Have You Ever Had To Report A Parent To CPS?

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I have a little one here that is always got bruises on him parents claim it is from fits (he does throw himself) or being a clumsy 2 year old. However today's bruise is different. It is on the inside of his leg on the upper thigh. Honestly it looks like a squeeze bruise. I can't imagine a fall or fit that cause a bruise on such a meaty area that normally wouldn't connect with the ground or objects in a fall. It is about 4 inches long and about half an inch think.

I don't want to push mom away if this is something innocent but I also don't want to turn a blind eye if a kid needs help. I also don't want mom to think it happened here and if I ask her what happened and it doesn't sound plausible and I have to call CPS how do I handle it if she claims she thinks it happened here?

Anyone been through this before? How did it play out? Was it really abuse? Did the parent find out it was you who called? Did they accuse you of causing the marks?


I know it takes a while to have this posted but I need to decide what to do pretty quickly. I would have posted signed in but you never know who reads these.

[Zoe]

This actually happened to me last week. DCG had a bruise under her eye and when I asked her what happened she said, "mommy did it." Well she's 2 so it wasn't clear and I didn't have any other reason to suspect abuse. So what I did was talk to the lady who does abuse reporting and told her I was hesitant to write up a report. We talked through it and she determined it probably wasn't an abuse issue but she took down the child and mother's info to see if there was any background info that would raise red flags. It was a verbal report in case anything else were to happen.

I later found out the bruise was actually a large mosquito bite and "mommy fixed it".

I would call your licensor or the person in the office that handles these things and just talk about it. It's better to do that then nothing and find out it was actually abuse.

[sharlan]

I have been very fortunate that I've never had to make that call. I've heard some strange stories over the years, but generally after talking to the parents, I've realized it was nothing to be alarmed about.

We're mandated reporters, so I would call if I suspected abuse. BUT, having had a foster child, I've seen the damage that CPS can do.

[Crystal]

I don't think it is neccessarily anything to be concerned about. I know when my son was two he ALWAYS had lots of bruises....he was an adventurous child and would knock into things and fall down. I would have been devastated to be accused of abuse over typical childhood mishaps. I also have DCK now who get lots of bruises HERE. Other than falling, etc. they frequently bruise their legs/shins/thighs on our rock climber. SO....

for now I would document, take a photo of the bruise in question and file it. I would check daily for bruising/marks that appear unusual and then decide if I need to make that call.

[blessedmess8]

Yes, I have had to call. And you do, too! If you have any suspicion, it is your duty! It is NOT your duty, however, to determine if it is abuse or not. That is up to CPS. I've had parents find out. They generally get angry and pull the child. That's not what you want to hear, I know, but it is still doing what is best for the child. CPS may come look at it, interview the child, look at your documentation, and it may stop there. Did you ask mom what happened?

[Unregistered]

I don't think it is neccessarily anything to be concerned about. I know when my son was two he ALWAYS had lots of bruises....he was an adventurous child and would knock into things and fall down. I would have been devastated to be accused of abuse over typical childhood mishaps. I also have DCK now who get lots of bruises HERE. Other than falling, etc. they frequently bruise their legs/shins/thighs on our rock climber. SO....

for now I would document, take a photo of the bruise in question and file it. I would check daily for bruising/marks that appear unusual and then decide if I need to make that call.

Could you get in trouble for documenting it and not reporting if say a dr reports and you didn't. Most of his bruises are like normal active kid marks but upper inner thigh? I am trying to picture an injury that causes that. This part of our job sucks!

[daycare]

When children are being abused most of the time there will be other signs...
loss of sleep, unusual behavior. loss of appetite, etc.

If brusing is the only thing that you see and everything else seems normal, I would chalk it up to life.....kids do strange things and end up with bruising in the strangest places..

If I were you I would document it, along with any other signs that you see...

So sorry you are in this situation...

[Crystal]

Could you get in trouble for documenting it and not reporting if say a dr reports and you didn't. Most of his bruises are like normal active kid marks but upper inner thigh? I am trying to picture an injury that causes that. This part of our job sucks!

I would think not. If you document your first suspicious bruise and then there are a lot of additional incidences you document and donb't report THEN it might become an issue. You could call your licensor and ask though. Or, call CPS and without reporting the family, let them know what you have seen and ask them if you should file a report.

That type of bruising COULD occur from falling off of a chair and landing on a toy or something. I'd just tread very lightly here and be vigilant about checking daily...CPS can destroy an innocent family.

[JenNJ]

For a bruise in the area you are talking about, I would suspect abuse as well. But I dont know this child's situation.

Is the child still in a crib? Is it possible the child's leg was stuck in the slats of the crib? Or a highchair possibly? Does the child ride a tricycle? Could he have slipped or fallen of the bike and bruised that way?

Only you can ask the mom and deem if her answer is plausible. If not, you need to call.

[familyschoolcare]

If it where me I would report and let the people that determine if it is abuse do their job. It sounds like this bruise gives you a bad feeling I would not be able to live with my self if i did not report. If it is nothing and you report it their is not any harm. However, if it is something and you do not report it then .....

[mac60]

If I was a parent, and my child got a bruise or bump and I was reported to CPS, you better bet I would be finding a new provider. I think in these situations where the issue is very questionable, that people should not jump to conclusions and assume the parent is abusive. I am all for reporting if in fact there is proof and you know for sure, but it appears you already asked the mom and she gave you an answer.

[Ariana]

Yes, I have had to call. And you do, too! If you have any suspicion, it is your duty! It is NOT your duty, however, to determine if it is abuse or not. That is up to CPS. I've had parents find out. They generally get angry and pull the child. That's not what you want to hear, I know, but it is still doing what is best for the child. CPS may come look at it, interview the child, look at your documentation, and it may stop there. Did you ask mom what happened?

This! I can't believe people are telling you to let it go. Professionally you are obligated to report suspicion of abuse.

[wdmmom]

If there are new markings daily and you aren't seeing these "fits" while the child is in your care, I would make the call.

I would also take photographs that are time and date stamped for evidence in the event DCM accuses you. Make sure you take photos right when the child is dropped off and another before he/she goes home.

Ultimately it's up to the state to take the report and determine if it warrants an investigation.

[daycare]

If there are new markings daily and you aren't seeing these "fits" while the child is in your care, I would make the call.

I would also take photographs that are time and date stamped for evidence in the event DCM accuses you. Make sure you take photos right when the child is dropped off and another before he/she goes home.

Ultimately it's up to the state to take the report and determine if it warrants an investigation.

Even though I did say that I don't think that I would report it unless there were other signs, I agree with this. If you are seeing new marking daily then I would do exactly this and follow it up with CPS... I am not there and could not really give you advice as I can't see this situation first hand, but also like another poster said if you suspect something then you need to report it....

[blessedmess8]

If I was a parent, and my child got a bruise or bump and I was reported to CPS, you better bet I would be finding a new provider. I think in these situations where the issue is very questionable, that people should not jump to conclusions and assume the parent is abusive. I am all for reporting if in fact there is proof and you know for sure, but it appears you already asked the mom and she gave you an answer.

In my state all child care professionals and teachers are mandated reporters and it is taken seriously. In my case, if something happened and it cme out that I hadn't reported my own suspicions, that would mean big trouble for me. You can NEVER look at a family from the outside and tell if they are abusive or not. It happens in all different kinds of families and socioeconomic brackets.