Unfriendly Guy

[tenderhearts]

I have a family that started with me a few months ago. I really like the dcb and I really like his mom but the dad is like talking to a brick wall. He has no emotion at all. I think this is how he is and has nothing to do with me but I have had other moms and dad's say hi to him and he doesn't say a thing. It's really uncomfortable, the other parents will give me a look but what can I say. Do you have anyone like this?
The other issue I have with him is he has been told like 3 times to not block the driveway and he does everyday, I swear he has no idea to pull in the driveway I don't get it. When he does it next week I'm going to tell him he needs to park in the street it's so frustrating.
But it's soo uncomfortable to see him every day. I don't know why it bothers me I dont watch him but it does.

[TheMisplacedMidwestMom]

Adult with high functioning autism?

[e.j.]

Adult with high functioning autism?

This was my first thought or possible hearing problem?

[Michael]

Talk to his wife about it. She must have ways of coping with it.

[Josiegirl]

I was thinking his hearing too. There are many times I *think* I know what somebody said and act like I do but realize what they said wasn't what I thought they said. Depends on the situation and background noise around. I think I would also talk with the dcm and see if maybe he's just that way. Another thing I am, is terribly socially inept which can lead to issues also(and has gotten so much worse in my older years and being in such an isolating job). Just ask dcm.

[DaveA]

Talk to his wife about it. She must have ways of coping with it.

I would go this route. Whatever the reason approach it as wanting to make sure they know both DCM and DCD are equally valued as clients.

As for the driveway I would talk to DCM first then explain to DCD what you need him to do at pickup.

[Blackcat31]

I guess I don't see an issue...

I don't necessarily socialize with my daycare parents.
If we need to discuss something about their child, I usually just tell them (both parents) the info and vice versa but that's it.

I have a couple parents that I would personally define as "odd" but as long as it doesn't interfere with daycare business I don't care or worry about it.

I have one parent in particular that is very similar to what the OP described but I guess I don't give it a second thought. Other parents have said hello and tried to strike up a conversation with them but it usually falls flat as the parent rarely looks others in the eye and speaks so softly they are hard to hear let alone understand but again... I guess I don't see it as a problem.

I don't feel uncomfortable about pick up or drop off because the focus is on the kids so again, the parent's "oddness" is not an issue..... truth be told in one way or another I think all parents are odd now days.

[daycarediva]

I would prefer this to the chatting parents.

Seriously though, I would be really upfront, since there IS an issue that you need to convey re: the driveway. "Hi DCD! I'm not sure if you heard me last week. I need you to pull your car ____________ at pick up every day. Thanks!" and walk away.

If he doesn't get it- then tell dcm.

I have a dcd that doesn't speak to me AT ALL and his kid is crazy chatty. I just talk like I know he's understanding and hope he's just shy or awkward.

[Mom2Two]

Seriously though, I would be really upfront, since there IS an issue that you need to convey re: the driveway. "Hi DCD! I'm not sure if you heard me last week. I need you to pull your car ____________ at pick up every day. Thanks!" and walk away.

If he doesn't get it- then tell dcm.

Yeah, sometimes talking to the spouse helps a lot.

And I hope he's not just a jerk!

[Cat Herder]

When you told him to not block the driveway, did you tell him where you expect him to park? I have two 19 year old *men and telling them what not to do isn't enough, sometimes. :: They need to be told, specifically, what they are expected to do. Clearly. Photo directions are a bonus.

Their heads are in a million other directions.

[Josiegirl]

When you told him to not block the driveway, did you tell him where you expect him to park? I have two 19 year old *men and telling them what not to do isn't enough, sometimes. :: They need to be told, specifically, what they are expected to do. Clearly. Photo directions are a bonus.

Their heads are in a million other directions.

Or get one of those flag-wavers like from an airport. ::

As far as dcds who don't talk to you....I have 1 also but I don't see him very often. He dropped in yesterday to give me a check and handed the check to his ds to give to me, never even saying 1 word to me. He never does. That's okay, as long as he talks with his ds. He and the dcm are in a custody battle and the dcm is always berating dcd. I need to be careful not to get into the middle of it all.

[Hunni Bee]

I have a mom like this.

On her good days she will smile and banter back and forth a bit.

On other (most) days she literally pushes dcb into the room while standing in the hallway and is gone before the door closes completely. If you happen to be near the door, she wont make eye contact, return your greeting, etc.

I just guessed either significant social anxiety or Asperger's. I don't push it. Dad's friendly enough for both of them.

[AmyKidsCo]

I have a set of parents that are very quiet and don't talk much at drop off or pick up. I'm not sure if they're shy or if it's because they were at a group center for the past 9 mos and aren't used to a lot of chit chat.

[tenderhearts]

thanks I guess I could talk to dcm when I see her, she just had a baby though. I enjoy getting to know my daycare clients, I mean most of them, I think it's more awkward when they don't talk, I would think they would want to get to know me to, I mean heck I watch their kid.
Oh and their son is very talkative, not shy at all.