I have a child, 4.5, has been here for 2 years. When the child started, 1-2 days/week she had a HUGE issue with separating from parents. Cried for a good hour every time. Parents said it happened at home, too. With Mom, Dad, grandparents and sitters. Then had a hard time eating, playing, etc. We discussed a child psych consult. Parents saw it as typical separation anxiety (imho it was NOT) It improved enough for me to stick it out. At only 1-2x/week it was manageable.
On days child attended, my program was tweaked. Outside time was reduced-child was afraid of everything- grass, worms, sunburns, frostbite, snow, cars driving by, bugs flying, you name it. She spent the majority of outside play at the door. I had to prep EVERYTHING in advance. IF I left the room to pee- child would SCREAM at the top of her lungs and was difficult to console.
I REALLY worked with her- and it was improving - slowly. I AGAIN suggested more days. Parents FINALLY agreed in Sept of this year to more days (for the prek ONLY since she was 4)
Attendance went to FT. Child changed overnight. Literally within a week child was not crying at drop off, having to be pulled out of here at the end of the day, happy all day, no issues.
Until this week. NOTHING has changed here (except for another child's parents divorcing-but the worst of that is over for the other dck)
Now she's back to original behavior, only she is FT. I again, suggested a psychologist get involved, as I have exhausted all of my avenues. I also feel that some of it it could very well be attention seeking behavior. When she is upset- she is babied beyond belief. It is at home, too. Parents can't leave the room, go to bed, bathroom, etc. without a total meltdown. This child's ENTIRE day is spent so worried and anxious she is having BM accidents, stomachaches, headaches, can't eat, sleep, you name it.
I am done at the end of June, so parents will be receiving notice the first of June anyway.
ANY ideas? The parents are on board with suggestions, and have been reading books about parents leaving and coming back, missing parents, feeling scared, sad, worried, etc etc. They already have a goodbye outside routine, but after it, I just take dcg because she gets increasingly worked up and will NEVER calm down with either parent present. I feel like drawing more attention to it is only making it worse, but parents REFUSE to believe it's anything more than separation anxiety, and that she will outgrow it, it is just 'how she is', proof of how great a bond she has with them ( opposite, IMHO-well bonded children don't have issues separating!) etc
I have already flat out said that she will not do well in K or larger Prek settings. We can't have fire drills without a week of her worrying about fires (and screaming over the alarm) she cannot handle men/other teachers/strangers, she cannot do ANYTHING alone, so walking down the hall to her classroom, or from the classroom to the restroom? OH HECK NO.
Things I've tried-
reassurance (she just continues to bring up worries, it's NEVER ENDING)
separating until calm (she cannot calm down, so she will sit there ALL DAY)
ignoring (I won't give her any attention when screaming, I will speak to her like nothing ever happened when she's calm- seems to work the best, but now she tells her parents I'm mean, and they think it's cruel to ignore her cries but uh, she's always crying!)
and she's the oldest, and I have a 19mo who is FINE.
On days child attended, my program was tweaked. Outside time was reduced-child was afraid of everything- grass, worms, sunburns, frostbite, snow, cars driving by, bugs flying, you name it. She spent the majority of outside play at the door. I had to prep EVERYTHING in advance. IF I left the room to pee- child would SCREAM at the top of her lungs and was difficult to console.
I REALLY worked with her- and it was improving - slowly. I AGAIN suggested more days. Parents FINALLY agreed in Sept of this year to more days (for the prek ONLY since she was 4)
Attendance went to FT. Child changed overnight. Literally within a week child was not crying at drop off, having to be pulled out of here at the end of the day, happy all day, no issues.
Until this week. NOTHING has changed here (except for another child's parents divorcing-but the worst of that is over for the other dck)
Now she's back to original behavior, only she is FT. I again, suggested a psychologist get involved, as I have exhausted all of my avenues. I also feel that some of it it could very well be attention seeking behavior. When she is upset- she is babied beyond belief. It is at home, too. Parents can't leave the room, go to bed, bathroom, etc. without a total meltdown. This child's ENTIRE day is spent so worried and anxious she is having BM accidents, stomachaches, headaches, can't eat, sleep, you name it.
I am done at the end of June, so parents will be receiving notice the first of June anyway.
ANY ideas? The parents are on board with suggestions, and have been reading books about parents leaving and coming back, missing parents, feeling scared, sad, worried, etc etc. They already have a goodbye outside routine, but after it, I just take dcg because she gets increasingly worked up and will NEVER calm down with either parent present. I feel like drawing more attention to it is only making it worse, but parents REFUSE to believe it's anything more than separation anxiety, and that she will outgrow it, it is just 'how she is', proof of how great a bond she has with them ( opposite, IMHO-well bonded children don't have issues separating!) etc
I have already flat out said that she will not do well in K or larger Prek settings. We can't have fire drills without a week of her worrying about fires (and screaming over the alarm) she cannot handle men/other teachers/strangers, she cannot do ANYTHING alone, so walking down the hall to her classroom, or from the classroom to the restroom? OH HECK NO.
Things I've tried-
reassurance (she just continues to bring up worries, it's NEVER ENDING)
separating until calm (she cannot calm down, so she will sit there ALL DAY)
ignoring (I won't give her any attention when screaming, I will speak to her like nothing ever happened when she's calm- seems to work the best, but now she tells her parents I'm mean, and they think it's cruel to ignore her cries but uh, she's always crying!)
and she's the oldest, and I have a 19mo who is FINE.
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