I Want to Be Done with This Kid :(

[nannyde]

They’re very aware of his behavior but rely heavily on the “he’s just a really busy kid”. They took him to a Christmas party over the weekend and he knocked over the Christmas tree and broke the top off and then proceeded to scream and thrash for an hour until they finally just left.

Always use the same reason or diagnosis the parent uses. If you want to give a reason why just say "he's just a really busy kid".

[LostMyMarbles]

Sorry that you're having such a hard time with a child. It stinks on our end when we try everything we can, and still can't get positive results. Your sanity is more important then the income coming in from the child.

I was going to terminate a family many years ago. I knew the mom would badmouth me all over social media if I told her the real reason I was getting rid of her two children. I opted to take the easy way out for my reputation, and that was to tell a little white lie. I told her that I was going to be transporting the children to school ,before and after school, and with her children, I simply did not have enough room in the car. I didn't tell her that I was sick and tired of her daughter spoiled little snotty attitude, or her son crying every minute he didn't get his way. I told her I was going on seniority.

Sometimes honesty is not the best policy if it's going to come back and cause problems for you. Instead of coming at them with all negative things, I tend to turn it around on me. I live in a small town, and sure don't need my reputation being trashed on social media.

Good luck, and stay tough. It's always hard when you're dismissing a family.

[littlefriends]

Oh my gosh, honestly, this sounds exactly like the dcb I had. Exactly! I just wondered if when they pick up if they're aware of how he acts for you. I have a friend that has a daycare and has a troubling little girl and when the parents pick up she tells them the day was fine. She doesn't tell them of her troubles with her, which I think is a mistake. I just wondered if you've told them how he is for you. They probably don't ask hahaha because they know.

At first I didn’t. At first I thought it was probably going to get better but now that 7 mo has gone by and I’m seeing the way I feel at the end of each day I no longer try to make the end of day reports sweet and happy. I tell them how many time outs he had (at least 7 or even 10 some days!!) and I’ve even called for early pick up before because of his behavior and crying/fits. They know. I think a center would be better for him so that he’s got more supervision and peers all his own age. I definitely don’t think group care in a home setting is a right fit for him.

[Mom2Two]

Parents who minimize...ugh! And that child's behavior...ugh!!! Your life will feel so wonderful when that child is gone.

I'd be one who tried to communicate (to the extent possible) about the behavior every day. I don't have it in me to go along with the "just busy" line.

I would probably let them know somewhere along the way that their child isn't able to work well with my daycare routine or with the other children. I would probably let them know the part where their child is actually a danger to my home and to other children.

If they blew me off, I think I'd end up letting them know that "regretfully it's just not working out."

This is possibly why I've offended several parents enough that they left.

I've helped children with behavior problems before, but it's really hard when the parents are not on the same page as me. It's hard to get anywhere with the children and the denier-type parents are NEVER grateful.

[Mom2Two]

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Sorry...having problems editing

[Tin Blues]

How did it go?

[littlefriends]

How did it go?

Well I got everything typed up but now my husband is trying to convince me to wait to give it to them until next Friday after Christmas. He says it’s not right to give it to them this Friday. I’m closed Christmas Eve and Christmas so I was planning on giving it to them this Friday at pick up and then not seeing them until next Wednesday. Not sure what to do now as of which Friday to do it?? Any suggestions? It doesn’t help that they gave me $100 in my Christmas card this morning

[lovemykidstoo]

Well I got everything typed up but now my husband is trying to convince me to wait to give it to them until next Friday after Christmas. He says it’s not right to give it to them this Friday. I’m closed Christmas Eve and Christmas so I was planning on giving it to them this Friday at pick up and then not seeing them until next Wednesday. Not sure what to do now as of which Friday to do it?? Any suggestions? It doesn’t help that they gave me $100 in my Christmas card this morning

If it were me and I have been in that situation with a child just like that, I would wait until after the holidays. You probably don't have him much during that time. I also would give them the $100 back when I did term them. I would just feel funny keeping it and then saying oh I'm terming you. Even though you are 1,000% correct in doing so it may look like you waited just to get the cash. Even though you dang sure deserve it!

[rosieteddy]

Are you giving them 2 weeks?If so I would give them notice on Friday28th.That way you are not stressing over Christmas.I would not return your bonus/gift,you put in your time and earned that.

[Blackcat31]

Well I got everything typed up but now my husband is trying to convince me to wait to give it to them until next Friday after Christmas. He says it’s not right to give it to them this Friday. I’m closed Christmas Eve and Christmas so I was planning on giving it to them this Friday at pick up and then not seeing them until next Wednesday. Not sure what to do now as of which Friday to do it?? Any suggestions? It doesn’t help that they gave me $100 in my Christmas card this morning

I understand what your husband is trying to say but there are no "rules" to doing whatever you need to do for sanity reasons.

Your DD could watch them so you don't have too.... !!

In regards to the $100 gift, it seems almost all the daycare parents that have "difficult" kids give the best gifts.

[Ariana]

Your husband doesn’t run your daycare so why does he get a say in it? Is it for financial reasons? My husband can be similar because he just does not get it!

You have to do what you feel comfortable with. I had a kid who I waited WAY too long to terminate. Mainly because the parents were very nice and seemed to want to help the situation. They gave me a crapload of stuff at Christmas which made the situation even worse. In the end I should have termed sooner rather than later because I was enduring a lot of stress just because some people were nice :confused:

[littlefriends]

That’s exactly what I said to him! He doesn’t do much with the daycare and misses a lot. He just hears it at the end of the day when I’m complaining/venting/ranting about it! He would make a terrible manager because it’s literally impossible for him to be strict or stand up to people and he does think I’m being “mean” or “unfair” with the dcf’s often but I generally tell him to butt out. :: Blackcat, yes, I’ve told him to watch them for me if he knows what he’s doing better than I do-I’d love to go take a nap!! I’m going to give them the letter on Wednesday at pick up when we come back next week and I’m going to keep the gift. This kid has already torn up two books and put his hands down the back of his diaper and wiped poop on my kitchen floor today!

[Babymama]

Parents leave him from 7 am when I open to 5:45 every night Mon thru Fri rain or shine even if they’re not working.

Umm I think this is the problem. Please term and PLEASE consider shorter or contracted hours!!!