Need Advice on Terming a Child With Special Needs

[Unregistered]

I agreed to enroll a 1.5 year old little girl with Down Syndrome back in August. The family is lovely, and I adore the little girl. I have a larger in home program, with ages 3 months-4 years and transport. DCG plays very well with the other children and really fits right in. The problem I am having is that I did not realize her PT/OTs would be coming here weekly to work with her for about an hour at a time. I don't mind the special exercises I have to do with her, as we just make it into a game...or sing and "dance" so the other children can do them too. It's just that I have to schedule and participate in these appointments during daycare hours so they may observe her. I feel heartless for wanting to even term them, but being the only provider, it's just been chaotic when the PT/OTs are here because the other children get wild trying to show off knowing they don't have my full attention. As much as I would love to help them, I think my program isn't the best fit for them Also, in the next 6-12 months, I won't be able to offer all the resources she needs without making some big changes to my daycare space. I think a daycare center would be best since it wouldn't be as big of a deal to fit these appointments in. I'm just not sure how to suggest otherwise as to not offend them?

[Annalee]

I agreed to enroll a 1.5 year old little girl with Down Syndrome back in August. The family is lovely, and I adore the little girl. I have a larger in home program, with ages 3 months-4 years and transport. DCG plays very well with the other children and really fits right in. The problem I am having is that I did not realize her PT/OTs would be coming here weekly to work with her for about an hour at a time. I don't mind the special exercises I have to do with her, as we just make it into a game...or sing and "dance" so the other children can do them too. It's just that I have to schedule and participate in these appointments during daycare hours so they may observe her. I feel heartless for wanting to even term them, but being the only provider, it's just been chaotic when the PT/OTs are here because the other children get wild trying to show off knowing they don't have my full attention. As much as I would love to help them, I think my program isn't the best fit for them Also, in the next 6-12 months, I won't be able to offer all the resources she needs without making some big changes to my daycare space. I think a daycare center would be best since it wouldn't be as big of a deal to fit these appointments in. I'm just not sure how to suggest otherwise as to not offend them?

I had this problem a few years back with an autistic child...After talking with licensing (this is a tricky situation with the state), we decided the best thing to tell the parents is that I would be allowed to pick the time for ot/pt which was at 7 AM so my daily schedule would not be disrupted after everyone arrived...then the parents asked if they could go to another room in the house and choose a different time, to which licensing said "NO".....so the child stayed with me but they got ot/pt elsewhere. I did not mind helping as I offered many onsite observation during testing, but the ot/pt would want to come at lunch/nap and nothing was consistent. I can't work like that for the sake of ALL my children. Good luck to you!

[BrooklynM]

If I were you I would contact my licensing agent to see what they recommend. Sometimes it may be against the rules to have someone come in if they are not licensed to be in your home with the other kids. You could use that as an excuse.

I would also maybe have as discussion with their doctor as to what will be required and let them know that you want to be able to accommodate the child but you aren't sure if you will be the best care for their child. Let them know your concerns in a loving way. It does sound like this could impact the rest of your group quite a bit, but you really want to make sure that you tread lightly. I've worked with a lot of special needs children in the past and it is so hard for the parents, especially at a young age like this. You don't want the parents to look back on this and think that their child isn't wanted, so you have to come from a loving place, which it definitely sounds like you are. I would approach this as "building a plan" with them and see if you can all come up with a plan going forward. If they have the means, they may want to pay for a part time assistant to help out.

I would just tread very lightly and with as much compassion as you can. :hug:

[Leigh]

If the therapy is the only issue, why not just stop doing the therapy in your home and keep the family? If the therapy is just part of a bigger issue, then I'd go ahead with a term. You can not be expected to do what is the job of a parent with this therapy. If it's a service you can offer, great, if not-let the parents do it themselves.

[cheerfuldom]

I would just be honest and say that you love their child and working with the family but have found the therapy sessions to be more than your group can handle. Is there a way for them to have the sessions at home? If not, you feel sad to let them go but will have to ask that they find a program better suited to accommodate the therapy sessions. This isn't terming. This is just being honest in saying that you bit off more than you can chew and you dont want any of the kids in care to have chaotic days or a distracted provider due to the therapy sessions. It would be unfair to not provide the same level of care to each child. I am guessing the parents will find some way to work it out. It is a very common issue with home daycares