Tweet
A few of my dck bring a little toy from home, usually it's one or 2 little trucks and cars, I'm fine with this as long as they share, they know the rules. However I have a dcb that is 5 he has been with me since he was 2, he has brought very big things and boxes of things, I told the parents that it needs to be kept small I can no longer allow him to bring these big things anymore. Today I see his mom holding a huge box, and the boy is carring a case, great, she comes in and he grabs it from her and says I'm sorry I know you don't like him bringing things like this but i couldn't get him out of the house, I said I'm sorry but mom is going to have to take it home with her, he started arguing and whining and mom says see I told you, I'll take it home, he continues with the whining and I explained again that he can bring small things but the big things need to be kept at home, I said it wouldn't be fair to the others that have brought things and they couldn't keep them here either. His mom then says when I pick you up I'll take you to the store to buy that toy you wanted. I'm standing there thinking what the heck, he's arguing and whining about something you know the rules about and you tell him you'll buy him a toy??? Talk about encouraging his behaviour. Last week another dad brought a huge bucket of legos, I said sorry but those will need to go back home with you, he said I know, I told him that but he argued with me so I said fine you can tell him. I don't get it, why do parents do this, if they know the rules and the kids do as well why can't they flat out tell them no we aren't taking them, why do they make me do it and be the bad guy, isn't this teaching kids that its ok to try and break rules? I just don't get it..thanks for letting me get that off my chest
-
-
WOW!!! SOme parents just don't get it, or should I say alot of parents out there, just do not get it!!!!!Originally posted by tenderhearts View Post -
Ugh! I so hear you on that one. That has got to be one of the worst parts of this job. Working with these kids day in and day out on behavior, right and wrong, respecting others, etc and then having to witness kids being allowed to walk all over their parents... or even worse being out right rewarded for it. With the crazy amount of parents like these out there nowadays I really fear for the future.
Comment
-
I really feel the same. These parents now a days have very little repect for others, property, rules, etc... it is definately not how it used to be at all!!Originally posted by Daycare Mommy View PostUgh! I so hear you on that one. That has got to be one of the worst parts of this job. Working with these kids day in and day out on behavior, right and wrong, respecting others, etc and then having to witness kids being allowed to walk all over their parents... or even worse being out right rewarded for it. With the crazy amount of parents like these out there nowadays I really fear for the future.Comment
-
I don't think it's about respect or rules. It's about the child is running the show!!
Once at the center I was working at a little boy come in holding a VCR tape. His mom said "Sorry I couldn't get it from him" and she left. I walked over to him and put my hand out and he put it right in it!
It's about: Who is the real boss of the house!Comment
-
-
I don't allow the kids to bring anything from home UNLESS i am having a show and tell day and then the stuff goes up untill we are ready to share..but i agree alot of it has to do with parents these days letting their children guide how things go..Comment
-
Why don't you tell the parent to STOP? Embarass them if you have to. It's simple...."My policy is that I do not allow toys to be brought from home. I expect my families to respect that policy. Do not allow your child to bring his toys to daycare again."
Simple. I am so glad I don't have families like this. I HAVE, but I learned a long time ago that if you don't speak up for yourself, your going to get fed up and burnt out with dealing drama. I simply refuse to allow parents to think they are going to dictate how I run my program.Comment
-
Been there, done that! :Originally posted by Persephone View Post
:
I had a boy who was 3 years old and he "just couldn't leave the house without a car" BULL. Fridays were toy day. Well it was Friday everyday for this boy. His parents knew the rules. Heck, HE knew the rules. Yet everyday he kept on bringing in his car.
I would wait until the parents left and I would take the toy and either put it on my desk or on the directors desk in the office. Then it got to a point where it's like hey I am not waiting anymore. So I would take the car right in front of the mother and hand it back to her. Of course the boy screamed and cried. Mom would look at me and I am sure calling me every name in the book haha. But hey everyone else follows the rules so can he.
Then before I left the center, I trained him to where if he saw me right away he would give the car to the parents.
Comment
-
At pick up time, give the parent a sweet little notecard that says "Thank you so much for the toy donation! the children really will enjoy playing with it." Thank her child, too. That might work...Comment
-
crystal, I DID speak up for myself, I told her to take the toy home that he could not leave it here and she did, it's just what she did that I don't agree with if you read the post, I do allow the kids to bring a small toy, it doesn't bother me, the kids and parents know the rules but I don't allow big toys or buckets of things.Comment
-
I DID read your post, I know what you said, but the parent continues to disrespect that policy. She has been told 1 SMALL toy and she continues to bring alot instead. I just wonder why, as the provider, in your own home, you would allow it to continue. It's your program, tell her to quit disrespecting you.
Parents like this one are the ones that end up making the rules get changed for everyone, and I would just make a no toy policy, period. But, that's just me...!
Last edited by Michael; 03-10-2010, 06:53 PM.Comment
-
We had a 3 yr old dcg who always brought small toys from home. It became a problem, though, because when the girl's dad would pick her up, she'd say she had to get her toys. Then she wouldn't be able to find them, and the dad would stand there and ask us if we knew where her toys could be. We have enough to do and keep up with (sippy cups, pacifiers, etc) without worrying about keeping track of all the girl's Beanie Babies throughout the day! But he would just stand there and wait on us while we looked around for her toys! After it became a problem with sharing issues, and the children getting into a fight (yes, an actual fight, with the 3 yr old ontop of another dcg who had gotten her toy to play with) And the same day I was trying to put this dcg into time out for something and she took her stuffed animal puppet and hit me with it! So I let her parents know that she was no longer allowed to bring toys from home. And when we made up the new policy, THAT was in there. No toys from home except for show and tell days (and they'll be put up until time). Of course her parents would do what your's did and say they couldn't get the toy(s) away from her (and yet all I had to do was hold out my hand, and she'd hand it over). It really took the nerve the day I let her mom know we were doing a show and tell day and she could bring ONE toy from home. The dcm said right in front of her daughter, "Oh yeah, like she'll only bring ONE toy". No wonder it's so hard to discipline children at daycare, when the parents practically give the children permission to act like they do!Comment
-
-
notecard idea
Persephone,
I just figured that if a parent can't grasp that the rules are there for the child's good, then why not make the situation benefit everyone.
Also, only one of 2 things can happen:
1) She gets the hint.
OR
2) She has the guts to say something like "Oh no, we weren't donating that- it's his favorite toy!" In which case the issue is in the open to discuss. That's when I would say "This seems like something that might cause a problem- I think it would be best to leave the toys at home from now on. Thank you for bringing this issue to my attention."
Always let them think it was their idea.Comment
Comment