As some of u know my son is 9 and has severe ADHD! I don't like putting medicines in my young childs body so we only medicate for school concentration. He doesn't get to run with neighborhood kids because I don't want him out of my sight. He is very hyper and impulsive. He will run across a street and not look, same with a bike, just dart across. Soo he is not allowed to roam all over the town like these other kids his age. Plus the other kids are let out at noon and told to be back at 9pm!!
My son isn't as mentally mature as these boys and being that he doesn't hang with them he is lacking hearing sexual type things that some have been overheard discussing. That is 1 of the good points about him missing out. Anyway, the point here is I tried to talk to him a couple weeks ago about what gay was because he heard someone call someone else gay on the street. He didn't go for "gay means happy" So I had to tell him that boys can love boys and girls can love girls... etc... He accepted it ok I guess but giggled and found it funny then didn't want to talk anymore. I think he was embarrassed maybe. (we have not talked sex yet) Ok great I'm off the hook. Same when he asked how he was born. I had a C-section so I was able to honestly tell him they pulled him out of my belly and show him the scar. He accepted it and discussion over.
NOW today he was playing with a friend he invites over sometimes. This boy is in his class and is somewhat behind in a mentally slow way so I allow them to play together without hawk eye supervision. I sat on the deck reading a magazine. They were running in the yard playing tag and my son tried to jump a swing and fell with the swing right in his crotch! The friend (also 9) asks if he was ok, I yelled out asking if he was ok. Dear son laughed and yelled back "OWWW MY COOOCHIE" while grabbing his crotch! ::. OMG!!! The other boy laughed and said u don't have a coochie to which my son argues yes I do, we all do! I'm peeking over the magazine thinking, Ohhh nooo don't go there please??? Sure enough Son yells up, "Mom don't I have a coochie?" I am :: and all in one! I say "no dear u do NOT have a coochie and please don't say that word!" He looks confused and asked "well what is it that I have?" Now he has been told he has a penis but I never said what a girl has because I just fear him saying it or something. (immature remember) I don't know why he called it a coochie instead of a penis! I told him as quietly as possible that he hurt his crotch and we all have crotches. I didn't know what else to say with passers by and someone elses child listening and everytime I try to tell my son something in private this boy follows so I knew not to go there. So I let it go at crotch and shoved my face in my magazine! They went on playing.
WHAT do I tell my child? He is getting to that age and I don't know what to say or when he is ready? He has no Father he basically abandoned him. It's just me. Being my son is not as mature as most 9 yr olds I feel stuck here. What if I tell him and he makes a joke of it in school with the details or says something in apporpriate etc. Yet he is behind when most other 9 yr olds know a little something.
Anyone in this same boat or ever have been? Advise much appreciated here TIA!
My son isn't as mentally mature as these boys and being that he doesn't hang with them he is lacking hearing sexual type things that some have been overheard discussing. That is 1 of the good points about him missing out. Anyway, the point here is I tried to talk to him a couple weeks ago about what gay was because he heard someone call someone else gay on the street. He didn't go for "gay means happy" So I had to tell him that boys can love boys and girls can love girls... etc... He accepted it ok I guess but giggled and found it funny then didn't want to talk anymore. I think he was embarrassed maybe. (we have not talked sex yet) Ok great I'm off the hook. Same when he asked how he was born. I had a C-section so I was able to honestly tell him they pulled him out of my belly and show him the scar. He accepted it and discussion over.
NOW today he was playing with a friend he invites over sometimes. This boy is in his class and is somewhat behind in a mentally slow way so I allow them to play together without hawk eye supervision. I sat on the deck reading a magazine. They were running in the yard playing tag and my son tried to jump a swing and fell with the swing right in his crotch! The friend (also 9) asks if he was ok, I yelled out asking if he was ok. Dear son laughed and yelled back "OWWW MY COOOCHIE" while grabbing his crotch! ::. OMG!!! The other boy laughed and said u don't have a coochie to which my son argues yes I do, we all do! I'm peeking over the magazine thinking, Ohhh nooo don't go there please??? Sure enough Son yells up, "Mom don't I have a coochie?" I am :: and all in one! I say "no dear u do NOT have a coochie and please don't say that word!" He looks confused and asked "well what is it that I have?" Now he has been told he has a penis but I never said what a girl has because I just fear him saying it or something. (immature remember) I don't know why he called it a coochie instead of a penis! I told him as quietly as possible that he hurt his crotch and we all have crotches. I didn't know what else to say with passers by and someone elses child listening and everytime I try to tell my son something in private this boy follows so I knew not to go there. So I let it go at crotch and shoved my face in my magazine! They went on playing.
WHAT do I tell my child? He is getting to that age and I don't know what to say or when he is ready? He has no Father he basically abandoned him. It's just me. Being my son is not as mature as most 9 yr olds I feel stuck here. What if I tell him and he makes a joke of it in school with the details or says something in apporpriate etc. Yet he is behind when most other 9 yr olds know a little something.
Anyone in this same boat or ever have been? Advise much appreciated here TIA!
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