My DD Is The Biter, What Do I Do?

[Alwaysgreener]

My dd is the biter. I have gotten her to lessen how often she does it but can not get her to stop. Help

[daycare]

I don't really have any experience with bitters, but I know that others on here have given some great advice.

If you search biting, I am sure tons of post will come up.

how old is your child?

[Alwaysgreener]

I don't really have any experience with bitters, but I know that others on here have given some great advice.

If you search biting, I am sure tons of post will come up.

how old is your child?

3 - I believe a previous DCG taught her to.

[daycare]

Is she always biting the same person ?

[racemom]

The first thing to do is recognize why she bites and try to intervene when you see the issue starting. At 3 I feel she is old enought to understand it is wrong. I work with 1 and 2 year olds and what I do with them is explain to her if she bites her friends, she will..and then tell her the consequence. Sometimes you have to up the currency until you find what works. But be consistent, and if you see her starting to try to bite, sharply say her name to stop her and then remind her if we bite our friends, you will have to sit out or whatever the punishment. Also tell her biting hurts her friends and she cannot hurt friends, if she bites someone and leaves a mark show it to her while saying look, you hurt susie. Also, make sure victim gets all the attention, not the biter. Sometimes it is for attention even if it is negative attention
I have 2 in my current class who have gone thru this stage, and one will still bite when I am gone and have a sub. She is 19 months old, and is very aware that it is not allowed, so she tests the subs to see what they will do.

[Alwaysgreener]

The first thing to do is recognize why she bites and try to intervene when you see the issue starting. At 3 I feel she is old enought to understand it is wrong. I work with 1 and 2 year olds and what I do with them is explain to her if she bites her friends, she will..and then tell her the consequence. Sometimes you have to up the currency until you find what works. But be consistent, and if you see her starting to try to bite, sharply say her name to stop her and then remind her if we bite our friends, you will have to sit out or whatever the punishment. Also tell her biting hurts her friends and she cannot hurt friends, if she bites someone and leaves a mark show it to her while saying look, you hurt susie. Also, make sure victim gets all the attention, not the biter. Sometimes it is for attention even if it is negative attention
I have 2 in my current class who have gone thru this stage, and one will still bite when I am gone and have a sub. She is 19 months old, and is very aware that it is not allowed, so she tests the subs to see what they will do.

That is a great idea, I will start showing here the marks.

DD is 3

She will bite when attacked. When DCG would pinch her and be mean to her in another way, dd bites back. dd bites DCB 1.5 when he steals a toy from her and she cant get it back, then she bites.
I send her to her room, check the child over for the bite. (sometimes, I do not find the bite, most times the bite light enough it will fade before the child goes home. I still let DCM know)
DCG has bit my dd (really hard) so I remind her of that bite and talk about it hurting her.
I do call her name to stop her but it is not always soon enough.

DCM is afraid that DCB is learning to bite. She says that he has started to bite her clothes. I do not want this sweet boy to start biting.

[racemom]

So she is biting in retaliation, which is easier to deal with usually. Give her other ways to express her displeasure with dcb taking her toy, and help her to get it back. As for the pincher, I would place her in time out for pinching and make sure your dd knows that is why she is going. If she knows you will take care of the situation, she will begin to realize she gets what she wants, toy back-not being pinched, by letting you know it has happened. If you haven't already, tell dd to let you know when things happen and you will help her out. When she bites, makes sure she now doesn't get her toy back, tell her now you hurt dcb so you can no longer play with it.

[Alwaysgreener]

So she is biting in retaliation, which is easier to deal with usually. Give her other ways to express her displeasure with dcb taking her toy, and help her to get it back. As for the pincher, I would place her in time out for pinching and make sure your dd knows that is why she is going. If she knows you will take care of the situation, she will begin to realize she gets what she wants, toy back-not being pinched, by letting you know it has happened. If you haven't already, tell dd to let you know when things happen and you will help her out. When she bites, makes sure she now doesn't get her toy back, tell her now you hurt dcb so you can no longer play with it.

Thank you, this info is so reassuring that I am doing the right things. (the pincher has been termed, so that is no longer an issue.)

I did some research yesterday as well and some of what I read on, says that biting is normal for kids to explore but a child that bites is singled out / treated worse over the child that hits or pinches or even bulling sometimes. That a parent tends to be more embarrassed that their child bites over the child that does something else.

[Michael]

More threads on biting: https://www.daycare.com/forum/showthread.php?t=6

[Alwaysgreener]

a partail win

My dd has stopped biting her friends and now started biting her things. Toys, blankets and clothes when she is mad. It is not a complete win but I will take it.