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Adjusting period

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  • Adjusting period

    I have never really had a child have a hard time adjusting to starting daycare. I have recently taken a new dcc who is 3. He has never been in dc before. DCM is recently divorced and had to go back to work after being a SAHM.
    I expected a few days of difficulty with him, and I know he's adjusting to a lot of new things.
    We are going on our 3rd week now, and he cries all day for his mom. I have tried everything from having him make his mom cards and pictures, to keeping him busy with play, and also just letting him have his sad moments. I have tried to be empathetic with him.
    As soon as I have to tend to another DCC, he has a major melt down and I'm becoming exhausted.

    Do any of you fine people have any tips to help me and this little guy adjust?

  • #2
    The longest I had a kid behave like that was 3 months. It was a long 3 months. She was 2, only cam 3 days a week but missed a lot so it took forever for her to adjust. It sounds like you are doing everything you can. Is this child fulltime? Some children are just sensitive. When I worked at a center we had a 2 1/2 yo who never stopped crying at naptime. He was happy the rest of the day and would just weep during nap. It was heart breaking and a year later he would still cry.

    haha sorry not very helpful. Just wanted to assure you it happens to everyone :hug:


    • #3
      My go to for this is a "Crying Chair".
      If a little cuddling and empathy doesn't settle the child down, then they are offered the choice to go sit in the crying spot. Choose a place far enough away from where all the fun play is happening that the crying doesn't bother the other munchkins, BUT close enough that the new DCB can see the fun he is missing.

      Make sure that this is not seen as a punishment and that the little boy knows he has complete control over leaving. When he is done crying, he can go play toys.

      I had a little boy just like yours. First DC after being SAH for 2 1/2 years. Each day, his time in the crying chair got shorter and shorter. Now if plays along with everyone and is my happiest munchkin!


      • #4
        I also have a crying rug and same concept as PP and it worked for me as well. I give them a couple of weeks and then it's time to face it and move on to having fun


        • #5
          I did a crying chair, too, with a child who had a very difficult transition (2.5) for 7-8 weeks. It was A LOT of crying and it was all very "screamy" sounding. I nearly termed.

          Every single time the crying would stop I would excitedly go get the child and say woohoo play time!!! If it started back up again, back to resting in a nice chair and reading a book. Any cuddling and such made it ten times worse so I would only give a quick hug in the morning upon entry and say I was really glad to see her and then move right along with the day as normal.


          • #6
            I have had a couple of kids like this. The worst one finally stopped crying after several months but she never did warm up to the daycare environment. Some kids just really never adjust fully so its up to you how much longer you can take this. If you haven't seen any progress at all, I would think this little guy will take 3 to 6 months if he comes around at all, its up to you if you can handle that.