I don't have a lot of space between snacks and meals so like someone else said they will not starve, Breakfast is usually 6:30 to 7:30 or 7:30 to 8:30 depending on first arrivals, first snack 10:00 am lunch 11:30 to 12 and pm snack 2pm to 2:30 pm with pick ups usually around 4 to 4:30.Comment
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Originally posted by awestbrook713 View Post
I agree about the temper tantrums.....when they are good at 'em, they are good, but after a while they figure out it isn't getting them any attention so they will soon stop and try to find other ways to get it. Reinforce it by showering the kids who do eat with lots of positive praise. That way your tantrum thrower will see the right way to get attention!
You are definitely not starving anyone with your meal schedule. It is hard and you can do this. Just come on back and post every time you need a boost of encouragment!
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