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  • Two Moms Pregnant - Opening For Only One..

    I have no idea what to do - Who to terminate to make room !!
    I have two moms who are currently pregnant - due around the same time - I have an opening only for one of the kids..my next infant opening isnt until a year later...

    How do you decide ?? All the parents are great, the kids are great, all respectful, great hours -I have no idea what to do !!

    Anyone in this situation before? What did you do ?

  • #2
    Luckily, I have not had this come up yet, but have thought a lot about it just in case! If it happened to me, the choice on who to give the infant spot to would be very difficult, but I would not flat out terminate either one. I would go off of either who told me they were expecting first, or who had enrolled first, though I realize that may not help if one told you first, but the other one has been enrolled longer.

    Whichever family you decide you won't have room for, I would at least give them the option of keeping their older kid(s) in your program while waiting for a spot for the baby, even if it won't be for another year. They may be willing to make it work until you can have them both. And you just never know, you may have a spot open up sooner than you expect.

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    • #3
      And who knows, sometimes moms take off more time than planned. Don't terminate either one. When are they due?

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      • #4
        Seniority rules in my daycare.

        The spot would go to whoever was here the longest with the best track record. Be sure to tell the family that you can't take the baby at least 2 months prior to delivery and be ready for them to pull the other kid out.

        I have had this happen twice now.....

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        • #5
          Don't worry about it.

          I too had this come up a couple months ago. I have 1 leaving for school so I will have 1 infant opening and 1 DCM due March (going back in June) and another DCM (longest running client) due July.

          Turns out DCM due in July isn't going back to work and if she does, it's 2 days a month. (Which I won't do.) So it was nothing to worry about.

          Until one of them comes forward and asks for an interview, offers a deposit to hold the spot, etc, I wouldn't initiate any conversation with them.

          Too much could happen before now and then that could potentially cost you money. Keep things on the down-low until you know FOR SURE.

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          • #6
            One is Due in august and another is due in Oct. They both have told me they want to enroll their babies, yes I know things can change in a minute, change tomorrow, change 5 months from now, I don't plan to terminate anyone right now, and I will give whoever at least a 60-90 day notice. I am just trying to get a feel for what the best practice would be in this situation.

            All my families are a two child family ( or will be ) - I am OK financially if I lose anyone.

            I'm just curious - What "typically" rules ( in your world ) - seniority ? Money ? Hours ? Crap families ( obviously easy choice )

            Some of my older families who are no longer here would have been easy to make this decision but I'm actually in a spot now that I love all my families and all my kids - no one is better than the other.

            It's almost a flip of the coin and that's terrible - but when the time comes - IF - I have to make this decision it will be a hard one...which family do I get rid of. I simple have ONE opening - so I might keep both of these families and terminate an older family..I have no idea.

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            • #7
              Due in August and October?

              I guess my question is why are you worrying about this NOW?! There are so many factors that could change between now and then.

              Think about it...1 DCM isn't needing care until October and the other until December! Why worry about what's going to happen almost a year from now.

              Focus on what you have now and go with the flow. As time gets closer, maybe one of them wills strike up conversation about needing a spot, securing a deposit, signing a contract, etc.

              For now, let things be.

              There is no way I would give either any indication that you only have room for one baby. They could leave now and you could lose money.

              Don't talk about things until the time comes and you have to make a decision (if you even have to.)

              One of these moms could very well decide to drop down to part time or be a SAHM. Another might get laid off, a DCD lose their job, change jobs, etc. There are just way too many variables to get worried about this now.

              I would wait until July. If neither have talked to you by then, it's probably time to talk and decide.

              As for choosing one family over another. I think there are a lot of things to consider...which family you like the most, which kids you like the most, schedules, higher paying client (if there is one), if either are a habitual violator of your policies, etc.

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              • #8
                How many kids do you have now? You can have more than one infant depending on what the ages are of the other kids you have in care. also a variance would/could be a possibility if you hired an asistant due to the situation.

                I guess the biggest thing for me would be the hours, the track record of the family, the parenting style they have and basically what they are planning on doing after baby's birth.

                I have been in this same situation before and things just worked themselves out and only once did I offer up the spot to two moms and who ever wanted the spot had to pay for it to be held for them. One mom was not willing and the other was so she got the spot.

                There is a SEVERE shortage of spaces for infants in this area so..... I currently have 4 families with kids under 12 months on a wait list with no possibility of having room for any of them in the near future but all want to remain on the list...just in case something changes.

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by wdmmom View Post
                  Due in August and October?

                  I guess my question is why are you worrying about this NOW?! There are so many factors that could change between now and then.

                  Think about it...1 DCM isn't needing care until October and the other until December! Why worry about what's going to happen almost a year from now.

                  Focus on what you have now and go with the flow. As time gets closer, maybe one of them wills strike up conversation about needing a spot, securing a deposit, signing a contract, etc.

                  For now, let things be.

                  There is no way I would give either any indication that you only have room for one baby. They could leave now and you could lose money.

                  Don't talk about things until the time comes and you have to make a decision (if you even have to.)

                  One of these moms could very well decide to drop down to part time or be a SAHM. Another might get laid off, a DCD lose their job, change jobs, etc. There are just way too many variables to get worried about this now.

                  I would wait until July. If neither have talked to you by then, it's probably time to talk and decide.

                  As for choosing one family over another. I think there are a lot of things to consider...which family you like the most, which kids you like the most, schedules, higher paying client (if there is one), if either are a habitual violator of your policies, etc.
                  Yes due in August and October - I KNOW things can change by then - I could get hit by a car getting my mail tonight - I am not worrying about it - Two moms recently told me their are pregnant - wanting a spot with ME - I have not said anything I said " we will see as we get closer where I am at" And have left it at that. I am simply asking out of curiosity what other providers do when and if they have been in this situation.

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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by Blackcat31 View Post
                    How many kids do you have now? You can have more than one infant depending on what the ages are of the other kids you have in care. also a variance would/could be a possibility if you hired an asistant due to the situation.

                    I guess the biggest thing for me would be the hours, the track record of the family, the parenting style they have and basically what they are planning on doing after baby's birth.

                    I have been in this same situation before and things just worked themselves out and only once did I offer up the spot to two moms and who ever wanted the spot had to pay for it to be held for them. One mom was not willing and the other was so she got the spot.

                    There is a SEVERE shortage of spaces for infants in this area so..... I currently have 4 families with kids under 12 months on a wait list with no possibility of having room for any of them in the near future but all want to remain on the list...just in case something changes.
                    I have 10 kids now, I am licensed for 12. I believe our max variance is 30 days per year - I would need much more than that. With my current kids ages and what they will be then - I have one spot for one infant or any age. with the infant ratio I will be at I can only have 8 under school age - so I would definitely without a doubt ( if someone doesn't leave on their own etc etc etc etc ) have to let one family go.

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                    • #11
                      Is the variance rule saying that you can only have one for 30 days a county thing because I an also in MN and have had a variance for a lot longer than that before...several times as a matter of fact.

                      I am also licensed for 12-14 kids and currently have a variance (issued in December 2011) to have one more toddler than normal. The variance is in effect until May 30, 2012 so I am well beyond 30 days.

                      I have been given a variance before too letting me have 11 kids (I had 8 preschoolers, one toddler and 2 babies under 12 months) and I think my licensor issued me the variance because my preschool kids were all on the upper end of the age catagory. They were all 3.5 and older. I lost 5 of them to Kindergarten that fall.

                      I am going to look into the state rules for variances and see if there is anything in there about them being governed by individual counties. (unless you know that is how they do things)

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                      • #12
                        I think it's hit or miss with variances - my mother in law has gotten them before but not for very long and my licensor tells me constantly that the state/county is getting more and more tough on allowing them,..I guess I could when the time gets a little closer - ask again and see what answer I get this time

                        Wow with your variance being from Dec to May - I will definitely have to ask again ! What county are you in ?

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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by DanceMom View Post
                          I think it's hit or miss with variances - my mother in law has gotten them before but not for very long and my licensor tells me constantly that the state/county is getting more and more tough on allowing them,..I guess I could when the time gets a little closer - ask again and see what answer I get this time

                          Wow with your variance being from Dec to May - I will definitely have to ask again ! What county are you in ?


                          Yes, it couldn't hurt to ask anyways. I also think it depends alot on the ages of your current kids, your set up and how long you have been in the business.

                          FWIW~ from what I can tell about MN state rules it says we can have variances for things like that but says NOTHING about when, who and why variance requests are denied and/or granted so it must definitely be up to the individual licensor.
                          Last edited by Blackcat31; 02-28-2012, 08:40 AM.

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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by Blackcat31 View Post

                            Yes, it couldn't hurt to ask anyways. I also think it depends alot on the ages of your current kids, your set up and how long you have been in the business.

                            FWIW~ from what I can tell about MN state rules it says we can have variances for things like that but says NOTHING about when, who and why variance requests are denied and/or granted so it must definitely be up to the individual licensor.
                            I honestly think my licensor is a "lazy" and maybe doesn't want to do the leg work....as my mother in law who has been licensed for 30 yrs used to get them all the time but now with her new licensor ( which we have the same ) she never gets them anymore. You're right, it doesn't hurt to ask and I will down the road. Thanks
                            Last edited by Blackcat31; 02-28-2012, 08:40 AM.

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                            • #15
                              IMHO, if everything is the same between the 2 and nothing changes between now and July/August, I would say that you are going to have to go with the one that is born first. I would not hold a spot for a client for 3 months (baby born in October) when I could fill it sooner unless the lady who is due in October was willing to pay for 3 months missed wages.

                              Currently I have a DCF, mom is preggo, due in August, already has 3 months approved Maternity leave. My next infant spot opens up in April. I told her I financially cant leave it open until December. 7 months of missed wages is $5800. She totally understood.

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