Potty Training Issues with Two Different DCB

[Alwaysgreener]

New family (B), DCB is 3.5, and potty training. I was under the impression that he was farther along.

So dcm asked if I send him to the bathroom, I said yes about every two hours during diaper changes. That he is always wet, really wet, and when I ask him if he is wet, he says no. Basically, he does not hold it but can do everything else by himself, even snap his jeans.

She says she sends him every 30 minutes. There is no way, I could do that with my own child when I was potty training her.

So this is the issue, when I send him to the bathroom, he goes in happily, sits down on the toilet then calls me and says, "I am done". I come back and he is just sitting there. Did you pee? NO

Basically...

Go potty
Sit down, I'm done
Put on the new pull-up
I'm done
Put on your pants
I'm done
Flush the toilet
I'm done
Wash your hands

He will not move on to the next step without me coming back to check on him. Help, I tried telling him the steps ahead of time and had him repeat them back to me but still, I'm done, after every step. How do I break this habit of needing someone every step of the way?









Family (A) DCB is 3.10 he holds himself all day and does not go to the bathroom on his own. He holds himself all day. At first, I did not realize that he did not go on his own because I send them before we go outside, before and after naptime. Then this week, we did not go out because of bad weather, he held himself all day until he peed himself. DCM then tells me that if he had not gone in a couple of hours, she sends him to go. ugh. So he does not really go on his own.

The day that he wet himself, I asked him what was wrong but since he will not talk to me, so I was unable to figure out what was wrong until he peed.

Now, I am paying attention to when he goes or does not go and started chanting, when we gotta go potty we go right away.

Today he did the same thing and held it for a while but he went on his own, and when he did he peed a lot. (I think that he arrives with a fullish bladder, so I may try to send him right away and see if that helps)

But here is the weird thing when he poops, he does it standing up, backed up to the toilet with the toilet seat up. I told dcm, and she seemed shocked that he would do that and said that he uses a potty ring at home. I told her that the seat had one built-in. (there is a stool right next to the toilet, too) I even showed him how to use the toilet seat and he does this. (great problem solving)

However he does not talk to me, he just stands there when he is done because he does not know how to wipe. Plus I have to clean my toilet every time he does this. (for the most part, he gets it in the bowl but not into the water part)

Thoughts on what to try?

[Michael]

Try the Sink The Cheerios trick. Put 5 Cheerios in the toilet and tell him to sink them.

[sahm1225]

For the first DCB - can you make a visual chart for him? He’s 3.5, show him the chart and have him read it to you: then laminate it and post it in the bathroom. When he yells ‘I’m done’ I’d reply with follow the next step:

as far as popping standing up, I’d have him sit down and explain we sit to poop. Do his parents wipe him at home? They need to start teaching him to wipe.

[Alwaysgreener]

I have been working with the 1st dcb on what to do with a chart. I have not posted it in the bathroom yet. Today he said done and then I said did you change your pull-up? When I went to check he was changing his pull-up. So I feel like I am winning.

[Alwaysgreener]

For the first DCB - can you make a visual chart for him? He’s 3.5, show him the chart and have him read it to you: then laminate it and post it in the bathroom. When he yells ‘I’m done’ I’d reply with follow the next step:

as far as popping standing up, I’d have him sit down and explain we sit to poop. Do his parents wipe him at home? They need to start teaching him to wipe.

the other dcb poops maybe once a week. I talked to him after the first time about sitting down to poop but he still stood up the next time. So far he has only pooped twice here, both times were right after nap time. Yes, I have a feeling that dcm does a lot for both of the kids, including wiping his bottom.

What happens is that I wake him from his nap and then send him to the bathroom, I then put away his mat and change another child's diaper, when I turn to check on him, he is just standing there back up to the toilet and not saying a thing. I go into the bathroom to see what is wrong and he has pooped. I then tried to find out if there was something wrong and he just stood there. I have to tell him to answer by nodding or shaking his head. Then I asked if he needed help and if he needed me to wipe him. He will nod and turn to let me wipe. I have tried to tell him to wipe and offered the TP to him, but he just stood there not moving.

I have not been able to know ahead of time that he needs to poop.

He also does not go potty unless I tell him to go, so I have been telling him within the first 30 minutes of arriving to go. That has seemed to help with his mood for the morning at least. I thought needing to go was the reason he sat at the table for an hour one morning but he did it today too after pm snack. He just sat there and would not get up even after he was told to get up. He has no interest in getting up, not sure why.

[Alwaysgreener]

VENT STORY TIME

So yesterday Family A dcb did it again. He was holding himself while I was feeding the baby, and I had forgotten to tell him to go when he arrived. (I have been having him go upon arrival, nap, and departure time so he does not wet himself) I asked my dd to take him and walk him to the bathroom. She did but he did not go in, even though I told him to go to the bathroom, he just kept pacing in front of the door.

Then I sent DS to walk him into the bathroom, he did and dcb started to go. but he did not sit down, he lifted the seat again and back up to the toilet. DD went in and told him to sit down and she put the seat back down and put him on it. At this point, I think that he had finished and just sat on the toilet. DD had told me that he had diarrheal

I check on him and ask if he needs help, and do you need to be wiped. He does not answer me. I started changing the younger ones, repeatedly asking the question. He nods yes after a while but then will not stand up, I have to help him up. I wipe him, he will not turn his body to make it easier. When I am done, I tell him to pull up his pants and wash his hands, then proceed to leave the room.

DCG tells me she has to go and you know how that works as long as she can not she has to go more. I have her sit down to wait and tell him that she has to go.

He just stands on the stool and stares. I ask him questions and nothing. I figure out that there is something wrong with his pants. When he backed up to the toilet to poop he peed on his pants and my rug. They are jeans and he can not get them off, honestly, he is not putting in much effort into it, either.

I get his pants off and give him fresh clothes, I tell him to get dressed, to get his underwear on first, then when he is done to wash his hands. I turn to change another child, when I look back he is dressed and pacing in front of the sink. I remind him that his friend is waiting to go and I need him to wash his hands.

When I told DCM that he did it again and what happened, including him peeing on my rug. She asks if I have shown him how to use our toilet and built-in potty ring.

Yes, I have that the other kids use the potty ring and it was already for him but do not forget that he is lifting the toilet seat up when he backs up to the toilet to poop, instead of getting on. Plus there is a stool to the side of the toilet for him to use to get on the toilet if he needs to. He is almost 4 and a smart child, he is fully capable of sitting on the potty ring himself and I should not have to instruct him through the whole routine.

I then pointed out to her that he has only pooped 3 times at my home and every time it has been diarrhea. It hit me later that the only time her poops here is when he can not hold it in. DCM blamed his diarrhea on the milk that she provides, which he drinks daily here, 2x a day but only has diarrhea every once in a while when he is here and never at home. That must be it, or it is the cottage cheese I served him a month ago or the cream cheese that I have in the fridge that I have never served him, he can not be getting sick because the ear infection that his sister has is not contagious even though he is coughing and sniffing which was her symptoms before she was diagnosed.

[Alwaysgreener]

We watched GO Potty GO today and he went to the bathroom (pee) by himself without me telling him to go. Of course, I had to tell him to flush and wash his hands afterward.