Tell Parents About Time-Out?

[Boymom]

Do you tell parents about every single time you put a kid in "thinking time"?

[Cat Herder]

No.

I tell them about issues if I need their help with something.

Normal, age appropriate behaviors often require redirection.

If, as a parent, my provider was telling me every minor infraction I would assume she/he was overwhelmed and did not like my child. At least that is what it generally feels like to a parent.

[spedmommy4]

No. And whether or not I mentioned any correction here would depend on the severity and the child. Minor things I wouldn't mention at all. Issues with aggressive behavior get discussed as they arise.

That said, I have one ultra sensitive dcb3 who cries if he has to take a break. He rarely gets in trouble, but I do tell his mom every time. If I don't, he will spill the beans the second mom arrives. (And his story is usually way more interesting than mine :: )

[Boymom]

Thank you both! I have a dcd that wants me to tell him whenever I put his son in time out, but I don't think it's important to tell him when it's typical 3yo stuff!

[Cat Herder]

It is possible that DCD and you may be miscommunicating a bit with the difference between discipline and punishment.

In the past, "Time out" was punishment for major offenses. Sitting in the corner was dreaded.

Now a "quiet spot" is where kids go to cool down, read a book, play alone in personal space until they are less frustrated or over stimulated. AKA a discipline technique. Kids go there on their own when they need a break from their "friends".

To discipline = To teach. To teach emotional control.

Many of us "Old school" providers struggled with the new vocabulary at one time or another... why wouldn't parents raised old school struggle with the same concept? ::::

[Controlled Chaos]

I had to seperate a 2yo from the group 5 times the other day. He was taking toys and not sharing in general. I told dad at pickup.

"Here is JJ's painting from today, he used so so many beautiful colors. He did have an extra hard time sharing today. We are working on asking friends if we can play with them when we want to share a toy. I can't wait to see you tomorrow, we'll have a great day!"

Unless it is a super serious issue I need parents to help with - that's how I deal.

[childcaremom]

I had to seperate a 2yo from the group 5 times the other day. He was taking toys and not sharing in general. I told dad at pickup.

"Here is JJ's painting from today, he used so so many beautiful colors. He did have an extra hard time sharing today. We are working on asking friends if we can play with them when we want to share a toy. I can't wait to see you tomorrow, we'll have a great day!"

Unless it is a super serious issue I need parents to help with - that's how I deal.

Much the same. I just write a little note on their sheet, example: needed a lot of reminders today.

I get concerned if it's completely out of the ordinary behaviour and/or more serious. Then I will have a chat with the parents about it.

[JackandJill]

Only if its something I need worked on at home.

[Blackcat31]

No.

I tell them about issues if I need their help with something.

Normal, age appropriate behaviors often require redirection.

If, as a parent, my provider was telling me every minor infraction I would assume she/he was overwhelmed and did not like my child. At least that is what it generally feels like to a parent.

I also don't use time out or a thinking spot or any type of "sit" time as a consequence.

[Boymom]

I also don't use time out or a thinking spot or any type of "sit" time as a consequence.

What do you do? I need all the help I can get with this kid! I repeat and redirect all day long!!

[Unregistered]

I wonder if dcd doesn't agree with the style of guidance. Obviously, yes, they signed the contract agreeing to it so that was their own fault. But, I haven't worked anywhere in the past 15 years that allow either 'time out' or 'thinking alone'...

[Blackcat31]

What do you do? I need all the help I can get with this kid! I repeat and redirect all day long!!

Tell me some of the behaviors you are having to use time out for....

[Thriftylady]

I only involve parents if it is a serious issue (such as violence) or a repeated issue that needs solved (biting, throwing, etc.). Other than that, no I don't tell parents every little thing. My kids are old enough to tell parents but not sure they do. I don't want to hear everything the parents do or discipline for at home, I figure they don't need that every day either.

[daycarediva]

I use time out ONLY when a child hits. "If you hit, you sit." Then we have a chat about it, make amends (no forced apologies here though) and model what we can do in the future.

I do put all incidents of aggression on daily sheets. Hitting is a HUGE deal here and essentiallly the ONLY thing I punish for. Everything else is 'direction'.

[Boymom]

Tell me some of the behaviors you are having to use time out for....

He yanks toys out of other kids hands many times a day, he pushes, and he runs around all the time! (A big rule in my house is they can't run because I have crawling babies and I'm also afraid someone will fall and get hurt.) Well, he fell today of course! We spend a lot of time outside, so he has plenty of time to run around!! So it's little stuff, but it's constant. Drives me cray cray !