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I have a great little guy (recently turned 2), who is super sweet and aims to please. He has awesome parents that encourage independence and are incredibly supportive. Mom is due with her second child, and this little guy has been experiencing a roller coaster of emotions lately. If he hears the word "mom" he immediately starts to sob. He is very articulate and gets very emotional when he talks about the new baby. I'm interested in any strategies you all have to offer around self-soothing strategies or general tips to get him through this exciting, but tough time. Thanks so much!
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Can you get a picture of her, laminate it and let him carry it around? Or a glove or other personal item of hers? Otherwise, I'd keep reassuring him she'll be there soon to pick him up, ask questions like what's Mommy making you for supper, or something similar. Have him draw a picture for her, asking what's her favorite color, etc., maybe it'd help to keep him talking about her while he's drawing, how much she'll love the picture. Try to put a positive spin on seeing mommy at the end of his playing time.
That's all I've got.
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Agree with Josie. If I have one who is homesick, I say things to assure them that they will be going home that day. The "what's mommy making you for dinner tonight?" almost always helps. It conveys to them that I'm confident they will be picked up, so they become more confident about it too. Then we have a little discussion about mom's cooking and does she wear an apron? Do you like mommy's dinners? What's your favorite one? Does daddy have a favorite? Etc, etc.
For new baby, there are lots of great books for his age group about bringing home a new baby. I would definitely start there. Also, playing with baby dolls. Show him how to be gentle with the baby doll and to never pick the baby up without a grown up's help. Playing with baby dolls is a great way to get his feet wet.Comment
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Pictures help a lot! I always encourage parents to bring photos of themselves and anyone else the child spends time with. I took a lot of those pics and made collages with them for our wall. One little girl would eat lunch with her mom and dads picture every day! So cute
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I would also have a conversation with dcm to try and figure out his feelings about the upcoming new baby. At 2 yo, it's really hard for them to process what's going on, what's going to happen, what he can expect, no matter how articulate they are. Maybe he's afraid Mommy's going to get hurt, wonders why her tummy is big, what the baby will be like or do. Our ideas as adults are oh so different than a 2 yo, who knows how he's thinking of it all. This is such a foreign idea to a child. You can't exactly comprehend this by stacking one block on top of another.
See if you can get into a conversation with dcb about it all, maybe role-play with the dolls.
And there again, try to put a positive spin on his new baby brother or sister, by having him paint a bright picture for the baby to look at while their diaper is being changed. And I wonder what he has been told by his parents about what's going to happen; how he may have twisted something and make it scary in his own 2 yo mind.
He's probably also sensed tension, whether it's happy or nervous, it's still different feelings than he's use to. Like something is way out of whack with his emotional routine, KWIM?Comment
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Thank you all so, so much! I so appreciate the support, and can't wait to try out many of these suggestions!!Comment
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