Would You Even Consider This Child?

[CityGarden]

If you have to hire someone else and will not have additional income, I would just say no, you are full now. If you have a waiting list, you could offer to put them on it if you would like. It does not sounds like a good business decision.

I would not make additional income for May for June I would make money on him here. Sadly I will be marketing soon for those June/September openings so I don't want to lie and her see ads or something. (I will have the open spots in June but am not rushing to fill them over summer)

I do need to think of what to say to her and how to decline though.... good point.

Don't do it.
I accepted a child like this once. Once. 10 years ago.
It sounds like they have been asked to leave the center if she's ready for him to start right away. It takes a lot for a center to ask a client to leave.
I might be reading it wrong, but I would take a pass.

This was my read on her situation as well...

[CityGarden]

I agree.

If it doesn't make a good business decision monetarily when there's already apprehension due to behavior, that would make me say "no thanks" and move on.

Another vote for just say no now. I wouldn’t even go though with the tour as I am a big “I don’t want my time wasted on someone I will never enroll” girl. This is not something you usually do and it will mess up your Fall enrollments plus make next to no profit on adding another child due to needing and assistant. Those facts alone disregarding the fact that he is a hitter/biter would be enough for me to say no. While it’s true that in a different environment he may have no issues I would still say no just due to the other reasons mentioned.

Okay I feel the same way.... gosh I love this forum.

Any suggestions on how to say no thanks since I don't want to lie and say I don't have the space. I actually don't have space until June (unless I have a full time assistant) but soon I will be marketing two spots so I have to be mindful of that.

I think she would just leave potential dcb with the grandparents until June so I don't think that would be a deal breaker (she wanted grandparents to watch him until kinder but he was too much for them which is why she enrolled in preschool at all)

[Josiegirl]

Dear dcm,
After giving your request for child care more thought, I feel my environment would not be the best for your child at this time. Here is the # of the childcare referral system if you need further help. Thank you for giving my daycare consideration and wishing you good luck with your search.

[Blackcat31]

I know you've already decided what you are going to do and in your case, I agree.

I have though had good luck with kids that have behavioral issues that come from centers. I fully believe it was the environment that created the issues.

NOT saying it is that way for every case but I wouldn't automatically rule out a child simply based on that.

I do think there are some other things in this particular situation though that would have warranted passing on.

And the fact that she's blaming the school for the continued biting concerns me - could be legit but having had a biter of my own I do think environment and the teachers play a role (and large class size was a huge factor for my daughter) but aren't the source of the issue.

9 out of 10 times it IS the environment so I disagree and think mom is correct to assume it is the current care environment. Other than seeking a relief from teething and/or oral sensory, what other causes are there?

[Snowmom]

Okay I feel the same way.... gosh I love this forum.

Any suggestions on how to say no thanks since I don't want to lie and say I don't have the space. I actually don't have space until June (unless I have a full time assistant) but soon I will be marketing two spots so I have to be mindful of that.

I think she would just leave potential dcb with the grandparents until June so I don't think that would be a deal breaker (she wanted grandparents to watch him until kinder but he was too much for them which is why she enrolled in preschool at all)

Sine she is so desperate to start ASAP though, I wouldn't think grandparents are looking to watch ALL day and if you don't tell her about June, how would she know? Also, things can change in any business at the drop of a hat, so it's not necessarily suspicious if you advertise for an opening in a couple weeks.

I would say:

Thank you for your interest DCM. At this time, I wouldn't have the staff to enroll DCB (true). However, I do have some contacts for you and believe he may be a better fit in these environments: insert a couple contacts for leads.
I wish you the best of luck and thank you for your interest.

[hwichlaz]

It would totally depend on how full my hands were at the time. If I had room though, I’d probably give him a trial. It sounds like he’s been in large group care. He may be totally different in a small group.

[mommyneedsadayoff]

I know you've already decided what you are going to do and in your case, I agree.

I have though had good luck with kids that have behavioral issues that come from centers. I fully believe it was the environment that created the issues.

NOT saying it is that way for every case but I wouldn't automatically rule out a child simply based on that.

I do think there are some other things in this particular situation though that would have warranted passing on.







9 out of 10 times it IS the environment so I disagree and think mom is correct to assume it is the current care environment. Other than seeking a relief from teething and/or oral sensory, what other causes are there?

I agree. I have met few kids I could not handle, but many parents. If mom is getting kicked out, it could be because she did not adress the issue until it became an issue...as in, she now needs new care because he got kicked out.

But, I agree that a child's behavior can be 100% different depending on who is in charge. We have seen this with how a kid behaves around parents, but many kids misbehave around providers who do not command their space as well. More than a few times, my advice to new providers who don't want to be "mean", is to look at it like authority, not meanness. It is not mean to want the best for a kid, but many providers and parents confuse a kid's reaction (crying) to a situation. They think they were too harsh, but in reality, most of us are not harsh enough. I like young babies, because they grow up knowing what I tolerate and what is over the line. It usually takes nothing more than a look. Every kid craves direction and authority. Bad behavior is usually the result of a kid who has been left to their own devices. They look to me for direction and I give it. At a certain age, they take the control and use what I have taught them to find their path.