How Do You Handle Playing DR?

[Unregistered]

Do you have rules in place for this? I have an almost 5 year old who is obsessed with playing Dr. She is constantly lifting the kids' shirts to "check them out" sometimes pulling the wastebands down a bit as well, asking them to lay down & prop their feet up, scratch/tickling their bellies, poking belly buttons, etc. I'm constantly redirecting. It just seems inappropriate to me. What do you think? Should I set some specific rules in place like no lifting shirts, no laying down, etc or just do away with the Dr kit altogether? Hate to put it up b/c she plays with it all day long, but I'm tired of feeling like I can't take my eyes off of her with it too. Maybe I'm overanalyzing. I had a friend over a couple years ago & her dd was playing Dr with my 2 year old & pulled his pants down and grabbed him. I was right there & stopped her immediately, but I'm paranoid about this now.
After thought, maybe I can limit it to checking out the stuffed animals? Help me find some perspective here.

[Silly Songs]

Stuffed animals , dolls etc . If she wants to check others , limit it to temperature, blood pressure and safe zones . Explain that we do not go under another child's clothing for any reason. It helps the kids to find their voice about these issues too !

[Second Home]

I limit playing Dr to only giving a check up to dolls , stuffed animals or puppets .

[childcaremom]

I limit playing Dr to only giving a check up to dolls , stuffed animals or puppets .

This is the route I would take, as well. I would def. be putting a stop to it.

[cheerfuldom]

I would say no DR. on the younger kids, toys only. If she cant handle that, put the game away for now. It is not uncommon for kids her age to get obsessed with one activity.

[DaveA]

I limit playing Dr to only giving a check up to dolls , stuffed animals or puppets .

I do the same thing.

[Blackcat31]

I've been in this job for 20+ years and for whatever reason, I've never really had kids that play any kind of Dr other than playing vet.

[lblanke]

I saw some great advice on Dr. Phil about naked kids...I think the same applies to their playing doctor.

•Relax. This is not a sexual behavior in any way. This is a free, unrestricted, natural and normal behavior. They are simply curious, and it's not bizarre. It's not relevant to them. Kids don't understand what being naked means....This doesn't mean you can't stop or limit it at your house, but kids do not attach the same values to it that adults do.

•Don't send a negative message by being too rigid about it. You don't want your child to think they are bad or dirty...Still ok to stop it at your house, but don't make them feel ashamed.

•You do want to socialize your child. You have to teach them certain standards, like not getting naked in public, eating with their fingers, etc.

•If you want to suppress the behavior, supervise them closely and communicate to them that they can't do that. But don't overreact. Tell them, "Put your clothes back on" in the same manner you would say, "Don't climb on the counter."

[Michael]

More threads on Playing Doctor: https://www.daycare.com/forum/tags.p...playing+doctor

[Play Care]

I've been in this job for 20+ years and for whatever reason, I've never really had kids that play any kind of Dr other than playing vet.

While my kids do play doc with each other, there has never been anything concerning about it. It's taking temps, blood pressure, listening to hearts over clothing, etc.

But I do have a rule that "clothes stay ON at Mrs. K's house" (nothing to do with doctor play:: ) and that means shirts stay down, pants stay put, etc.

It sounds as if she needs you to show her appropriate ways to play with the kit, and remind her. If she continues to do lift shirts or poke/tickle, etc. Then I would put it up for a bit.

[Blackcat31]

I saw some great advice on Dr. Phil about naked kids...I think the same applies to their playing doctor.

•Relax. This is not a sexual behavior in any way. This is a free, unrestricted, natural and normal behavior. They are simply curious, and it's not bizarre. It's not relevant to them. Kids don't understand what being naked means....This doesn't mean you can't stop or limit it at your house, but kids do not attach the same values to it that adults do.

•Don't send a negative message by being too rigid about it. You don't want your child to think they are bad or dirty...Still ok to stop it at your house, but don't make them feel ashamed.

•You do want to socialize your child. You have to teach them certain standards, like not getting naked in public, eating with their fingers, etc.

•If you want to suppress the behavior, supervise them closely and communicate to them that they can't do that. But don't overreact. Tell them, "Put your clothes back on" in the same manner you would say, "Don't climb on the counter."

While I agree with this as a provider, I know that as soon as a parent hears a word relating to anything sexual or anything that "could be" sexualized, they freak. I get being concerned and being careful but I've know of a few examples that were so normal and not at all sexual but a parent took it to extremes...

For example, my area YMCA offers swim lessons to daycare in the area. One little boy was so excited to be able to participate (you have to wear underwear ad be 3 yrs old) that he was showing the other kids his "proof" that he was old enough to go (his Spiderman underwear)...well it got back to a parent of another participant that a boy was pulling down his pants telling others to "look!" Of course, the parent thought all sorts of hinky stuff happening at the YMCA and that this little boy should be banned from participating etc etc...

The parent perception of the situation was SO FAR off from the reality of the situation that although we can do everything you mentioned in your post....parents rarely see things that same way and instead panic.

[Rockgirl]

I just say "keep shirts down" if they try to lift one--it really hasn't been an issue here.

[MarinaVanessa]

I limit playing Dr to only giving a check up to dolls , stuffed animals or puppets .

Same here.

[daycarediva]

While my kids do play doc with each other, there has never been anything concerning about it. It's taking temps, blood pressure, listening to hearts over clothing, etc.

But I do have a rule that "clothes stay ON at Mrs. K's house" (nothing to do with doctor play:: ) and that means shirts stay down, pants stay put, etc.

It sounds as if she needs you to show her appropriate ways to play with the kit, and remind her. If she continues to do lift shirts or poke/tickle, etc. Then I would put it up for a bit.

Clothes stay on. If she didn't get it after a few reminders, I would limit it to stuffed animals and toys only. I wouldn't restrict her play and take it away unless I couldn't stop the behavior in any other way.

[Play Care]

The parent perception of the situation was SO FAR off from the reality of the situation that although we can do everything you mentioned in your post....parents rarely see things that same way and instead panic

This.

And this also highlights the difference between day care/provider and home/parents. Those are great tips - for PARENTS. If I as a dc provider had kids removing clothing to play doctor, I would be mortified. Not because of the act- but because it would mean that I was not doing my job.

The most very basic, fundamental aspect of this job is SUPERVISION. Part of my thought process the entire work day is "how can I do this and still supervise everyone adequately?" Sometimes it means putting kids "up" or assigning certain spots to older kids, etc. As a parent I can tell my kids to "go play" and have them out of my sight. I can't do that as a provider.

I don't think the OP here had anything to do with kids "playing doctor/show me yours, I'll show you mine" but more so a child who is in need of some boundaries (poking, tickling, etc.)