Curious - Do You Respond?

[Baby Beluga]

When a caregiver (parent, grandparent, nanny, etc) is asking you a question, but directs it at the child (who cannot yet understand/respond) do you answer? Or do you wait for the adult to ask you directly?

Ex: These questions are directed at a new 2 yr old. Adult picks child up and says "Hi Johnny! How was your day? How did you nap?"

[Cat Herder]

I don't.

[hwichlaz]

no, if htey are truly asking the child...I'm not part of the convo and it'd be rude to insert myself. If they are being passive aggressive and asking THROUGH the child I handle it differently.

[Jupadia]

I dont respond verbally bit I do fill out a small report "what I did today" sheet to parent of child for the most part is non verbal.
It just lists diaper changes, supplies needed, what they ate and 2 to 3 things they did that day.

[Baby Beluga]

no, if htey are truly asking the child...I'm not part of the convo and it'd be rude to insert myself. If they are being passive aggressive and asking THROUGH the child I handle it differently.

May I ask how you handle it?

[Baby Beluga]

I dont respond verbally bit I do fill out a small report "what I did today" sheet to parent of child for the most part is non verbal.
It just lists diaper changes, supplies needed, what they ate and 2 to 3 things they did that day.

I have a sheet too. So far I haven't been responding because I feel the same as PP's do - I think it's rude to insert myself. Eye contact is being made with the child who is being asked and the child is being asked directly.

In this particular situation I feel like there is some energy undertone that makes me feel like it is a passive aggressive question to me and I am supposed to answer - instead of just being asked directly. Was just curious what other providers do

[Baby Beluga]

Side note, totally laughing at the "awkward silence" tag. That is exactly what it is! Awkward silence when the adult asks the child (but is really asking me) and I don't answer until I am asked directly.

[Cat Herder]

Or do you wait for the adult to ask you directly?

Ex: These questions are directed at a new 2 yr old. Adult picks child up and says "Hi Johnny! How was your day? How did you nap?"

Now that I have a minute everyone is asleep.

This is a huge pet peeve of mine. ::

I stand with awkward silence until they make direct eye contact with me. This usually prompts them to stop the baby talk, I assume it is my expression, IDK. I then greet them as if they have just arrived and ask for their signature on the sign-out sheet. Conversation flows naturally from there. Most get it pretty quickly.

[Cat Herder]

Side note, totally laughing at the "awkward silence" tag. That is exactly what it is! Awkward silence when the adult asks the child (but is really asking me) and I don't answer until I am asked directly.

That was me. :: Sorry, only had a quick sec to get my thought across earlier.

Awkward silence is an amazing tool when applied correctly.

[springv]

For younger children we do a what I did today sheet and leave it at that

[Baby Beluga]

Now that I have a minute everyone is asleep.

This is a huge pet peeve of mine. ::

I stand with awkward silence until they make direct eye contact with me. This usually prompts them to stop the baby talk, I assume it is my expression, IDK. I then greet them as if they have just arrived and ask for their signature on the sign-out sheet. Conversation flows naturally from there. Most get it pretty quickly.

It is irking me. Speak to me as an adult. I always greet each adult when they arrive. It seems like it would just be a natural progression for the adult to return by greeting and then say "How was DCK today? He did sleep well?"

[missmisty]

Nope. If they have a question for me, they need to ask me. I have no problem occupying myself while they wait for their non-verbal child to answer . I only have one parent who occasionally did this but after a while they stopped since they realized I wouldn't answer direction until spoken to directly.

[Mom2Two]

It's a funny habit some people have. I guess they are uncomfortable being direct? Or maybe they think it's cute. ???

As others said, I probably wouldn't answer. Or if I otherwise liked the person, I might answer the first time then start weaning the adult off the behavior with some comments.

After a few comments where I felt I'd made my point, I think it's a great idea to gracefully exit at that point and let the adult put the shoes on...and have a fantastic one-sided conversation with the little.

[hwichlaz]

May I ask how you handle it?

"I'd appreciate it if you spoke to me directly."

[Blackcat31]

"I'd appreciate it if you spoke to me directly."

I agree.

However, in most cases I think it's just a weird habit that parents have...

I'd probably not reply at all or I'd bluntly ask "Are you actually asking them and expecting an answer or are you really asking me but through them?"

Then again, depending on my smart-alec level at the time I might even reply back also using child as a means of speaking"Say yes, Johnny. Tell mommy you had a great day and that you napped well too. And don't forget to remind mommy to bring Miss BC a check tomorrow as tomorrow is pay day."