DCM is Setting Herself Up for Disaster!

[crazydaycarelady]

I may have contributed to this unfortunately. Dcm has a long drive so I told her that she could bring dcg in pjs. I assumed she would also bring clothes so I could change her later.

Anyway, she brings her 2yo child everyday in pajamas, no underwear, shoes but no socks, and hair in a messy tangle. My contract does say that kids need to be ready for the day and technically she is ready, just not presentable. Dcm brings her this way to avoid a fight with her. Does dcm not realize how she is settng herself up for later?

Yesterday to prove a point I made dcgirl get dressed with underwear, put on her shoes with socks, and we combed her hair. Of course she didn't like it but I did not give her a choice. I understand the whole "pick your battles" thing but doesn't socks and underwear seem like something that is a given, not a choice?

[KristinLynn]

I totally agree. That just sounds lazy to me...I can't believe she would send her daughter out for the day with no real clothes.

[wahmof3]

Oh my I have this exact same family!

I just started DCF a few weeks ago. Every morning (3x week) DCM bring the DCKS in and they are in their PJ's! DCM never asked me if this is ok, just did it. Top it off they don't have shoes, socks, or coats on and its freezing outside. DCM lets them walk up to my door!!!

My contract states: children are to arrive ready for the day. These DCKs are not and are FILTHY!!!! Their hair is not brushed, there is gunk all over their faces, etc. It breaks my heart.

I haven't said anything to DCM yet because I am debating on whether or not I will continue to care for them.

[Mom&Provider]

Yeah, I think you made the mistake by allowing her to send her daughter in pj's.

Now that it is clearly an issue for you (which you figured it wouldn't have been!?), I'd tell DCM that it's just too much since DCG clearly doesn't want to follow directions and get ready in your care, so she'll need to arrive to you dressed and ready. Just explain that it takes up too much time in the morning and while you were trying to help, you feel it's making matters worse now as other children are arriving etc.

[Blackcat31]

I think it is funny how so many providers require the DCK's to come dressed but yet, they themselves wear yoga pants and/or sweatpants for comfort and easy moveability.

Aren't PJ's the most comfortable thing a kid could wear? I guess I don't understand why they HAVE to wear something other than pajama's when they are just kids.

Plus, if you walk into any mall or store these days, more than half the population of people (including adults) are wearing pajama pants or yoga pants so I don't see how kids are suppose to be any different when adults don't seem to care any more.

I don't care what my DCK's wear for clothing provided it is clean, the right size and doesn't pose a safety risk to them or the other kids.

fwiw~ OP, I NOT saying you or any other poster in this thread wears only yoga pants or sweatpants .....I was just adding my 2 cents about the topic in general.

[crazydaycarelady]

I acutally don't mind getting her dressed but dcm does not bring clothes for her. It is dcms intention for her to stay in jammies, no underwear, and no socks for the whole day. Yesterday I used her spare outfit for clothes.

I think dcg needs to learn, from SOMEBODY at least, the you can't always hang out commando all day everyday just because you want to. LOL Sometimes life calls for underwear.

P.S. Blackcat - I AM wearing yoga pants! LOL

[daycare]

I agree that kids should get dressed for their day.

in my daycare we practice life skills. I also prepare them for kinder.

One of the things that we work on most is self help skills. When the kids start school, they will have to get up, eat, get dressed and be ready to go by a certain time. So this is something that I not only help the kids set up for, but the parents as well.

When DCK turn 4, they are given homework 3 nights a week and have to bring home a friday folder. I try to copy what the school does here, so that they are used to the routine and hoping to set them up for success.

I guess if I were dealing with younger age kids, then I may not care as much, but at 2.5 is when I start making them start practicing those life skills.

I would be telling DCM that she needs to send in clothes so that DCG can change.

BTW- Yoga pants are not PJ's.

[Blackcat31]

BTW- Yoga pants are not PJ's.

They are for me. I wouldn't be caught dead wearing yoga pants in public or anywhere I am conducting business.

NOT saying it is wrong, just sharing my personal feelings about them and saying the same respect should be given for DCF's personal feelings/thoughts about what their children should wear each day.

I understand that you practice life skills and self-help skills as do I but learning to put your shirt on or your pants is simple whether you are wearing PJ or jeans and a Tee.

Proper dress in public places if you go on field trips is one area I would feel uncomfortable but as a parent, I would be offended if you said my child couldn't participate in the trip to the zoo just because she was wearing pj's (as in pj pants and tops...not night gowns) especially if you told me that while you were wearing yoga pants.....kwim?

[daycare]

They are for me. I wouldn't be caught dead wearing yoga pants in public or anywhere I am conducting business.

NOT saying it is wrong, just sharing my personal feelings about them and saying the same respect should be given for DCF's personal feelings/thoughts about what their children should wear each day.

I understand that you practice life skills and self-help skills as do I but learning to put your shirt on or your pants is simple whether you are wearing PJ or jeans and a Tee.

Proper dress in public places if you go on field trips is one area I would feel uncomfortable but as a parent, I would be offended if you said my child couldn't participate in the trip to the zoo just because she was wearing pj's (as in pj pants and tops...not night gowns) especially if you told me that while you were wearing yoga pants.....kwim?

Sorry, I guess I was a little confused about the situation.

I would never tell anyone what to wear. I don't care if you wanted to wear a box for the day. As long as the child is comfortable, it is safe, clean and they can manage throughout the day, then I could not care what you wore.

All that I am saying is that they do need to change out of their sleeping clothes. I would not be ok with a child rolling out of bed and wanting to go out in the clothes they slept in. I guess to me that is gross.

[Willow]

I'd tell mom you tried and it's just not working out due to her attitude. Was a nice offer to extend, but if it's not working it's ok to wave the white flag and pass the responsibility back to the parents.






(Since capri pant season is over I am in yoga pants full swing.

Always paired with a respectable sweater or fleece pullover of course but I figure daytime pj wear is my given right as a daycare provider

The only line I won't cross is those nasty thin skin tight leggings that reveal EEEEEVERything or the lounge pants with cheesy/dorky patterns )

[Mommy2One]

I acutally don't mind getting her dressed but dcm does not bring clothes for her. It is dcms intention for her to stay in jammies, no underwear, and no socks for the whole day. Yesterday I used her spare outfit for clothes.

I think dcg needs to learn, from SOMEBODY at least, the you can't always hang out commando all day everyday just because you want to. LOL Sometimes life calls for underwear.

P.S. Blackcat - I AM wearing yoga pants! LOL

At first when you said no undies, I thought you mean she was in a Pull-up or something. She's seriously okay with her daughter going commando all the time?! And no socks is kind of yucky too.

[Blackcat31]

Sorry, I guess I was a little confused about the situation.

I would never tell anyone what to wear. I don't care if you wanted to wear a box for the day. As long as the child is comfortable, it is safe, clean and they can manage throughout the day, then I could not care what you wore.

All that I am saying is that they do need to change out of their sleeping clothes. I would not be ok with a child rolling out of bed and wanting to go out in the clothes they slept in. I guess to me that is gross.

Oh, I hear you (and I agree) but in today's world rolling out of bed IS ready and awake. ::::

I have seen young adults go to job interviews in their just slept in sleep clothes and messy hair, I see grown people everyday walking around the mall/stores in pj pants with all sorts of cartoon characters in them, young women in clothing that would have gotten me thrown out of school, church and my home, I see women in yoga pants all the time and I am betting only a tiny percentage of those actually just left a yoga class..... ::

Anyways, I guess my point was, that we all have different expectations of what is and isn't proper clothing and as long as a child is clean, I don't really care if they wear pj's (even fresh from sleeping) or anything else as long as it is safe and comfortable for them.

[dave4him]

My own kids get spoiled sometimes when im too lazy to get them dressed for the day... least the twins anyway

[LaLa1923]

They are for me. I wouldn't be caught dead wearing yoga pants in public or anywhere I am conducting business.

NOT saying it is wrong, just sharing my personal feelings about them and saying the same respect should be given for DCF's personal feelings/thoughts about what their children should wear each day.

I understand that you practice life skills and self-help skills as do I but learning to put your shirt on or your pants is simple whether you are wearing PJ or jeans and a Tee.

Proper dress in public places if you go on field trips is one area I would feel uncomfortable but as a parent, I would be offended if you said my child couldn't participate in the trip to the zoo just because she was wearing pj's (as in pj pants and tops...not night gowns) especially if you told me that while you were wearing yoga pants.....kwim?

Guilty as charged for wearing yoga pants!
What do you wear? As not to take over op i will post this topic.

[countrymom]

pj pants are a sign of lazy. I don't care if they are comfy they have yoga pants for that (and yes lululemon has nice ones, my dd owns 2 pairs) I don't know of any provider who is in pj pants (unless there is a reason) to do their job. Its the fact that mom is teaching her dd that its ok to be lazy and not care about her appearance.

also, if I go out with the littles I expect them to look presentable because they are representing my daycare.

my issue is that WHO THE HECK MADE SKINNY JEANS FOR A 2 YR OLD, REALLY THEY CAN'T BEND IN THEM.