No announcement yet.

How Would You Handle This One?

  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • How Would You Handle This One?

    My 4yo dcb was saying today that he didn't get a very good night's sleep last night because all he could hear was his mommy screaming ... A couple days ago he was talking about how his mommy's friend spent the night and he didn't know anyone was there until he found the guy's pants on the floor when he went to his mom's room. This child and his mother live with the mother's parents, and the parents are away on vacation right now so I'm sure you can imagine exactly what this child is hearing .... Is this something you mention to the parents or just pretend you didn't hear anything at all?

  • #2
    I think I would mention it. It is a touchy subject though.
    I'd say exactly what the child said, and say something like "I thought you should know, maybe he's having bad dreams or something?"

    have fun with this one, !


    • #3
      I'd exercise caution any time you tell a parent what the child said at daycare. I've had children "never talk to me again" practically. And then months later they tell me they got into trouble for telling me something.

      You could ask the mom how she was doing. Establish a relationship with her so that you can be a resource if she needs one.

      Especially do that for the child. It's possible you could be the only bright spot in this child's life right now. Assure him he is safe with you, he can talk about anything that he wants to, and he can take a short nap anytime he wants.

      How sad for the child.


      • #4
        Yes. It's going to be awkward, but I'd say something for her child's sake. She needs to be more discreet!


        • #5
          I would say something...Unfortunately, I've had this happen at my daycare before too. Except it was a relative. NOT COOL. Anyway, this little girl told me that _____ (Mom's friend who came over ONE night...) was jumping on the bed, and she tried to go tell him to stop but the door was locked. UH, THANK GOODNESS IT WAS. I just can't imagine not thinking about your kids when you do something like that.
          It's hard to say something, but like someone said before, have fun with it.


          • #6
            Oh dear...I would have a hard time bringing that up to a parent that I didn't know very well.

            Maybe you could go suttle and say he said he was tired because he heard noises in the night and maybe that will be enough for her to catch on and be embarrassed enough to be more careful next time ::


            • #7
              Personally, I wouldn't say anything. I think that it would be overstepping my bounds. It's embarrassing and awkward. If the mom is screaming THAT loud, she probably isn't too conderned to begin with.

              Unless abuse or neglect is involved - what our families do behind closed doors in their own homes is none of our business. Plus, by the time you have this conversation with the mom, the parents will probably be back from vacation! ::


              • #8
                I have to, respectfully, disagree Marisol. When a child reports to you that they are having "problems", as a Child Care Custodian it is your responsibility to ensure a child's overall well-being. This is effecting his sleep and therefore, his entire day - especially if he is reporting it to his childcare provider. It is not healthy.

                I would gently, yet professionally, bring it up with Mom.


                • #9
                  I agree that subtly and gently talking to the mom is best for the child.

                  Unfortunately I've also had this happen with a little boy that was 5. I used this tactic and gave the child a small stuffed lion to borrow (he's Listening Lion, when the kids need to talk but they don't want to talk to a parent or to me they take him to a quiet area and talk to him) and told him that Listening Lion would listen to him at home at night if it happened again. Then when I talked to his mom at pick-up I just said something like

                  "Today (child) seemed a little put off and not himself. I asked if he was ok and it seems that he had a nightmare about you being attacked or something. He said he heard you screaming. Poor thing. Nightmares are awful when you're that age. They just seem so real. I gave him Listening Lion to take home and said he could borrow him until he was sure the nightmares wouldn't come back."

                  His mom just kind of looked at me and looked a little embarrassed but acted like it was a nightmare too. She said thank you and left. The dcb took the lion home over the weekend and brought him back on Monday and said that he didn't need him anymore. That it hadn't happened again but that one night. I think in the end even he thought that maybe he was dreaming afterall which in the end is probably best. Oy, parents these days.


                  Previously entered content was automatically saved. Restore or Discard.
                  Insert: Thumbnail Small Medium Large Fullsize Remove