Need Help with a Reply

[Ac114]

Hi ladies! I don’t know why I’m having trouble formulating a reply but one of my DCM’s asked me if she could get off work early one day in June to have a birthday celebration at my house for her daughter. She wants to bring some games, cupcakes and goodie bags. I’m not sure why I feel bad telling this mom no or feel like I’m being mean when I’m not. I’m not a party venue and her coming here would be extremely disruptive to the day. She’s been a good DC parent so maybe that’s where the guilt is coming from. Help me with a nice, polite but no this will not work reply please! I was going to say something along the lines of I have to be fair across the board and what I do for one family I will have to do for others and where do I draw the line..... idk

[Cat Herder]

"I do host a small class birthday party for the kids during morning snack. My policy is no adults because of the disruption it causes for the other kids. I will be glad to pass out party invitations for you, though."

I do have to allow parents to come occasionally to do cultural food and cooking activities if they ask because of STARS. I prefer to invite so I have time to write the lesson plan, goals, objectives, collect needed supplies due to allergies and obtain State and parent permission forms.

I have had one client try to do a meal activity on their child's birthday. I was able to shut it down by pointing out the goal was a learning activity for the group, not a celebration of one child and the food had to be prepared in it's entirety during the activity. A box of cupcakes from the bakery would not meet the objective. When I offered an alternative date and list of approved activities, they were no longer interested.

[Snowmom]

DCM, if you'd like to pick up your daughter early to celebrate the day with her, I think she'd absolutely love that. As far as birthday celebrations within the group, we have a small group activity planned for each child's birthday. It's purposefully planned to be the same activity for each child enrolled. In light of allergies and sensitivities, please refrain from bringing goodie bags or treats. Thanks!

[MomBoss]

I love to put the blame on licensing and say that I cannot have unauthorized people spending time with the children. They would have to do a background check at their expense.

[rosieteddy]

I amsorry Daycare Mom that's not possible.My program does not support that.That would be my response.I did have cupcakes and a gift from me for each DCchild on birthdays.I think it would be opening a can of worms.Every parent would want to do that ,what a nightmare.All kinds of no.

[Ariana]

I cannot believe she asked you that

Any of the above responses would work!

[Valerie928]

Hi ladies! I don’t know why I’m having trouble formulating a reply but one of my DCM’s asked me if she could get off work early one day in June to have a birthday celebration at my house for her daughter. She wants to bring some games, cupcakes and goodie bags. I’m not sure why I feel bad telling this mom no or feel like I’m being mean when I’m not. I’m not a party venue and her coming here would be extremely disruptive to the day. She’s been a good DC parent so maybe that’s where the guilt is coming from. Help me with a nice, polite but no this will not work reply please! I was going to say something along the lines of I have to be fair across the board and what I do for one family I will have to do for others and where do I draw the line..... idk

Completely awkward. I am absolutely stunned by parents sometimes.

[springv]

we do morning snack that doesn't count and if a child has a birthday, we tell parents to bring a special treat during that time.

[Blackcat31]

I would use one of the standard excuses.

Liability insurance wouldn't allow something like that
It's against licensing rules/regulations


I 'kind of' see mom's perspective but seriously....doesn't she see yours at all?? :confused:

[WBee]

I agree with all above. I let one parent do this-once. She brought her two older kids with her, who sat on my dining room table! They were all over the place and the mom brought pizza, handed it out to all of the kids and it was a huge cluster of chaos! Thank God it was her last day here-not a birthday.

[LittleExplorers]

You could always ask if parents are ok sharing contact info so she could invite them to her to home or party venue.

[lblanke]

Sorry, I cannot host a birthday party at daycare. I will be glad to pass out party invitations for you, though, as long as every child is invited.

[lblanke]

I will say that when my child was in preschool, the preschool did allow parents to send in mini cupcakes or another treat for a group snack and birthday plates and napkins for the snack that day, but not to plan a huge party. Parents had to send in labels in advance due to food allergies.