Common Sense 101?

[KDC]

So, I have a HUGE area rug on my floor when you enter my house. However, when some families come into my home... they have NO problem walking on my carpet with dirty shoes on. They want to use my living room furniture to set their kid on to put on their shoes. Or siblings come running into my house with muddy shoes, and the parents say NOTHING :confused: I have made comments such as "Sweetie, I think you're shoes may be wet, can you please stay here and wait for your brother?" The parent passively says "stay here", but two minutes later the child is on my carpet. Ugh! I've put a chair in the hallway (yes, it looks stupid) -- however, it's not used by the child that needs the shoes, but the sibling who chooses to scratch the wood floor or climb on it.

I'm trying to stay nice, but my patience is wearing thin. I have a hard time correcting the children while their parents are here. What's appropriate to say? How do I address it with the parents who walk on my carpet? I need a backbone... any advice?

[cheerfuldom]

You just need a good schedule that means every kid is ready to go when their parents arrive. no parents or siblings coming in, period. make pickups as short as possible....hand out the kid and the bag and then thats that.

[Blackcat31]

How about a short, but to the point note? Have every parent read and sign off on it so you know they got the info...

"Dear Daycare Parents

Lately there has been an abundance of wet and/or muddly footprints left on my living room rug. I know this is where your child attend childcare but this is also my home.

I am asking that parents please use a bit more restraint and NOT step away from the entry way so that I can keep the dirt contained to one area.

If necessary, I will start implementing a rule where all shoes will need to remain outside on the steps if I cannot get everyone's support in this.

Thank you

Daycare Provider"

[KDC]

How about a short, but to the point note? Have every parent read and sign off on it so you know they got the info...

"Dear Daycare Parents

Lately there has been an abundance of wet and/or muddly footprints left on my living room rug. I know this is where your child attend childcare but this is also my home.

I am asking that parents please use a bit more restraint and NOT step away from the entry way so that I can keep the dirt contained to one area.

If necessary, I will start implementing a rule where all shoes will need to remain outside on the steps if I cannot get everyone's support in this.

Thank you

Daycare Provider"

Oooh... I like it! No pointing fingers, no uncomfortable conversations... this is good! I would love the have the kids ready for parents, but their pick-up window is all over the place.

[littlemissmuffet]

So, I have a HUGE area rug on my floor when you enter my house. However, when some families come into my home... they have NO problem walking on my carpet with dirty shoes on. They want to use my living room furniture to set their kid on to put on their shoes. Or siblings come running into my house with muddy shoes, and the parents say NOTHING :confused: I have made comments such as "Sweetie, I think you're shoes may be wet, can you please stay here and wait for your brother?" The parent passively says "stay here", but two minutes later the child is on my carpet. Ugh! I've put a chair in the hallway (yes, it looks stupid) -- however, it's not used by the child that needs the shoes, but the sibling who chooses to scratch the wood floor or climb on it.

I'm trying to stay nice, but my patience is wearing thin. I have a hard time correcting the children while their parents are here. What's appropriate to say? How do I address it with the parents who walk on my carpet? I need a backbone... any advice?

Oh honey, you're being WAY too nice. If anyone EVER steps passed the mats in the front entrance with their shoes on they get told "Excuse me, this is my HOME, please have some respect and remove your footwear"... it embarasses the hell out of everyone and they never ever do it again. I promise. I would do the same with your furniture being damaged and dirtied.

As for siblings of daycare kiddos coming passed the entrance, never going to happen - I would simply grab their hand and walk them right back to the front door and say "You need to stay with mom/dad".

Speak up. Stop letting people walk all over you and your things!

[littlemissmuffet]

Oooh... I like it! No pointing fingers, no uncomfortable conversations... this is good! I would love the have the kids ready for parents, but their pick-up window is all over the place.

I find the whole "no pointing fingers and no uncomfortable conversations" thing doesn't work. If someone is stupid and rude enough to walk in someone's home with their dirty shoes on, they are stupid and rude enough to think that rules do not apply to them.

TELL THEM RIGHT TO THEIR FACE WHEN THEY DO IT! Just like we do with the kids.

[momma2girls]

I have had to write it in my contract!! I also said it in a newsletter to everyone!!

[AmyLeigh]

Stick them with the carpet cleaning bill????
::::

[daycare]

I have a huge sign on my door that reads
STOP, large stop sign Please remove your shoes before entry.
No one has ever even walked in my home with shoes on...
I don't even allow anyone to wear them on my tile entry way. No shoes means no shoes.

Wearing shoes inside on carpet is disgusting. all of the bacteria and germs that are brought in. Their kids play on that carpet.... And a vacuum does not remove all of the dirt and germs......

[melskids]

OK....this is where our conversation on the other thread about backbone comes in.

Stop them at the door, put your hand up, Look right at them and say "Either please remove your shoes or DO NOT step on my carpet. Thank you"

It's awkward at first, but it gets easier each time you do it.

[saved4always]

I have a tiled foyer with a couple of rugs and trays I use for shoes and boots right at my door. My parents are very good about staying on the rugs or tile with shoes on. Once in the while, a child will escape into my dining room that adjoins the foyer before mom or dad gets his/her shoes off. I have not problem leading the child back to the door saying that "oops...can't be on that floor with shoes, sweetie. That one can't take any wetness or it will warp". I just give a friendly reminder that shoes need to be left at the door. If my parents were not good about the shoe thing, I would totally put a sign up and I would definitely not have a problem reminding more forcefully. Part of the reason I do child care is to make money to have my house nice and that floor was expensive (to me, anyways...!) so I would say something every day if I needed to.

[Blackcat31]

I find the whole "no pointing fingers and no uncomfortable conversations" thing doesn't work. If someone is stupid and rude enough to walk in someone's home with their dirty shoes on, they are stupid and rude enough to think that rules do not apply to them.

TELL THEM RIGHT TO THEIR FACE WHEN THEY DO IT! Just like we do with the kids.

I agree with you about the being nice and no fingers pointing thing not always working but it DOES and CAN work for some people. I, myself, would personally be super blunt. I sometimes talk to my dcp's s if they are one of my daycare kids. I have no problem doing that. But that is just me (and two decades of working with families under my belt).

However, OP's initial post said she has tried being nice and she is losing her patience which to me says two things; 1) she hasn't developed a super strong, up-front backbone yet and 2) she is really a nice person and is probably uncomfortable with confrontation. That was why I thought a quick note or letter that isn't confrontational or finger pointing would be the first step to solving her problem...and building that backbone.

I do think speaking up is helpful but really if it isn't necessay then why go there? If the short note works, why not use that first?

Not everyone who walks off the rug is rude and stupid. Sometimes, people just aren't thinking. Or they think that when you offer up your home for mulitple families to come and go, that there will be mud and dirt tracked in and you expect it as part of the job So it could just be that parents aren't really thinking or have their minds on other things. I don't think it is just that expect to not have to follow the rules. I think they just aren't realizing what a big deal it is.

I am not disagreeing with you, just stating why I suggested the letter. It takes time to culitvate a backbone. I think it is a process for some people and needs to be done in steps. If you come out fighting mad, you kind of look a bit harsh so I too, try the soft method first before I say anything bluntly.

[Countrygal]

I find the whole "no pointing fingers and no uncomfortable conversations" thing doesn't work. If someone is stupid and rude enough to walk in someone's home with their dirty shoes on, they are stupid and rude enough to think that rules do not apply to them.

TELL THEM RIGHT TO THEIR FACE WHEN THEY DO IT! Just like we do with the kids.

Sometimes I sure wish I was more like you!!!!::::

[Heidi]

How about a short, but to the point note? Have every parent read and sign off on it so you know they got the info...

"Dear Daycare Parents

Lately there has been an abundance of wet and/or muddly footprints left on my living room rug. I know this is where your child attend childcare but this is also my home.

I am asking that parents please use a bit more restraint and NOT step away from the entry way so that I can keep the dirt contained to one area.

If necessary, I will start implementing a rule where all shoes will need to remain outside on the steps if I cannot get everyone's support in this.

Thank you

Daycare Provider"

bingo!

[cheerfuldom]

If I had to let people in on a regular basis, I would have seating right by the door so they come in out of the weather and then wait there. Siblings MUST wait there too, period. But I am also totally okay with speaking up. I rarely write little notes and such that some of your do.....its faster and easier to just tell people to stop being annoying (in a nice way, ha ha). Whats wrong with saying "Hey mom, please wait right there and I will bring junior to you. I dont allow muddy shoes in the house. Thanks for understanding"