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Hi, newbie with a question. I have a dcg age 2 1/2...and ALL DAY she is either over-exaggerating things (like "X kicked me!" when she is the one who tripped over X) or flat out lying and yelling at me, "you SCRATCHED me!" while pointing to a tiny scar on her arm she got 3 months ago. She repeats things to her mother and yesterday she hit another dck for no reason, and the offender's mom came in with a negative tone this morning saying the other dck must have done something to provoke her DD...and that her DD told her "X head butted her" and "X broke her back"?!?! I'm worried dcg and her stories could really escalate into being accused of worse....am I being paranoid? How would you handle this with dcm? So far I just spelled out a whole day's worth of "lies" and incidents in her log book that goes home with her so she could get the picture of what is going on....on top of the making up stuff, she just doesn't listen despite going to time out what seems like all day sometimes. Any thoughts would be most appreciated, thanks!
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i have two right now that make up stories all the time. the 6 yr old boy who does it, his stories are more about things he has, like yesterday he told me he had a tree fort with a huge t.v. and WII in it. his 3 yr old sister, however, is more about making up stuff people do to her. whenever she goes in my sons room to play, she comes out crying that he pushed her or yelled at her. i know for a fact he isnt, so she has lost the privelege of playing in there. she now has to be where i can see her all the time. i have noticed with this family that they dont spend much time with their kids, so i think with both of them, it is just a cry for attention.
if i were you, i would shadow this girl for a while, or at least keep a close eye on her all the time. i would continue to point out that whatever she says happened, in fact did not, and that she can not make up stories like that. she is probably having a hard time knowing the difference between reality and fantasy. i would document every time she says something untrue, that way you will at least have a record of her story telling. that way if something does come up, you can show that she makes up stories often. as far as mom, i would just have a chat with her about it, so you are on the same page. show her the documentation, and try to reassure her that no one is hurting her child. -
My 4 year old DCB makes up stories too...such as when I am pushing him on the swing he says "you pushed my head"...and I was nowhere near his head....so I always worry that he will go back and say that to his mom and she'll wonder if I was mean to him or something. He's always making up stories.
The best advice I would say is to document it all..I know it can be hard to keep up with when they do it frequently, but we are told to document to protect ourselves. And make sure you tell the mom so she doesn't think otherwise.Comment
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Honestly, I would share your concerns with the parents. Just say something like although it is a normal developmental stage to come up with stories, you are working with him/her to understand the difference between truth and a story. Then give them some examples so that the parents know what is going on.Comment
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Thanks so much for your help! I've been documenting and gave her a bunch of examples yesterday (written) and as of now zero response/questions/discussions...nothing. This morning she called me to tell me she's taking her DD to her sister's for the day "because her DD just needs a break from daycare." The mom is not the talking type - she's an in & out, doesn't say goodbye person. She stopped by at lunch to drop off her check for next week (perfect opportunity to discuss our situation with her DD as all the kids were asleep), and she just handed me the check and left?!?! Wouldn't a mother want to discuss what's going on???Comment
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