My Babysitter Termed Me Because I Refused To Pay Her To Get Ready For A Friday Night

[Unregistered]

I have been taking my 19-month-old son to a babysitter for 3 months now. I pay a weekly rate of $150 for a full time space which I really think should be cheaper seen as she is open from 6am – 6pm and will only allow for my son to be there from 7:30am – 4:30pm. There are several other kids still there when I pick my son up at 4:30pm, but apparently I’m only allowed to use 9 hours in one day. I have let this slide, I will say, with little complaint on my part but I have gotten to the point where I’m right pissed with the fact that she is using my hard earned money to get herself dolled up every Friday night. When I show up Friday morning she has her hair straighten and a light amount of make-up on, which I am glad she is professional enough to at least answer the door ready for the day. However, every Friday when I come to pick up my son she has her hair curled all up and complete make-up. Today she even had fake eyelashes on and re-painted her toenails. I just could not handle it anymore so I confronted her about it. I asked her when she has the time in her day to make herself look so good while she is watching my son and other kids, her response was during nap time. How is she able to properly supervise my child if she is off in the bathroom curling up her hair and gluing on fake lashes? What if my son was crying while she had wet paint on her toenails? I asked her all this, and she responded with if she needs to run she just runs, if anything gets ruined in the process she will start over. Ok? So how long exactly does this process take I ask. She responds with it depends on the day and what I feel like doing to pretty myself up. At which point I told her I no longer wanted her doing this while my son was in her care. She handed me my son and told me that she was giving me my two weeks notice and will have a letter for me tomorrow morning. When I protested she tried to shut the door on my face and my foot ended up getting smashed, which I had put on the landing because I was not done discussing things with her. I said a few things I should not of at that point due to the pain she had caused to my foot and her husband came out scolded me and told me to leave, which I did. I get home today and find an email from her saying that she could no longer accept my child into her care and is terming me because of harassment. She has a harassment equals no refund in her handbook, but I really do not think that I harassed her. So now my babysitter gets to keep two weeks of pay, I’m out a sitter and she is going to continue painting herself up every Friday! What can I do to get my money back?

[daycare]

I think I am going to see what others have to say to this post, as I am awaiting some interesting responses........

[Cat Herder]

Was this your son's first Childcare Provider?

[Unregistered]

No I had my son with another babysitter prior but she decided to go back to school a few months ago so could not longer take care of my son.

[snbauser]

First - Did you sign a contract? If so, then you knew the rules regarding hours. Many providers limit the number of hours a child can be in care. You said that there are still many kids there when you pick up your child. How many of them are there when you drop off? They may be limited to the same 9 hours you are but drop their kids off later than you. Or they may have an agreement with the provider for extra hours. Whatever it is, it isn't your business if you signed a contract agreeing to what hours you are paying for.

Second - Not even sure where to start on the other issue.

[daycare]

I have a question for you.... if you could keep your child from open to close daily would you?

[Crystal]

Geez....it's Friday night there already? You must be in Australia or something.

[melskids]

i'm going to leave most of this alone...for fear of popping a vein in my forehead....but i will leave you with this....

just because i am willing to care for children between the hours of 6 am and 6 pm, doesnt mean i want little johnny here for the whole 12 hours.

my 4:30 pickup knows my 6:00 pickup pays DEARLY for the extra hour and a half.

[daycare]

i'm going to leave most of this alone...for fear of popping a vein in my forehead....but i will leave you with this....

just because i am willing to care for children between the hours of 6 am and 6 pm, doesnt mean i want little johnny here for the whole 12 hours.

my 4:30 pickup knows my 6:00 pickup pays DEARLY for the extra hour and a half.

I already got my hummus and carrots out.... Yes I have no life.... this is all the entertainment I get...

[sharlan]

Hmmmmmmmmm, I may be way off base, but do I smell a troll?

[Crazy8]

ok, I'll bite.....

yes, the $3.33/hr. you are paying for child care is RIDICULOUS!!!! You should be thrilled she termed you at that highway robbery of a rate.

Just out of curiousity, have you ever done ANYTHING but watch your child sleep during his non-waking hours??? Why is it different for your child care provider. If she is in the house and can hear him if needed there is NO REASON why she can't curl her hair, add fake eyelashes, make dinner, throw some laundry in, etc. PULEEZ.

[Kaddidle Care]

I pay a weekly rate of $150 for a full time space which I really think should be cheaper seen as she is open from 6am – 6pm and will only allow for my son to be there from 7:30am – 4:30pm.

7:30-4:30 = 9 hours x 5 days a week = 45 hours a week. Divide that $150.00 by 45 hours and you have $3.33 per hour. And you think it should be CHEAPER?

Do YOU work 9 hours straight without a break? I don't think so! She's probably working more than 12 hours a day as there is still cleaning and planning to do after the children go home. Putting on a bit of make up and/or painting her nails for a few moments while she sits back and takes a breather is what makes her happy.

Slam the door? You're lucky she didn't spit in your face. Best wishes with finding a new care giver. Make sure you find an ugly one next time.

(Sorry, I have PMS and your post got under my skin a bit. Jealous much?)

[cheerfuldom]

oh geez...if this is a real person I am just going to say it. You acted like a jerk and I would have termed you too! If you didn't like the hours, rate or her activities during those hours, you should have handled it like an adult, discussed issues without getting snotty and ended the conversation in an adult manner. You don't own her. She's a regular person and if she wants to put on a little makeup and fix her hair while the kids are napping, that is certainly reasonable. I'm glad she termed you and hope you learned your lesson about how to treat your daycare provider with respect.

[nannyde]

My advice is to do some research on child care providers before you hire the next one.

You are describing many aspects of the provider/parent contracts and relationships that cause a lot of problems in this line of work.

You aren't understanding the difference between the hours the service is open and the hours you are paying for within that service. I'm open twelve hours a day and none of my clients use more than nine hours of this time. If they wanted twelve hour days their day care rate would be MARKEDLY higher.

You are concerned about what she is doing at nap time because you feel she can't supervise him properly if she is doing make up. I can only ask if you have someone watching him sleep when he is in your care? If your child needs an adult to watch him sleep 24/7 then you must hire a provider that has him physically in the same room with her at all times.

You may believe that your 150 a week is enough money to allow you to be her employer but it is not. She is self employed and you don't get to decide in ANY way how she runs her business. You can only decide if the business she runs is suitable for YOUR child NOT what services she offers. She is her own boss and can decide for any reason that you aren't a suitable client. With your protesting today she decided you are not suitable. This was a GOOD decision because you aren't happy with what she has to offer. Consider this a blessing for you and your son.

If you feel she has taken money she doesn't deserve then feel free to file a small claims in court and sue her for it. Let the judge decide what is fair.

[familyschoolcare]

At which point I told her I no longer wanted her doing this while my son was in her care.

If you want the privilege of telling your child care provider what she can and can not do while your child is in her care then, you have to pay for a nanny. Yes, this cost more. However, you will then be able to tell her what she can and can not do while your child is in her care.