Slander....Need Advice

[Sprouts]

Ok so i wrote a previous thread back in July about this situation which you can read here if you like https://www.daycare.com/forum/showthread.php?t=47469

to basically sum it up, a woman decided not to bring her child to my childcare because she thought the kids played too rough, i gave her a partial refund, she wasnt happy about that....

so today i asked one of my parents to wrtie a review about my program on yellow pages, and then we came across this!!

Unless you want your child to learn rough playing as an infant don't even go there. Their paper work is crazy. Also if you are formula feeding you have to bring the formula and baby food every morning with you. Wipes being brought ever week, payment due every Friday by 1 or get a late fee. Soil clothes are sent back home dirty in a ziplock bag you have to provide. The owner is very money oriented and will keep your money in a snap shot. She also takes your kids to places like costco etc to run errands while in her care. She is not there all the time and a young girl watches the kids when she is out. The place is extremely small and must bring new bottles every day because she has no place to store it. If you dare to try it, read well the contract and fees (the later you pick up your child the more money you are committing to pay); also ask for an acclamation for your child when ALL kids are awake and interacting. She will try to have you come in during quite time by making herself unavailable at other times, do not accept it.... otherwise you wont get the true story. I brought my child for a 45 minutes introduction before his start date, but when I saw an 18 months old boy stepping his foot on an 13 months old girl' head and belly, the girl pulling his hair and wrestling all the time I was there, and in the presence of the owner it led to me believe that this is an ongoing activity they have master to enjoy and that discipline and concerns of liability were not being considered in that place. For this reason alone, I decided not to bring my son in. When I told her, she didn't explain herself at all and told me that I was simply over reacting with the rough playing I witnessed and kept 50% of my deposit and charged me 30 dollars for the 45 minutes I brought my son in to drop his things off and get him acclimated. I didn't sue her for ALL of my money ONLY because she is an expectant mother.

The following is not true and I feel is SLander...

The owner is very money oriented and will keep your money in a snap shot. She also takes your kids to places like costco etc to run errands while in her care. She is not there all the time and a young girl watches the kids when she is out. The place is extremely small and must bring new bottles every day because she has no place to store it.

As far as the rough play between the children i spoke about that on the thread i posted in the beginning of this thread.

how would some of you handle this...i obviously want to be the better person here and not stoop down to her level, but this comment has been up since July!! and I just saw it, so Imagine how many people have decided NOT to call because of this.

[EchoMom]

I'm so sorry this is happening to you. I wish I had advice to offer but I don't. I'm going through the same thing. I recently termed 2 families and both are slandering me and it's completely disgusting and not fair. One is telling people word of mouth that I termed her with short notice, but I gave her one week notice as per our contract and deposit amount! She chose to forfeit her final week and not come at all, but she's telling people and I've lost a new client specifically because this person spread this about me.

The 2nd just wrote a terrible review about me on Care.com and then somehow Care.com mysteriously closed my account completely and I can only assume the parent reported me or lied about me or something.

It's awful awful awful what these people do to us. I don't understand, they think we're not human??? They don't think about our kids we're just trying to provide for too??? It's terrible and I'm right in the middle of this junk too, I'm so sorry.

I wish I could help, all I can do is comiserate.

[Sprouts]

well hopefully the responses we get are helpful...i am already thinking of getting a lawyer because this is illegal...and yes because of their selfish actions it DOES affect us, we support our families and pay for the roofs over our heads with the money we earn from paying families. People are just so selfish and self centered. I am not even surprised by her actions.

and whenever someone does something that is just plain wrong i think of this

And God saw that the wickedness of man was great in the earth, and that every imagination of the thoughts of his heart was only evil continually.
Genesis 6:5

[MyAngels]

The first thing I would do is address it with the website & try to get them to take it down.

The next thing I'd do is write a strongly worded cease and desist letter to the person who wrote it in the first place. MarinaVanessa had a good one in this thread: https://www.daycare.com/forum/showth...t=cease+desist. Send it certified, with a return receipt.

If that doesn't take care of it I'd contact a lawyer.

Good luck and keep us posted.

[TheMonkeyFam]

Can you post a reply? I would either reply or ask the website to take down the review. If you reply I would state your policies. I would also call a lawyer and find out what you can do. I'm sorry you are going through this. It is awful when people post bad things about you publicly without thinking you are a person.

[countrymom]

first see if the web site will do something
second, write a reply to it.

this is why I don't interview when children are around. This happened once to me too (the kids where rough) and I was so embarressed and you can't control kids when someone comes to the house.

also, I'm careful where I post about my business because someplaces won't do anything and I don't want anyone to write about my daycare on it.

[Angelsj]

You have another review by what I assume is a parent, refuting the claims. You can also reply as the business or flag for abuse. I would try those things as a start and also thank the other parent for her review (as a business response.) Most people understand there are always disgruntled customers, but hopefully the site will remove it for you, as it is a bit ridiculous in its claims.

[MamaG]

To prove slander in court is very hard to do. I would start by getting a free consultation with a local attorney. Go from there. You can pay fees and the attorney will write a letter asking her to remove her lies or face court, that's the cheapest way to go. If that doesn't work you have to take it before a judge. The attorney can tell you what's the best course of action to take in your area. You can also contact the website and request it be removed.

[Thetotspot]

Going through the whole slander thing too from somebody I have never even met.

One of my dc parents was asked at work who she uses for daycare by someboy searching for summer care. When my daycare parent answered the lady retorted "I have heard such terrible things about that place, that lady is so crazy and your child is not safe there".

Thankfully my parent replied with "Well I wouldnt bother calling her, she is probably full because there is no tv and she actually does activities with the kids and my daughter is smarter than other kids her age because of it."

After going through my records because the lady's last name sounded familiar...I found I had interviewed her sister before I was licensed. I told her if she wanted the spot she had to call by the following tuesday (10 days from interview) or I would fill the spot because I had another opening allowing me to take a family of 2.

She called 3 weeks later and I no longer had an opening so she must have been angry and her sister decided to trash me for it.

This was 6 months ago and I wonder if I have lost business from it in our small town but I'm being the bigger woman here. Calling them out would probably make me look just as crazy as she tells people I am. So hopefully it will blow over and nobody will listen to her since I have such amazing families that appreciate me.

But it sure does strike a nerve. We put ourselves on the line...open our homes...and give families clear expectations...and when they ignore them and it affects them...they blame us. Grr.

Sorry about typos. My phone doesnt let me see screen in full so I have a hard time finding and fixing. :-(

[Sprouts]

Well I decided to write a nice email to her...I figure kill em with kindness first....I wrote the following

I hope all is well. I am writing this letter because I recently came across a review on yellow pages written by you in July. I am sorry that we have had our differences but I am hurt to read such a thing. I hope you can understand that this is our income, this business that you are writing about is how I help support my family. I can only imagine how many people have come across this from July until now and decided not to call because of this one review?? Some of the things that are on there are not even correct as well.

I don't want to go into detail and make this a back and forth thing. I know when people are angry we tend to do or say not such nice things in the heat of the moment.

I am writing to ask you to kindly remove this ad and any other comments or reviews you may have posted that I may not have come across. Just please try and put yourself in my shoes. I would greatly appreciate it. Thank you.

Anyone with some sort of conscience would hopefully respond kindly to this....if not then PLAN B...cease and desist letter....N if that doesn't work PLAN C....lawyer....

[MarinaVanessa]

I hope that she rethinks her post and decides to take it down on her own accord however I would count your chickens yet. I don't believe that the email is strong enough or sounded confident enough ... please don't take this personal, this is only my personal opinion.

KUP. How long will you give her before you send her a cease to desist letter?

[melilley]

How terrible! I'm sorry you have to go through this! First off, some of the things that lady said such as bringing bottles everyday are a licensing requirement in my state. And as for the dirty clothes in a bag, it's a health hazard, especially in there is urine or feces on the clothing, to use your own sink or whatever to clean a child's clothing, I did the same thing. She must not have used wipes very often, you do go through a lot if you use on every time you change a diaper! And as for the rough play, she doesn't know that that is one way that children learn (rough and tumble play) I'm not saying beat each other up, but people who do not work in this field do not realize that sometimes children can be aggressive (for lack of a better word) with one another, whether it be that hug that was a little too hard or that accidental hair pull or step and that most of the time, the children don't even realize that they are hurting one another. That is expected especially when the dck's are around each other day after day. This parent must only have one child! Also, people just don't realize that we do (in my state) have licensing rules that we have to comply with and if we don't we could lose our license. If she didn't like your requirements then she shouldn't have signed the contract in the first place! I hope you can get this resolved, I don't even know you and I'm angry at that woman... With what you said and what other posters have said, it's scary to think that this can happen, especially when you don't have a chance to defend yourself, like on the website.

[Sprouts]

thank you for all of the responses. And for everyone going through the same thing, u know i feel ur pain.

I am giving her until monday, if i get no response i will be sending a certified letter.

[Sprouts]

So I was able to contact yellow pages and have the review removed, but I am still thinking of sending a cease and desist letter just to basically let her know not to continue slandering my business, whether it be by word of mouth or on the internet....what do you guys think?

[MyAngels]

So I was able to contact yellow pages and have the review removed, but I am still thinking of sending a cease and desist letter just to basically let her know not to continue slandering my business, whether it be by word of mouth or on the internet....what do you guys think?

Good for them for removing the review happyface. I would still send a cease and desist letter, and would even consider paying an attorney to send it just so she knows you mean business.