She's Not Learning?!? Vent

[dave4him]

So I hear from my Mil that my sil wants to take her d out of my care claiming she's not learning anything... At her other care center they were doing numbers and letters colors by now..... Um she's one! She turns two in two weeks but the kids not brilliant really! She's the reason I started my daycare in the first place so the amount of ingratitude makes me sick! I am doing the best I can but apparently not enough

[dave4him]

Not to mention I've only been doing this for three weeks!

[dave4him]

hoping for little encourgament

[KEG123]

poke her in the eye!

[sharlan]

I'm sorry, but you're not going to get the encouragement you are looking for from me.

Your in-laws are not your #1 fans. No matter what you try to do, it just doesn't seem good enough for them. You've been married long enough to know that isn't going to change. Entering into a business arrangement with them is not a good idea.

I realize that your family needs the income, but is it really worth it? You have two choices - #1 suck it up and deal with the constant put downs or #2 tell your sil that this isn't going to work out and suffer the consequences.

Your wife is miserable and you're going to be miserable caring for this child. Two miserable parents do not make a happy family.

[familyschoolcare]

I do not htink God intended for two years old to learn much "academically. "

Two years old are very full of energy and curiosity.

You should not fell bad because your niece acts the way children her age are supposed to.

As for the "At her other care center they were doing numbers and letters colors by now." I worked at a center like that and the learning of numbers and letters in the two years old class was all for show. The children learned very little.

example: for circle time they had a shapes chart and the teacher had a nice little song the children memorized about each shape. They would sing the song the teacher would point to the shape as they sung the song. In a few weeks when parents picked up the children where able to point to the shapes and name them. The children could only do this in the order the shapes "appeared" in the song. When you randomly pointed to a shape and asked them what it's naem was they did not know.

I (someone with a degree in elementary education) does not condiser this learning. Some professionals say this is early leaning and makes it easeir for the children to learn the sahpes names when they are ready. I think that this kind of "playfull" learning, can not hurt. Provided that it is in balance with actualy playing time.

With all that said maybe you could try to find out what kind of learning your family wants for the little one.

[Blackcat31]

I think you should take this opportunity to talk with your SIL (as a parent of your DC child not as your SIL) and discuss with her what her expectations are in regard to her daughter. Gather some developmental information for the child's age group and talk openly with her mother about what she should and shouldn't be doing at this age.

Work together to set some goals and work toward accomplishing those goals. Give the mother some ideas and activities that she can do at home with her daughter. Don't allow a parent to make you the primary person responsible for educating their child. It is the parents responsibility to educate their child at this age and stage of her life.

At this age, she shold be learning social skills, self-help skills and just about herself in general. Academic come later and really shouldn't be part of her daily learning curriculum while in family child care and at 1 or 2 years of age.

Hang in there....we've all been there!

[dave4him]

Well I love my niece which the whole point so I'll put up with all I have too. As far as teaching her I do make the most of the day and she gets a lot more attention when she's around me not to mention the positive male role influence. Perhaps this is just Gods way of saying I need to push more.....

[AmyLeigh]

But she is learning...

....learning that early childhood is fun and not all about academics!

Ever hear of Raymond Moore? He wrote the book Better Late Than Early. It shows evidence that academics should be held off until a child is about 8 or 9, when they are emotionally as well as intellectually ready for it.

[dave4him]

She is learning, plenty of social skills if nothing else. Course what my sil doesnt realize is right now the only thing holding me in Oklahoma is taking care of my little niece and my 12 year old niece too. Love my family Just have to discuss with my 17 year old sister in law whats normal for her almost two year old daugther to have understanding of now and what we will be working on.

[littlemissmuffet]

She is learning, plenty of social skills if nothing else. Course what my sil doesnt realize is right now the only thing holding me in Oklahoma is taking care of my little niece and my 12 year old niece too. Love my family Just have to discuss with my 17 year old sister in law whats normal for her almost two year old daugther to have understanding of now and what we will be working on.

Your SIL is 17? LOL, well that explains it. I know that's age discrimination, but quite honestly, I don't care... because seriously, what does she know???

[momofboys]

Sorry - I don't have much advice but do you maybe have an informational sheet you can give them each day to let them know what you do work on? That way you can let them know what things you worked on each day.

[Meeko]

Dave,

Many parents feel unless their child is coming home with work sheets each day and reciting this, that and the other....that they are not learning.

I give every parent who enrolls with me a copy of this brochure. It helps them understand how children REALLY learn.

http://www.naeyc.org/store/node/29

[Hunni Bee]

Dave,

Many parents feel unless their child is coming home with work sheets each day and reciting this, that and the other....that they are not learning.

I give every parent who enrolls with me a copy of this brochure. It helps them understand how children REALLY learn.


http://www.naeyc.org/store/node/29

I deal with this on a daily basis, not from the parents (who I honestly think, don't care what I "teach" all day, as long as their kid comes home with all body parts attached and leaves happily in the morning), but from my director!!

I send home a weekly report of what we did, the art projects and the Weekly Reader for that week...but basically, WE PLAY

[wdmmom]

I think there is a common misconception that parents seem to think it is OUR responsibility as providers to educate their children. While I firmly believe that children should be raised and taught by their parents. I don't offer a preschool program for the simple reason that I tried it and it was a joke. While I have no problem singing the ABC's and doing flashcards and doing shapes & colors, I don't have any expectation that they will walk away learning or remembering it.

Parents need to realize that we as providers are NOT teachers and if you do not offer a preschool program, they are paying for childcare services, not schooling.