The Straw...

[brookeroo]

So, I laid my chewer down today for his nap. I go to peek in on him and low and behold... he has struck again. This time within 5 minutes he managed to do this to my pack and play. Don't know why it surprised me since he did this to his own crib at home...



On top of it he pried off the speaker covers to my husband's gaming chair and chewed them up today as well. I emailed my husband and he came home for lunch because he knew I am stewing about this. He's trying to get me to keep them because we have our tenant moving out this weekend and therefore no income now for the rental house mortgage other than what I'm making through the daycare... and no calls or emails have been coming in for my ad replacement for the daycare in weeks. God only knows how long it will take to get someone in the rental house or my daycare...

I am so beyond frustrated right now. I never thought getting clients in this business would be this difficult!

I wrote up an invoice (which my husband was actually ok with ...thank god...) but I warned him when I give it to her not to be surprised if they pull him out. He said, "fine let them leave on their own terms but don't kick them out until we have a replacement. Just invoice them....if they choose to leave then that's fine"

There are just so many things I want to say to these parents...and I'm afraid of what will come out of the conversation after I hand her the invoice. I already can hear in my head half her responses....

[laundrymom]

Holy! Cow!!! Does he wait until you look away?
I would sit right beside him, and 'ahahahahah night night ' him if he stood up. Wow. That just sucks.

[JenNJ]

Can you put him on the floor in a superyard instead of a playpen? Can't really wreck that even by chewing. My dog chewed on his as a puppy and it still works.

[brookeroo]

Mmmm...he definitely knows it's wrong what he's doing. He does wait until I look away most of the time. I see him with something standing there watching me and when I look away I see him out of the corner of my eye stick what he had in his mouth. A lot of times as soon as I look at him he pulls it out of his mouth and turns around or runs away unless he become distracted by something else while he's chewing.

But some days he is just in a defiant mood and when I take something out of his hand and give him the toys I bought for him to chew on he will immediately throw it down and go get something else to chew on. He will look at me and see me looking at him and still stick it in his mouth. There are many of those days as well.

I am so torn. I was a banker for 10 years. My husband is a Central Underwriter for a small bank and I very much value my credit and try to make the wisest choices possible... I have a score over 900 so I am so afraid of the loss of income. I just am so frustrated with this situation the way that it is! I cannot seem to get these parents into reality...

[brookeroo]

Can you put him on the floor in a superyard instead of a playpen? Can't really wreck that even by chewing. My dog chewed on his as a puppy and it still works.

He also scratches at my berber carpet to try and eat lint. He does the same with my furniture as well...

Honestly after looking at the pnp and knowing how much damage he makes already to all the other hard plastic things in my house, as well as wooden furniture ect.. I fully believe that he could put teeth marks in my superyard as well. I'm going to invoice her for the pnp but I figured... he's already ruining it I might as well let him continue to ruin one thing rather than two if he's going to be here.

Second... he's always the last one asleep and he is a very light sleeper. Every little noise wakes him up. So if I have him downstairs with people coming and going or kids waking up because they've been asleep then he will not get his full nap. It doesn't matter when I lay him down. He takes about 1 1/2 hours to actually fall asleep. I can lay him down at 12 or 2 either way... he doesn't fall asleep right away. I've tried sitting in there with him and he will sit quietly but he plays...he doesn't fall asleep. I just feel like I'm getting no break at all with him as well. It's stress all day with no break from him.

[Crystal]

I know it is frustrating, but I have to ask, WHY do you leave him alone, giving him the opportunity to do this? You know he is going to do it, so don't leave him alone.

Also, at 21 months, I would not have him in a pack and play. He should lay down and nap on a mat with the other children. Then, he will be within sight and will not have a P&P to chew up.

[countrymom]

I know it is frustrating, but I have to ask, WHY do you leave him alone, giving him the opportunity to do this? You know he is going to do it, so don't leave him alone.

Also, at 21 months, I would not have him in a pack and play. He should lay down and nap on a mat with the other children. Then, he will be within sight and will not have a P&P to chew up.

because she needs a break too. And he has chewed up the mat so laying him down is also not an option (she has posted before on him) Also, at that age he shouldn't be doing it. Her sitting with him all day isn't going to solve the problem either (I'm not trying to chew you out, i'm just saying) I think he has some kind of disorder, what concerns me is that he's trying to eat lint and he's damaging furniture.

[brookeroo]

because she needs a break too. And he has chewed up the mat so laying him down is also not an option (she has posted before on him) Also, at that age he shouldn't be doing it. Her sitting with him all day isn't going to solve the problem either (I'm not trying to chew you out, i'm just saying) I think he has some kind of disorder, what concerns me is that he's trying to eat lint and he's damaging furniture.

THANK YOU Countrymom...

That response seems WAY more realistic...

[daycare]

I know it is frustrating, but I have to ask, WHY do you leave him alone, giving him the opportunity to do this? You know he is going to do it, so don't leave him alone.

Also, at 21 months, I would not have him in a pack and play. He should lay down and nap on a mat with the other children. Then, he will be within sight and will not have a P&P to chew up.

Crystal, I get what you are saying, but how can she do anything else if she cant leave him be in a pack in play?

When I have kids that I know will get into stuff, I put them in the pack in play so that I can ust the toilet or what not, because it is the safest place for them to be while out of my sight.

There are too many what ifs that could occur if she had to hover over this child all of the time.....

in group care I dont know of a way that we could supervise the children 100% of the time with only one provider.....or maybe I am just not that good???? IDK

[brookeroo]

I am not a person that has any training or degree in dealing with disorders nor did I ask for this. I'm not a specialist, a doctor or a therapist. I did not go into it knowing this. It's not my fault this family doesn't want to deal with it. I've done all that I can. I am not at fault for any of it.

It's just a bad set of circumstances that I'm in the spot I'm in. Otherwise I would have quit them long ago.... I have a marriage, two mortgages and two kids of my own to consider as well. Every choice that I make doesn't only affect me and this family... it affects my children and marriage too.

[Blackcat31]

Crystal, I get what you are saying, but how can she do anything else if she cant leave him be in a pack in play?

When I have kids that I know will get into stuff, I put them in the pack in play so that I can ust the toilet or what not, because it is the safest place for them to be while out of my sight.

There are too many what ifs that could occur if she had to hover over this child all of the time.....

in group care I dont know of a way that we could supervise the children 100% of the time with only one provider.....or maybe I am just not that good???? IDK

Yes, but this kid isn't doing something else...he is being distructive BEYOND the normal range of behavior for a kid his age.

Knowing he is that destructive means 100% constant supervision.

I would have to hire someone to help me care for him if he were here. I would probably have insisted the parents have him tested or I would have termed as I can't see how it is financially beneficial to have him in care if he destroys so many things.

And Yes, I believe a person CAN supervise the children in care 100% of the time and if a provider cannot, then she either needs to downsize the number of kids she has or hire help.

Also placing a child in a PNP to use the toilet is not enough time for this kid to do this. If I had him in care I would probably take him in the bathroom with me..... just to avoid such massive destruction. OP said he was napping, which I would have had him do right in my direct line of site.

OP~ sorry your PNP got destroyed. I would be billing the parents for it and I would absolutely be terming. If this child stays, he will end up costing you more than you earn from him.

[daycare]

I am not a person that has any training or degree in dealing with disorders nor did I ask for this. I'm not a specialist, a doctor or a therapist. I did not go into it knowing this. It's not my fault this family doesn't want to deal with it. I've done all that I can. I am not at fault for any of it.

It's just a bad set of circumstances that I'm in the spot I'm in. Otherwise I would have quit them long ago.... I have a marriage, two mortgages and two kids of my own to consider as well. Every choice that I make doesn't only affect me and this family... it affects my children and marriage too.

I feel for you.....and I don't blame you for the way that you feel. I bet this has got to be tough. Especially when things are difficult around you in other ways.

If I can help you to advertise your business better, please let me know. I can help you build a website, get on to google ads anything, please PM and let me know.....

We are all here to help you

[daycare]

Yes, but this kid isn't doing something else...he is being distructive BEYOND the normal range of behavior for a kid his age.

Knowing he is that destructive means 100% constant supervision.

I would have to hire someone to help me care for him if he were here. I would probably have insisted the parents have him tested or I would have termed as I can't see how it is financially beneficial to have him in care if he destroys so many things.

And Yes, I believe a person CAN supervise the children in care 100% of the time and if a provider cannot, then she either needs to downsize the number of kids she has or hire help.

Also placing a child in a PNP to use the toilet is not enough time for this kid to do this. If I had him in care I would probably take him in the bathroom with me..... just to avoid such massive destruction. OP said he was napping, which I would have had him do right in my direct line of site.

OP~ sorry your PNP got destroyed. I would be billing the parents for it and I would absolutely be terming. If this child stays, he will end up costing you more than you earn from him.

I just dont see how you could offer 100% supervision being the only provider and having other kids in care. Trust me, I try my hardest to do so, but it's next to impossible.

BUT I do agree with what you are saying. I do agree that this child needs to be 100% supervised, I just don't think he is in the right place to have that.

She is trying and I think that is all that really matters

[Country Kids]

I don't think as one person you are able to 100% supervise the whole time.

A. Going to the bathroom-I don't take everyone in with me. They are outside the door but not in eyesight.

B. Making a meal-Everyone is not in the kitchen with me. They are around the corner but not in direct site.

C. Helping a child in the bathroom-door open but once again not everyone is in direct site.

Those are just some of the times I can think that the kids aren't in 100% supervised site.

[daycare]

I don't think as one person you are able to 100% supervise the whole time.

A. Going to the bathroom-I don't take everyone in with me. They are outside the door but not in eyesight.

B. Making a meal-Everyone is not in the kitchen with me. They are around the corner but not in direct site.

C. Helping a child in the bathroom-door open but once again not everyone is in direct site.

Those are just some of the times I can think that the kids aren't in 100% supervised site.

what she said!!!

BTW I miss chat during out lunch breaks....booo